Fear Tactics Used

Beauty in the dark. Concordia, Kansas

1 Sam. 22:23 “Abide thou with me, fear not: for he that seeketh my life seeketh thy life: but with me thou shalt be in safeguard.”

Fear Tactics Used

From day one, January 25 was riddled in fear tactics. Now I'd like the doctors to know what it felt like rushing me from one test to the other in tears, telling me I have a dreaded disease but, ‘we’ll be with you all the way,’ is all they offered and I haven’t seen one of them since the 25th of January.

Couldn’t the doctor have sent me straight for the biopsy? Why did I need a mammogram, CT scan, blood test AND a biopsy to confirm my diagnosis, all in one day? I’ll tell you why, to elicit fear. The BC doctor used fear the very first day by forcing me into a whirlwind of tests in my confused weakened state. I was told I had a dreaded disease then shuffled around like meat in a slaughterhouse.

That was their tactic from the get-go and it became obvious with the onc. #1 visit. She was full of the words you need to instill fear. Onc. #2 was an intimidating, overbearing older man and he knew what he was doing too. Instill fear in this little lady and she’ll be eating out of the palms of our hands like the fragile bird that she is. When onc. #2 called onc. #1 autistic, I knew something was wrong with these people’s minds. Name calling, really?

What they weren’t counting on was this fragile looking flower being one of the strongest people they more than likely will ever meet! The people they meet are scared and rightly so, they have been told all of their life that this illness will kill and maim them, so we’re going to poison your system and it will make you all better. Oh no wait, they don’t use the word poison. They use words like life or death. This will cure you. You’ll live. 

I still can’t figure that one out how poison cures. How can poisoning your body heal you? When you ask about the poison, they colorize the version. Like going from black and white to rainbows. When you question the poison and the damage it causes, they stumble to search for the right words to hook you. There’ll be no damage, your body will heal and repair from the toxins. Did you know that one spill of the juice, that is marked with skull and crossbones, can kill the administering person of the toxins? This is what they want to put in your veins, people!

When you suggest alternate routes they are adamant that this is a life and death situation and you need this poison! Even though later in life after you’re ‘healed’ you’ll be hit with Alzheimer’s, bronchitis, emphysema, you name it, a host of illnesses await you after the chemo route. You have no immune system to fight at this point. 

You know, I haven’t cried since I saw onc. #2. There is a pattern to my days of crying. The BC doctor visit, the onc. #1 visit, and the onc. #2 visit. Hmm, interesting. Why did they instill so much fear that I left in tears and WANTING to die? Don’t worry folks, I rebounded with a good nights sleep each time and woke rejuvenated in the hands of the Lord WANTING to live.

When I tell the doctors that I want to do this or that, they shrug it off and say no, no, no, you need US! You need chemotherapy and that is the only thing you need to get through this. I’ve read, witnessed, saw too much to take their word for it so thus I began my research. 

And here I am, feeling the best I’ve ever felt, twelve pounds lighter (unintentional, mind you) from healthier eating! I’m putting my mind at peace, my body is responding and there is a healing going on, on so many levels. I want to go back in a year, two years, five years and say to the doctors, here I am, still! 

Healing my mind, body, and soul, one step at a time. Now many who know me, knows I haven’t spoken to anyone in my family (besides my mother), since 2015 when my dad passed away. Not because of animosity, it's just that’s the way we are, we go our own way, and we’re fine with it. Well this weekend was my sisters’ birthday and I called her, kind of shocked her but it was like we had been speaking all these years. We still love each other and that's all that matters. 

I feel like I need to let them know I love them, whether they care for me or not, I care for them. The next step will be calling my brother and asking to do a Skype chat with my mother. That will really excite her to SEE me! She is not tech savvy and the tablet my brother bought her to use just sits in a wasteland.

Tomorrow marks seven weeks since the diagnosis. I’m still on my no sugar diet, and my target each day is zero carbs, but the most I get in an entire day is maybe five. I’ve allowed to my healing diet free-range vegetarian fed chickens eggs, two to be exact, for breakfast. The first two weeks were JUST veggies, and now I allow fruit and only the alkaline fruit that I NEED to beat this worm that has taken up residence in my body.

I am up to about fourteen supplements a day. As some may worry that these supplements might be toxic to my system, please understand, your prescribed drugs are more toxic than any God-given vitamin and herb and yes, four doctors are aware of what I’m using. You know what the doc’s say about the supplements I’m using? That I won’t need them if I go the healing-by-chemo-poison-my-system route because chemo heals everything! What they don’t add is what chemo KILLS! There are zero deaths from turmeric, vit. C, vit. D and such.

The supplements I use are not the mass manufactured at WalMart brand, I seek out the purest of vitamins and supplements and if you’re buying a supplement to aid in your healing, if it is mass produced you can pretty much be sure they have the toxic –oxides, colors, dyes and preservatives that are of no help to your healing of whatever it is you’re taking supplements for. Read the labels!!!

I think what I’ve unintentionally done is put the shoe on the other foot, so to speak. When I tell the doc’s I’m going it alone, they are gripped with fear because they know no other healing than what they’ve been taught scientifically. They don’t know the power of the Lord, the powerful healing that goes along with prayer, they cannot comprehend giving your life up for what they deem a fantasy man.

I live every day to wake up, breathe in the air, feel the warmth of the sunshine on my face and walk the path of healing. Do you honestly think that is what doctors and scientists do? Most people just wake to face another daunting day, to work, eat and sleep. They miss all of the powerful elements of beauty, prayer, spiritual and physical healing in between. They basically live to die, I LIVE to LIVE! Alleluia Amen! 

2 Peter 1:5-8 KJV “And beside this, giving all diligence, add to your faith virtue; and to virtue knowledge; And to knowledge temperance; and to temperance patience; and to patience godliness; And to godliness brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness charity. For if these things be in you, and abound, they make you that ye shall neither be barren nor unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ.”

Power in Prayer

Mark 1: 28-29  “And when he was come into the house, his disciples asked him privately, Why could not we cast him out? And he said unto them, This kind can come forth by nothing, but by prayer and fasting.”

Power in Prayer

When this New Year began I was not expecting to be on a journey of my lifetime. I thought I’d sail through the year until another one began. People wonder why I have such a firm belief? Because I KNOW my ways are not His ways, just as my plans are not His plans.

Isa. 55:8-9 “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the LORD. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.

We always THINK we are in total control but as you can see, nothing is ever in our control, like melting wax it is ALWAYS dripped into His hands and carried.

Did you ever wonder why the Asians (or people in other countries) are healthier than Americans? They knew something we didn’t and still don’t. They knew of prayer and meditation long before we ever did. When we hear of these herbal remedies and holistic healing, the Chinese are usually the first thing that comes to mind. We here in the Western World are not allowed to believe in that hokey stuff, we’re to believe what we’re brainwashed to believe. As evidenced, as a statement of FACT, we Americans are fed toxins! And we buy what they sell us, believe it won’t hurt us, yet we have one of the highest cancer rates in the world.

God placed these herbal remedies, natural cures here for us and as much as we say we read the bible we look over the parts of what they ate, what spices they used and what herbs were used as natural remedies for the ill. Mistletoe is just now being studied at the Bethesda Cancer hospital in Maryland, it's been studied in Germany for YEARS, frankincense is another element under study as a cancer cure, CURE people, not a pacifying drug that will mimic additional years added to your life!

Another cure surrounded by stigma sits in the facts in way of cannabis oil. The state of Nebraska has shot down the bill that would legalize the oil medicinally meaning guess what, cancer patients have to DIE or obtain the stuff illegally or move to a state where it is legal. Their reasoning? Legalizing medicinal Cannabis oil would encourage kids to smoke pot! How stupid is that? THAT’S what our country faces, people and politicians who don’t WANT what is best for the ill but what looks good and acceptable to the easily manipulated older folks. They accept whatever the government feeds them. I cannot comprehend why we are so far behind in finding cures. They say we need more money but what is the money for, to pay the researchers? A billion dollar industry doesn’t become that way unless funds are being misspent.

Why would medicinal oil encourage kids to smoke marijuana? They’re going to smoke weed anyway and they could care less about the medicinal oil hiding within the hemp plant. This from a government who has a nation addicted to pharmaceuticals. Does any of this make sense? It sure doesn’t to me. I’m a victim and the government is the abuser. They say it is my body and my choice but it certainly doesn’t feel like it as they try to force me into submission.

So what’s left? Prayer, that is the one mighty power that the government can’t control, charge money for or withhold from the people. Prayer is the one healer that doctors have zero belief in or control over. Prayer is my most powerful tool in beating this crud that’s decided to take up residence in me. My mind, my body, my soul CRAVES healing and in the Power of Prayer I WILL RECEIVE healing. 

When I got my PET scan the other day it was prayer and meditation that got me through the ninety-minute ordeal. After the young lady checks your blood sugar, mine was eighty, she injects you with radioactive dye. She then shuts the light off and leaves you alone for forty-five minutes as it goes through your system. They need minimal brain activity so you’re left in solitude.

Those forty-five minutes went pretty quickly as I wrapped myself in prayer and meditation. When the girl returned to the room, it had only seemed like twenty minutes. Just twenty more minutes left under the lights of the scan. Being claustrophobic, meditation is what I used to see me through the tube.

Now onto twenty minutes in the tube. The machine wasn’t the BIG O CT scan looking machine; the O was a much smaller and a tighter fit. The onc. doctor had given me a pill to take to calm me down before my scan but I, not liking to take drugs, didn’t take it and trusted God to be with me and get me through this. The machine hummed into life as I was being fed into its mouth. Eyes closed, as the humming and flashing of lights whirled around me, meditation began.

When I heard the words, “We’re done” it was music to my ears. I mistakenly opened my eyes as I was being backed out of the tube and I thanked the Lord for holding my hand during the entire ordeal. I was free to go on with my day, radioactive for eight hours, whatever that means. Was I now in the position to turn into the Incredible Hulk?  

I stopped by the Herbal Supplement store and there stood an elderly lady at the register, known by her fist name by the cashier. The small store was bustling with business. I guess this is only the first or second store in this area of this kind. Living in a state that is broken into counties by 70 miles or so, these kinds of stores are rare. Nebraska is way behind in the times. Actually, I feel like I’ve gone back in time where the only thing available is what is offered unless you feel like traveling. I’d be very comfortable in a horse and buggy on these dirt roads. 

This illness is not a death sentence as so many are misled to believe. I do have a choice and I choose to live. I will walk hand in hand with my Father as we sail through the storms of life. He has calmed the storms for me and in prayer, we communicate on an hourly basis. I’m reminded how the Healer HEALS. Those are not just words thrown into a book for show, the healing words are the TRUTH that we all live and believe, right? I know I do, there is POWER in PRAYER! Alleluia AMEN!

Pss. 34:18-20 “The LORD is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit. Many are the afflictions of the righteous: but the LORD delivereth him out of them all. He keepeth all his bones: not one of them is broken.”