Job 11:18 "And thou shalt be secure, because there is hope; yea, thou shalt dig about thee, and thou shalt take thy rest in safety."
There Is Hope
After a week-long bout of depression, I see that there IS hope in the future. The more and more I learn I can see and feel a future of Hope and promise. Knowledge is power, prayer is powerful, and moving forward is Hope-filled.
It all began last Saturday with a city-wide garage sales event. Not intending to hurt my feelings in any way, my husband commented after I said I love junk, I can’t wait to buy more, he said, “Careful, you don’t want to be like Lisa.” Lisa is my neighbor and she is a hoarder. You know, like the kind you see on tv that they do TV shows about? Yeah, my neighbor is like that with flower pots, pallets, end tables and bikes and more strewn all over the place and three vehicles she doesn't use because ‘they need work’. I’m more of a nic-nac fan. But the comment hurt and it brought me to silent tears.
I came home with a cross, a carved angel, and two other angels to add to my collection. That’s what I like. I spent less than five dollars. My collection of angels began when my dad bought a beautiful angel for my sister and at the time, my ex-bro-in-law didn’t ‘allow’ angels in the house. His reasoning was it took away from thoughts of God and became idol worship. I know how sound that DOESN’T sound, so I switched with my sister, the angel for my beloved pig my dad had bought me. If you don’t know the difference between God and angels, then you need a little more than your Holy Bible, my friend. I also own a Precious Moments collection as well as Dreamscicle Cherubs, compliments of my mother years ago growing up.
By Monday my hurt had festered and I didn’t feel like writing, walking or riding my bike. The funk was real and I felt like a shattered bottle on the ground. No, it wasn’t just that comment, it was also my feeling like a failure as a mother. I botched raising a good son and I feel the ramifications. He wants to move to Kentucky to meet his online girlfriend. Please, no comments or advice. This is a real hurt I need to work through. In time I may be able to write more. But the good news is, today he has a job interview!
By Wednesday I was begging for prayer from my spiritual family. Finally, my mood wasn’t because of food. I am getting better on the food moods and I’m a bit confused looking at a twenty-year-olds body in the mirror and feeling like an eighty-year-old woman with leather skin and all! I need to meditate. Yeah, even that stopped for a few days and I FELT the difference of not meditating as my days WITH meditating.
Job 6:11 "What is my strength, that I should hope? and what is mine end, that I should prolong my life?"
I’m going to go through this storm of my life fighting. If only it were just one illness, maybe I wouldn’t get down, but three? Why is God all about three’s? (Trinity ring a bell?) *winkwink* I have been fighting psoriasis my whole life, arthritis for about four years and now this disease that crept up on me like a snail crossing the busy highway!
Wouldn’t you know, that the healing remedy for all three illnesses require the exact same supplements? They're all tied together, like a woven blanket, the illnesses are just unraveling threads. The good news is I’m doing everything to heal all aspects and the recent purchase of Tea Tree Oil Shampoo and Conditioner has shown great results in just two days of use! So that perked me up a bit.
And don’t worry friends, I don’t care how down I get, I never give up on my Morning Prayer and worship and bible reading. NEVER! I am committed to God and worship only Him! He is the one helping me sail through this being my lighthouse in the storm. The angels are just for warmth when I need a hug, and comfort when I feel down. God has never let me down, and this path, as slow as molasses filled that it is, I’m HEALING! I feel it and SEE it.
All praise and Glory to God!
Pss. 71:5 "For thou art my hope, O Lord GOD: thou art
my trust from my youth."