Monday, October 18, 2010

Decisions, Decisions...

Everything changes when you change. ~Jim Rohn

Woulda, coulda, shoulda, have to!

Ever run these through your brain.

Have you ever had a decision to be made, only to find that someone else took it upon themselves to make it for you? Can I ask, how did you feel and where did that leave you emotionally?

Me? I run on emotions. I get my fuel from the drinking pool of the Word, but my physical emotional state runs neck and neck with the ‘do this’ pool. I’ve been talking a lot about pools lately. I must miss Texas!

I personally like to make my own decisions. Whether it is to clean, mow, write, mope. These are the decisions I like to make for myself and when someone pipes in, “You have to do (clean)this,” or “You should (write) do that,” or worse, “Joni is going to (get a life) do this...” it always makes me want to run in the opposite direction and do something completely off the wall, you know, just to stir things up in the ‘pool’ of life?

I don’t like someone to tell me or anyone else (gossip) what *I* am going to do, when *I* haven’t even made a concrete decision in what I was going to do in the first place. I don’t like buckling to pressure. I don’t think anyone does. It makes a person feel incompetent in making his/her own decisions.

I remember telling people, I’m going off to become a writer, within a years time, they were like, “Did you write that novel yet? Make any money? You should get a real job! You would be better off. Think of what you could have.”

Yup, it’s the woulda, coulda, shoulda factor.

Pressure shatters me like a delicate vase on the ledge of a windowsill of an opened window. Any minute, I could come crashing down and break into a million pieces. If you’re going to tell me WHAT to do, why not put a vise on my head and turn until my brains pop out?

Yes, I have written a novel, I have a poetry book(s) in the works, my revisions are slow, finding a publisher is next. But will you share the truth of what I just said or will you spin your own take on it?

“Joni has found a publisher!” they say.

“Joni is a writer, and is going to be published. She said so herself.”  they retort.

Love that optimism people. Encourage me to keep it up! Say things like, “I hope you make the right decision.” Help by adding, “I know this decision must be hard and I know you’ll do the right thing.” But please, oh please don’t tell people I am definitely going to do this or that, unless I’ve told you that this is what I’m definitely going to do.

Encourage a writer to write, but don’t discourage them by saying, “You’re not published yet? I thought you were going to do that years ago?” Years ago I said I was going off to become a writer, and yes, that is exactly what I’m doing! WRITING!

"When you come to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. "~ Franklin D. Roosevelt


Kristena said...

I'm sorry for your disappointment today Joni, but through this you have been a real inspiration to me!

I have always wanted to write, but never have because I was told it would never go anywhere... I wasn't good enough to get noticed.

why do I listen to others?

joni said...


If I had listened to everyone else, I would never have left Baltimore, never pursued my dream, never have done anything!

My point being, if we listen to others who want to make our decisions for us, we'll never feel competent in making decisions for ourselves. Whether we make a right or wrong decision, it is ours to make!

You can write Kristena, I've read your words! You CAN become the writer that you've dreamed of! Don't EVER listen to those who say you can't!

If it never amounts to anything, so what! You followed your heart, you listened to YOU! That is what is most important! :)

((((big hugs)))

Writing is my emotional healer. :)
Can't ya tell?lol

M. SUE said...

...and an updated version..."When you reach the end of your rope, you will find the hem of His garment..."
Wow! How comforting is that!
Smiles ~ Sue suesmuse

joni said...

Very comforting Sue! Thank you! :)

June said...

Your writing reaches out to others, Joni and anything written from the heart speaks to others.

You are following your passion. That brings joy....You're awesome!

joni said...

My heart is all I know. :)

Thanks June!