Friday, May 05, 2017

I'm Gonna Let It Shine

1 Peter 1:7 “That the trial of your faith, being much more precious than of gold that perisheth, though it be tried with fire, might be found unto praise and honour and glory at the appearing of Jesus Christ:”

I’m Gonna Let It Shine

Do you have a goal in life? I never really was a goal setter and I don’t know if that is a good thing or a bad thing. I have since a young girl of about fourteen always had a plan, kind of, and that was for people to see Christ in me. 

You might say, well weren’t you a drug addict and alcoholic? And I would quite bluntly and honestly admit that yes, yes I WAS. BUT here’s the thing, people always saw God in me. Comments like, “Oh she’s that God person”, or “Don’t ask her for advice, she’ll give you a sermon.” stuck with me. I went through life thinking, I’m a God person, and that is what people see in me, even in my darkest days, they see a Light.

As an adult, in hindsight, I see that it wasn’t my plan after all; I think seeing God in me has been His plan all along. While being dragged through coals of fire, being darkened by pain and strife, I always saw God. People would often wonder how I could see God through raging storms of hell. Again, quite bluntly I responded with, “Because He never lets me down.”

Drug addiction and alcoholism didn’t break me, being sexually abused didn’t taunt me, the loss of two children didn’t crack me like an egg, I plowed on refining my light so that the world would see the brilliance shining from me. 

Last week I went to WalMart. I was standing inside as I waited for hubby to park the car. It was a chilly rainy day so I opted for being let off at the door instead of walking in the rain. I stood inside and my eye caught an older lady and man as they passed me. She had an ear-to-ear smile as our eyes met, then her hand went to her husband's arm as she was gently nodding towards me. Did she know me? Recognize me, what? I didn’t recognize her but I smiled back.

As I walked through the store, I felt like I had a neon sign on my forehead because for some reason I noticed more and more people smiling at me. Not just the smirky kind of smile, smiles that said, I SEE you! What? It was an interesting shopping event, to say the least. This week I went shopping but this time I was going to notice what and why the smiles were there.

I realized that I had a smile on my face for every passer-by. Whether a crotchety old woman, a disgruntled older man, a mom with a screaming child, I had a smile for each and every one of them and they could do nothing more but to look at me, and smile back!

My ego would say, oh yeah, I’m all that. But the portion of a realist in me says, they see me; they see CHRIST in me. Instead of looking at people and forming a judgment in my mind, ‘she wore THAT’, ‘she needs to lose weight’, or ‘take a chill pill dude’, I looked with an intense gaze and thought, GOD, BLESS YOU!

I think the drastic change in my diet has caused my mind to expand on some metaphysical level; I see God in everything. Yes, this has always been parts of me but lately, it is ALL of me not just a portion of me.   

It’s not easy looking intently into someone’s eyes and seeing their pain, like the crotchety old woman who had a bit of road rage on the way to the store. I offer a smile. To the grumpy older man who was hesitant in getting out of bed and going shopping on his own because he NEEDED his medication, I offer my smile. To the man who has a bit of impatience brewing while waiting in a long line, I smile and let him go ahead of me, silently blessing each and every one as they pass. 

Can you imagine what kind of world we’d live in if every person took it upon themselves to bless people? I know the world is set on destruction but individuals can make a difference by shedding a light in all the dark places. They’re everywhere you walk, they’re in every person you have eye contact with, bubbling under the surface, with a light and a smile, the anger can be dispelled.

My General Practioner’s office called the other day, Ashley said, “Dr. *** wanted me to call and see how you’re doing and if you need anything.” 

I said, “I’m doing GREAT! I didn’t go to chemo and I’m feeling GREAT!”

July is my sixth-month marker and I was informed the doctor will be leaving in July since she’s finished up her two-year residency. I told Ashley, I’d make a well patient visit before the doctor left. I WILL go and shine the light for all to see! Test or no test, this little light of mine, I’m gonna let it shine! Let it shine, let it shine, let it shine!!!

I thought I’d share this for you to keep in mind:
From the Purpose Driven Life: “The Bible often compares trials to a metal refiner’s fire that burns away the impurities. Peter said, “These troubles come to prove that your faith is pure. This purity of faith is worth more than gold.” (1 Peter 1:7) A silversmith was asked, “How do you know when the silver is pure?” He replied, “When I see my reflection in it.” When you have been refined by trials, people can see Jesus’ reflection in you. James said, “Under pressure, your faith-life is forced into the open and shows its true colors.” (James 1:3).”

James 1:3  “Knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience.”


benning said...

Very nice, Joni. :D

*HUGS!* <3

joni said...

Aww...thanks Ben! :D

*HUGS* <3