Sunday, March 09, 2008

Children Die Becasue We Lie!

Children die because we lie.
When we tell them everything is going to be fine in life and in reality it just isn’t! Why are children being neglected? Who is doing the neglecting? Parents? Teachers? Who is to blame? How long will we watch children succumb before we finally stand up and take notice?

Ask many successful college students what helped them in their success, nine times out of ten, they say it was their parents involvement. (and not just monetary)

Ask children today why they do immoral things, they say, "Because my parents don’t know what I’m doing when they’re not around!"
We can blame Harry Potter for leading kids to demonic forces, we can leave children home alone to defend themselves against predators, we can gripe and place blame all we want but are we getting anywhere? And is this the truth in where we should be placing blame?

Placing blame on others is easy because it takes the blame away from us.
When I sat with a college student and asked "What got you to this place?"

His quick response was, "My parents involvement in my life."

"Really?" I asked, "Is that the way you perceive it?" I continued, "Can you elaborate?"

"My parents were involved from the beginning, they came to all of my school activities, whether they were bored or not, whether they had "other" things to do, they put me first."

"And you feel this is what enabled you to become successful?"

"Yes!" he said, "Most definitely. Without their constant involvement I may have been more apt to find my peers more exciting which would more than likely have led me down the wrong path." He offered.

Then I casually asked a college dropout what led him to drop out of college.

He said, "I got to college, got caught up in drinking with my friends and my grades plummeted so I dropped out. My parents had gotten a divorce not long before I went away to college and I realized that maybe my mom needed me at home. I was drinking, failing, and missing home, so I quit."
"Was your mom disappointed in you?" I asked.

"Initially she was," he went on "But her love for me all through my life and when I got back home encouraged me to try and be successful no matter what came my way."

On the flip side, I asked not so successful adults why they think they failed in life. Again, it was unanimous, parental involvement or should I say non-involvement!

Parental involvement is critical in raising our children to become successful adults. Being an involved parent means forsaking some of your own wants and needs for the love of your child’s wants and needs. They need YOU the parent to guide them in the right direction, teach them morals, teach them the difference between right and wrong! This doesn’t mean that when they become teens allow them to sit alone at home on the computer surfing the web. (remember they are hormonal youths!) Don’t go to work thinking they no longer need your assistance at home (these are the critical years that you need to be there!)

Don’t assume that because your child exceeds at school, sports and having friends that he is well rounded and adjusted to his environment (remember peers have more influence than you, the parent)
Take the initiative and GET INVOLVED! Show your support when he/she fails. Be at home when they are at home. Keep the computer in the family room where they are less likely to get involved with immoral behavior with "net friends", and most importantly COMMUNICATE!
When you allow them to do what they want, they are going to do what THEY want and that is what their peers are counting on, YOU NOT BEING THERE FOR THEM!

1 comment:

benning said...

Seems we spend so much time making sure our little darlings learn self-esteem there's no time left to learn the real lessons.

Parents must be involved, which sometimes means explaining that the teachers are wrong. And that self-esteem i earned through hard work.

I'm just sayin'.