Friday, April 11, 2014

Lent: Day Thirty-eight: Reconciled with Christ

Rom 5:10  For if, when we were enemies, we were reconciled to God by the death of his Son, much more, being reconciled, we shall be saved by his life.


This scripture tugged at me last night during our bible reading:

2 Cor. 5:14-19 For Christ’s love compels us, because we are convinced that one died for all, and therefore all died. And he died for all, that those who live should no longer live for themselves but for him who died for them and was raised again…. Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here! All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation: that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ,not counting people’s sins against them.

It tugged at me because what did it mean to be reconciled with Christ? Was God mad at me? Did I do something wrong that I needed to be reconciled with Him? Reconciled definition: to bring into agreement or harmony; make compatible or consistent.

Well there you go; a hearty clarification. I think we as humans always think of ourselves as gods over ourselves. That we are strong enough to go it alone without the aid of a higher power, a force so great He created the world in a breath. I’ve never thought of myself so high that I didn’t NEED God, but I thought there might be others out there struggling with this ego trip of arrogance on their own.

I do remember a time where I was so young and vulnerable that I felt invincible. I had lost my child, I was sixteen, and the invincibility carried me into age eighteen where I thought drinking was my shield from harm. That was until the night I overdosed on too much Schnapps and died passing out in my own vomit. I woke in a freezing shower unable to remember how I got there and only remember the bright lights that whisked me into the tub.

When I woke up in bed the next morning I had a totally different outlook on life. It was at that time I felt the need to be reconciled with Christ and a few journey’s later I became a dedicated servant of Christ. Yes I was saved at fourteen where I had given my life over to God, but I fell and I fell hard. I never turned away from Christ, but again, I had an ego of invincibility about me.
I had given birth to a deceased baby and any grown woman knows and understands the travails of childbirth. Well, to a sixteen-year-old kid who didn’t have a live fetus helping in the push, my pain was doubled.

I begged for mercy after my drunken stupor, then I went to work and to this day I live for Christ and Christ alone. I am reconciled with God and strive daily never to be the invincible ego driven brat I was as a child.

God loved me, the unlovable, with a rigorous commitment. He loved me when I tried to ignore His all consuming power. God saw me for the potential that was in me, when I saw none in myself. Christ walked a path for me, the sinner so that I may one day stand before God with all barriers of opposition gone.

And to you my friend I bear a message of reconciliation with God that no man/woman is excluded from. I hope that from my words you see a woman who is passionate about peace and reconciliation; a woman who is striving to be in alignment with my Lord and Savior.

To Him be the Glory!

God is not a deceiver, that He should offer to support us, and then, when we lean upon Him, should slip away from us. - Augustine

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