Showing posts with label pit. Show all posts
Showing posts with label pit. Show all posts

Sunday, December 11, 2016

Poetry Sunday ~ No Heaven In Hell

Image by Elaine DeBoucher

Pss. 139:8 “If I ascend up into heaven, thou art there: if I make my bed in hell, behold, thou art there.”

No Heaven in Hell

There is no heaven in hell
Only a place for sin to dwell
The liars charred in flaming fire
When hell becomes their one desire.

There is no hell in heaven
Souls transform like leaven
To rise above the earthly skies
Heaven gives home to the wise.

There is no heaven in hell
The hypocrites home a shell
Tears will be shed for the dead
Who dare not cling to the Bread.

There is no hell in Heaven
Unclean souls to beckon
Roaming through the stardust light
Bid the cosmos a sweeping g’nite.

There is no heaven in hell
The party’s over it's time to quell
Thirst you crave throughout the day
Allow our Lord to Light the way!

~ ~ ~ * * * ~ ~ ~

Isa. 35: 8-10 And a highway will be there;
    it will be called the Way of Holiness;
    it will be for those who walk on that Way.
The unclean will not journey on it;
    wicked fools will not go about on it.
 No lion will be there,
    nor any ravenous beast;
    they will not be found there.
But only the redeemed will walk there,
     and those the Lord has rescued will return.
They will enter Zion with singing;
    everlasting joy will crown their heads.
Gladness and joy will overtake them,
    and sorrow and sighing will flee away.

Thursday, April 14, 2016

Working Through Resentment

1 Sam. 2:3 “Talk no more so exceeding proudly; let not arrogancy come out of your mouth: for the LORD is a God of knowledge, and by him actions are weighed.”


Working through resentment is a tough pill to swallow. It is so hard to just forgive and let go but this is truly what I’m trying to do, if only the pain didn’t go so deep. I feel like I’m swimming in an ocean with no life preserver and I’m sinking due to the weight of resentment laying heavy on me at this time. 

I resent having to eliminate much of my facebook feed to only see three or four friends that I KNOW aren’t out to butt kiss and show off. They’re actual people with things to say and post things of actual interest to me. I think the root of the problem is my actual resentment towards facebook for not being a friendly place anymore and just being a load of political zombie garbage that no one wants to take out, they just dump it in the ocean and swim. 

“You must not lose faith in humanity. Humanity is like an ocean; if a few drops of the ocean are dirty, the ocean does not become dirty.” 
― Mahatma Gandhi

Who would’ve thought that Gandhi would be helping me out in this? Not me that’s for sure but I don’t judge a man because of his faith and religion and I admire a man of words, real words. But I’m sure there is someone out there ready to chide me for my choices. Oh well, such is life.

“With each opportunity before me, God presented me with a choice. I could accept His offerings, His wisdom, His grace. Or I could choose to hold onto the pain, the anger and the resentment a little longer.” 
― Sharon E. Rainey

I could go on and on of the list of the resentment war path that has curled up inside of me like a snake warming itself but seriously I’d rather work through the resentment and find a healing place where I can find solace and be free to think of my own fruition instead of having to daily build walls. But please know I do have someone ready to clean up the mess I leave behind. God is by my side all the way and I find He wants this healing from me too. He’s brought along the shovel so as we climb the mountain together we can shovel this mess over the side of a cliff and release it to the air.

I can in good conscience say this didn’t all start with the political postings that get on my last nerve, no this began when I lost my father and I’ve had a hard time dealing with the surfacing of resentment that bubbled up from the pit. 

Mrs. Peppity-Pep Goodie-two-shoes is pooped out. I’m tired, I’m done. I just can’t put on the brave face and act like nothing bothers me when here lately looking at me the wrong way will get you your head chopped off. People reach out their hand only to pull it back (fear of it being chopped off?) People know of my disability but they expect so much more than my pea brain can manage. They want to help but do nothing. How is offering to help someone by a few words helping someone, with no follow through?

My friends, I’ve said it before and I will say it time and time again that actions speak louder than words. Your actions hurt people more than help. I was already struggling not to go down into the pit but add the hate-spewers to the mix and they forced me into the pit like dunking my head under water and holding it there. Thank you. Now go on with your life pretending to be who you are not and feel good about yourself. Just know that your ignorance shines brighter than ANY scripture you can post. The bad/evil does not outweigh the good. 

I wanna be the one to walk in the sun, oh yeah, I just wanna have fun. Oh yeah I just wanna have fun. ~ similar to Cyndi Lauper’s, Girls Just Wanna Have Fun. 

Am I still grieving? No, my dad is at peace and I find peace in knowing he is safe and happy. Am I depressed? Yes, the world suffocates me and I’m laughed at for my beliefs although I don’t carry that laughter with me, instead I carry God with me, the very one you claim to believe but do nothing to follow. Again, ACTIONS speak louder than WORDS.

I will lower my head for now and work through my resentment. I’ll work through the anguishing pain (another thing no one understands) and I’ll go forward into the spring with dandelion bouquets sprouted on my lawn and I will appreciate their beauty for all that they are!

I will read this poem below as daily as I pray. I will hear the words in my heart and I will find a healing place. Away from you, away from the negative flow, away from the pain burning inside me. 

Godspeed…

REMEMBER THE LOTUS FLOWER

Great people will always be mocked by those
Who feel smaller than them.
A lion does not flinch at laughter coming from a hyena.
A gorilla does not budge from a banana thrown at it by a monkey.
A nightingale does not stop singing its beautiful song
At the intrusion of an annoying woodpecker.
Whenever you should doubt your self-worth, remember the lotus flower.
Even though it plunges to life from beneath the mud,
It does not allow the dirt that surrounds it
To affect its growth or beauty.
Be that lotus flower always.
Do not allow any negativity or ugliness
In your surroundings
Destroy your confidence,
Affect your growth,
Or make you question your self-worth.
It is very normal for one ugly weed
to not want to stand alone.
Remember this always.
If you were ugly,
Or just as small as they feel they are,
Then they would not feel so bitter and envious
Each and every time they are forced
To glance up at magnificently
Divine YOU.
― Suzy Kassem

Monday, August 10, 2015

The Pits

Concordia, Kansas

Pss. 40:2 “He brought me up also out of an horrible pit, out of the miry clay, and set my feet upon a rock, and established my goings.”

The Pit

It saddens me when people are so filled with hate that they need to point fingers, laugh at, mock, joke and make fun of people (after posting scripture mind you). The world is so full of negative influence that people just fall right into the web of deceit.

They are misled and misguided and they are only a source of light and inspiration to make themselves look good? It puzzles me to no end how people really feel good about themselves when they KNOW they’re not following God FOR God, they follow Him for looks.

I liken the world to a pit; a pit where people are clawing at the mud, trying to find purpose in their existence and just spilling more mud because clawing is only stirring up the avalanche of clay that will soon bury them knee deep in the mire.

They seek but cannot find; they search but cannot grasp; they claw and fill their nails deep with the clinging clay. They are stretching for everything out of arms reach. They think but they don’t think fully; they aim but always miss the target.

"Authenticity is a collection of choices that we have to make every day. It's about the choice to show up and be real; the choice to be honest; the choice to let our true selves be seen." ~ Brené Brown

People seem to graze at the truth but never end up capturing the truth. When the truth is captured they can lay claim to their authentic self, which has eluded them while seeking out the wrong things in life.

Why do people strive for what they can’t have? Why do they poke fun at others or crave what other people have? Why do people try to claim goodness when so much is eating at them where they need to release a negative spin on almost everything they touch, read or hear?

I see people trying so hard at being good but they lose track when they try too hard. Being good and righteous should not be a chore that one undertakes, it should be a flow of natural behavior that many, all too many, do not understand. 

They would much rather tread in a mud-filled pit and try to define good and bad and cling to both. It can’t be done. I see it being done but really it should not be a way to live. You cannot serve the masters of good and bad, right and wrong, dark and light. You’ll find yourself stuck in the pit and never finding sure footing of a way to get out. 

You can try and find God, but cling to the negative juncture in the road. You will try to see the light, but offer up a dark shading umbrella for people to climb under. You pretend to offer light but secretly hide the darkness within you and that is what is shining forth, not the light within you. 

Now I see where the term, ‘the pits’ comes from, “the pits” as slang for the very worst, the most degraded and depressing example of something. To me, humanity is ‘the pits’!  They live there, breathe there, share there and cling to their own beliefs infecting others like a wildfire burning out of control with the compulsion of negativity. People of the same thought process, ‘we can serve two masters and get away with it’ feed the pits.

I myself, when I see negative reactions to things I run like a bat outta hell! I won’t allow myself to be infected so I strive to spread light and love in hopes to give the people in the pits a rope to hold onto to pull themselves out.

While they continue on the path of politicizing everything, children are being beaten to death. While they fill their bodies with food and nourishment, people are dying without a bit of kibble to bite on. While they’re off laughing and enjoying poking fun at people, there are people being battered and bullied physically.  

Before laughing at all of the crazy crud going on in the world take action, not words and memes but first, take a look inside yourself and see what is bullied and battered and why you feel the need to poke fun at others. Maybe you’ll see a way out of that pit you find yourself dwelling.


Matt. 18:33 “Shouldest not thou also have had compassion on thy fellowservant, even as I had pity on thee?”



Sunday, August 17, 2014

Poetry Sunday ~ Fiery Pit

Isa. 13: 8 And they shall be afraid: pangs and sorrows shall take hold of them; they shall be in pain as a woman that travaileth: they shall be amazed one at another; their faces shall be as flames.

Fiery Pit

Alone in the fiery pit
No one near to see
Flames licking at my side
The walls that smother me.

Heavy eyes raised to glance
The yellow, orange and blue
Holding me within its grasp
Feet cling to the floor of glue.

I cannot move; no hands reach out
I’m caught in the raging flare
The sound is all but deafening
In its race to singe my hair.

Is this a dream I can’t wake from
The abyss alarmingly real
My limbs are numb as the blaze erupts
There’s nothing for me to feel.

Why do people pass right by
Not hearing the harrowing screams;
Is a smile enough to make them think
All’s normal or so it seems?

Alone am I in the fiery pit
While people are blind to the pain
They’ll live the fantasy that all is well
As I dance in the fan-flamed rain.

Move on you sleeping nation
Your hypocrisy is wearing thin.
Pretending to care and moving on
As I peel my melting skin.
 
 

Friday, August 15, 2014

The Demons Within


Isa. 38: 18 For the grave cannot praise thee, death can not celebrate thee: they that go down into the pit cannot hope for thy truth.



From RST: “Robin (Williams) was blessed with a gift to bring joy and laughter to millions of people. NO ONE THIS SIDE OF HEAVEN FULLY UNDERSTANDS THE ABOUNDING GRACE OF OUR LORD JESUS CHRIST! Scripture tells us not to say this one will go to heaven or this one will not. We don't have the authority. I hope he IS a brother in Christ. How about instead of passing judgment or spewing malice and hardened opinions, we who are Christ's followers lift up his family and loved ones in prayer. After all Christ IS abounding, unfathomable, never ending love. Hope, faith, and love and the greatest of these things is love. Hope to see Robin Williams in the kingdom one day! He will be missed until then.”

I read a beautiful article on suicide here.

While I’ve suffered depression and rose from the ashes, on many occasions the flames still seem to smolder never really smothered. I do have Jesus as an anchor in my life and always have but I wonder, if on the edge of suicide, will Jesus reach in and pour water on the flames surrounding you, so you don’t die? Well, we know He could, but He doesn’t impose His free will on our free will. If we consciously made the decision to kill ourselves, that is OUR CHOICE to do so, and the Lord doesn’t stop the act.

The above article really hit the nail on the head for me. Depression often feels like you’re inside a burning building and the only way out is a window that you jump through to what inevitably turns out to be your death.

You see, depression stems from a loneliness. A place where you’re surrounded by people but always feeling alone. Sometimes even a rich person, who has tons of friends, is always seemingly happy is fighting on the inside the loneliness that has enveloped him in a fiery fan of flames.

How do I explain the inner demons that we humans struggle with on a daily basis? I don’t think *I* can and I certainly don’t feel a psychiatrist can. People and doctors can try; they can provide pills to dummy you up so you don’t feel anything or give you words of encouragement, or even hand you a bible and say, “Read this, you’ll get better.”

The loneliness pit is a place where you finally take a look at YOU and you’re not happy with what you see.  I had an uncle who was a sufferer of PTSD from the remnants of the Vietnam War. He sought help and while the government gave him help it was never enough to lift him out of the pit. He had friends and even turned to them on the day he committed suicide. He went around telling them, “I’m going to jump from a bridge today, I’m done with it all.”

They all laughed and scoffed saying, “Here have a beer”, or whatever the drug of choice that was offered him, gave him no comfort, no release from the pit. They had heard it before many times, many attempts, with no success.

He went and jumped off the Francis Scott Key Bridge to his death. The problems with his prior attempts was, the bridge wasn’t high enough, so this time, he made sure it was. He had cried out and no one heard, no one took serious the seriousness of a death threat.

I imagine before Robin Williams death (pure conjecture here) when on the night before his death as his wife was leaving the house, he assured her over and over, “I’m fine, really.” Always the people pleaser, he didn’t let on to his own wife the depths of the pit he had fallen in and brushed it off in a joke and sent her on her way. He would then turn, go up the stairs and have a conversation with his loneliness, the pit of demons that let him know, “We’re here for you!”

No thought of family dwells in the pit. No external love resides there. Jesus is certainly not hanging out in the pit of your worst thoughts, you’re dangling by threads of insanity, all of which are being held by demons edging you on to a place of comfort, coddling you, caressing you, welcoming you. A place you don’t need to please anyone, a place that surrounds your mind in a blanket suffocating any thoughts except that of YOU and what YOU’VE become.

You’re not dangling in thoughts of love and family, thoughts of joy and happiness, no, you’ve taken up with the demons of comfort that are whispering all the things you want to hear; things about YOU, there’s room for no one else in the smothering pit.

When someone says they’re depressed. Whether clinically or just depressed (sad, lonely, hurt, aching) Please don’t laugh them off and hand them an answer that works for YOU, this is their battle, one you CAN’T fight for them and one you can’t lift them out of.

Don’t tell them they ‘should’ do this, or they ‘should’ do that, that is the worse thing you can say. What they need to hear is that you’re there for them. They need to know you care, and often people ‘claim’ to care and be concerned, but then they disappear thinking the person is fine. The person is in a fiery pit with their inner demons and you think they’re fine? Nice assumption!

Don’t ASSUME, be willing to listen! LISTEN, not spew should’s and should not’s, LISTEN. More than anything, while in the pit of depression, people are too eager to please OTHER people, make them laugh and smile; when all they needed was for one person to LISTEN. And no one ever has the time, to just listen.

If the many friends and family surrounding Robin Williams had LISTENED, would we be talking about his suicide? I can’t answer that, I’m only talking from my pit.

I praise the Lord every day that He stands with me in my pit, dousing the flames bit by bit, but other people don’t have the company, they are in the pit alone; alone and smothering.

If you’re ever in the pit with no one who will listen and death looks much better than facing life, please call the Suicide Hotline – 1-800-273-8255. Keep the number in a handy spot on the fridge, sometimes we never know that the person right beside us is about to make the wrong choice.

You might give up on Him, but He will NEVER give up on YOU!

God Bless You!