Poetry Sunday ~ Lil Green Patch

 Ex. 23:20 Behold, I send an Angel before thee, to keep thee in the way, and to bring thee into the place which I have prepared.

***

Lil Green Patch

Where flowers in a field did prance

the moonglow perches ready to dance,

coyotes howl, the elk they call

on the crux of the rising fall.

Spilling over are leaves on the lawn

silently I await the dawn.

Darkness lingers as frost gives rise

I wipe the stardust from the skies.

Little hearts all take a bow;

shooting stars kiss me somehow.

They reach across the open plain

sprinkle down like falling rain.

Drizzled in an earthly show

something grander is here, I know.

Within my mind, I speak to them 

give a little of all that I am.

An earthly angel they see in flight

to bear to them a heavenly Light.

The heavens open in a fury

to Him I tend to give all glory.

Awakened now from this dream

everything is, as it would seem.

From the pages I dispatch,

the joy I found in a lil green patch.

From Oct. 2010 © Joni Zipp

Should I Stay?

Habakkuk 1:5 Behold ye among the heathen, and regard, and wonder marvellously: for I will work a work in your days, which ye will not believe, though it be told you.  (KJV)

Should I stay?

Should I stay or should I go

Conflicting thoughts as you know.

Do I stay and try to conform

Or do I shout, “Look, I’m reborn?”

We often see this world as a riddle

God on top with man in the middle.

We try to fit in but just don’t know

Should I stay or should I go?

The world around has brought a chill

wrapped in the blanket of my free will

I have a seed that I must sow.

I’m sure I’ll stay, not ready to go.

I feel the change that’s covered me

I look to Him; it’s all I see.

I think I’ll stay, while they go

on with life their earthly show.

Show vs. Tell

Joni’s going to write a blog post today.

Joni sits at her desk, pencils, paper, stapler surrounding her. A deep sigh leaves her mouth as she sits contemplating, ready to tap on the keys preparing to write today’s blog.

Aha! I think I’ll write about SHOW vs. Tell! In the first sentence I told you what Joni was going to do. In the second sentence I SHOWED you.

I often read from beginning writers, ‘What is the difference in show vs. tell?’ I read many mentor’s critiques exclaiming, ‘You need to show more than tell’.

Showing is more specific in terms as it lays out the picture for you. General terms are good when you need to tell when something is happening that is brief in the story. Whereas, showing moves the story along from point A to point B.

To tell a story, one only needs to say,

Mary went to the store.

To help in getting the picture across to your reader, the ones who are following your every word, you need to learn how to SHOW them the story.

Mary grabbed her purse, hurried out the front door to walk down to the corner store. The screen door slammed as her mother called from behind, “Don’t forget the bread.”

You can see Mary in your mind, can’t you? You no longer are holding a non-descriptive image of Mary, you now see a woman grabbing her purse and rushing out the door, only to be halted by the voice of her mother.

Think of yourself reading a book. You don’t start at the end, you begin at the first page. You take it slowly and read one page at a time so you can grasp the entire picture.

Taken out of context, you can speed read a page here and there but do you fulfill your journey of enjoyment? Showing and telling can give you the same information. But with the showing the reader gets to savor each and every word in a visual manner.

Creating a mental picture for the reader is important if you care for them enough to read to the end. Children love fairy tales where they don’t need a lot of the weighted down imagery; they get picture books to supply the images. But novels or short stories need to tap into the mental cinema of the reader’s mind.

Telling is fine for trivial things like it was a stormy day. If the storm is essential to moving the story along or part of the immediate scene then showing should be done. Don’t over do it with the imagery so no one says you’re padding your work. Showing should come as a natural flow to you.

I was sad when my dog died.

This is telling you how I felt when my dog died.

I was miserable when my dog died. It hurt so much I could just spit. I never expected him to die and now he’s left me alone and lonely for companionship.

This is padding the telling and not really showing you how I felt. You read that my dog died, I hurt, and I felt alone.

Now let me try to SHOW you how I felt.

Today I was utterly distracted when the puppies in the park were playing Frisbee, it reminded me of my Skippy. My friend for life or so I thought, until he contracted a deadly virus that took him from my life. No longer do I look at his bowls the same way as they still sit on the floor near the door.

This statement gives more specific details, without telling how I “felt”. You can read in my words that I miss him. You can read my hurt without using the word. You can read that I miss my dog and that I’m hurting just by getting the longing feeling from, “No longer do I look at his bowls the same way.”

The point of "showing" is not to drown the reader in a sea of details. Instead, you should pick out only those instrumental details that matter.

Give your reader something to hold onto. Have them frothing at the mouth waiting to read more of your pain and anguish. Give him/her a tale of beauty with ribbons of sensory and imagery. Save the telling for the hairdresser.

Give your writing some music and it will SING!

The Season of Gifting?

Prov.15:27 He that is greedy of gain troubleth his own house; but he that hateth gifts shall live.
***

I remember so many times as a child getting through the crowds at Christmas time, trying to hail a cab with my mother because we had so many bags and boxes we just couldn’t fit onto the overstuffed bus!  Pushing through the throng of shoppers, waiting in long lines, pressing through to get that one special gift!

My mother would take herself broke to give to others. Always on Christmas eve, running at the last minute to get just one more ‘special’ gift. She’d pay dearly all year long for having a giving heart. Did it cloud my view of what Christmas was all about? No, it opened my eyes to the unnecessary attachments we hold to the gift giving season.

Have we as a society gotten away from the real reason we even have a Christmas or has the world colored our vision so much so that we feel the need to give give give? I remember AFTER Thanksgiving, the stores would decorate, the streets would become a bastion of light shows, the trees, the street signs would all welcome this gift giving season with open arms.

Now the Christmas holiday is ushered in right after Halloween, forcing us to think that if we don’t get an early start, we won’t ever be able to get that perfect gift for the ones we love. The season is shaded by giving gifts, even if that means taking yourself broke. Buying and spending, all in the name of love? So are you telling me, love has a price tag on its head and if I don’t give you a gift, I don’t love you?

How clouded is that theory? Commercialism will not suck me dry. It will own no part of my soul. When I give, I give year-round, I give of myself, my time, something treasured from my heart that I know will impact a person for years (seconds, minutes, days?) to come. I don’t spend money at Christmas! I buy my son a gift, beau a gift, and everyone else receives my presence.

The only reason I celebrate Christmas, the pagan holiday, is because tradition almost demands it of me. While others are out buying, shopping, feeling good about themselves, sometimes they overlook the reason they are giving in the first place.

Are they doing it to make themselves look good? Others feel good? That is all well and good, but wouldn't a batch of homemade cookies, or hand-knitted scarf, or a simple poem, picture or other treasure from the heart mean more than a gift certificate from Macy's? Top-notch perfume? The 'perfect' purchased gift? Think about the answer you just thought!

Think about it a minute. If everyone truly gave from their heart and soul, (meaning, not spending a dime on the 'show') the stress of the season would be relinquished! Money could be given to HELP people, and EVERYONE would have a warm feeling during this day of celebrating Christ’s birth, and all that His presence meant to the world.

Are You a Writer?

Acts 14:15 And saying, Sirs, why do ye these things? We also are men of like passions with you, and preach unto you that ye should turn from these vanities unto the living God, which made heaven, and earth, and the sea, and all things that are therein:
***

Are you a writer or a teller of stories? There is a difference you know.

A teller of stories is one that can evoke visual images just by verbally communicating words or writing them down before the thought gets away. But that’s just it, its a story written down.

Now a writer, that’s a whole other ball game. Anyone basically can tell a story, but a writer? Now he/she needs to tell a story, revise it twenty times, edit it, grammarize it, (as opposed to glamorize), and then the writer needs to sell it or put it in storage. A writer publishes whether it is in blog form or not, on the net or magazines, works for pennies, writes for months, possibly years and has not one dollar bill hanging on the wall declaring, “My first dollar made writing!”

If this is you, then you are a writer!

I notice a lot of new young writers think that writing is all about telling a story. Not SHOWING you a story visually. A writer evokes feelings in the reader that sometimes he never knew was there to begin with. The young writer also thinks that grammar and punctuation are for the editor’s desk and that they don’t really have to worry about things like that, they’re writers after all.

Allow me to tell you this, writing is not separate from grammar. It all fuses together to form a complete work and sending out a sloppy, grammatically challenged piece of work is like sending you to the electric chair, and the outcome isn’t going to be pretty. Ever see The Green Mile? Nope, not pretty at all.

A writer does his/her homework! Okay, I can understand my visually hindered blog friends, a screen reader can not tell you that their is not there. You are an exception to the rule. There is no excuse for the people who can see the error but don’t fix it or doesn’t educate themselves to see if they have it right to begin with.

Writers need to be educated before you post your work! If you are in the English speaking country, then by all means, learn the English language. If you are in a foreign country, learn your language, the correct grammar and how to submit a worthwhile piece of art. Don’t let a comma or misspelled word get you tossed in the trash. Do your homework and then click POST, or SUBMIT. It will truly make the difference between the word PUBLISHED and REJECTED.

Poetry Sunday~ Lonely Christmas~

Psalm 34: 2 My soul shall make her boast in the LORD: the humble shall hear thereof, and be glad.
***

Lonely Christmas?

Where are you Christmas?
My heart is hanging low.
Like a tattered worn out ribbon;
a frayed old crumpled bow.

Tinsel has lost its luster;
lights have all drawn dim.
I cradle my lonely Christmas.
My tree I just won't trim.

Where do you hide, my Christmas,
this joyous festive season.
Shine your light upon me,
give my life a reason.

Swaggers all set astride,
ready for the day
while all alone I sit and cry,
for love to come my way.

Underneath the velvet stars;
the cratered moon so high.
I wonder what the sheer night holds.
I scan the open sky.

Where is my treasured Christmas,
a Rockwell theme of yore;
family gathered all around,
glistening lights galore.

Want and greed have sold you out,
your nothing but a show.
No longer lighting up my life,
my Christmas holds no glow.

Are you Showing or Telling?

Joni’s going to write on her blog.

Joni sits at her desk, pencils, paper, stapler and paper clips surrounding her. A deep sigh leaves her mouth as she sits contemplating, ready to tap on the keys preparing to write today’s blog.

Aha! I think I’ll write about SHOW vs. Tell! In the first sentence I told you what Joni was going to do. In the second sentence I SHOWED you.

Showing is more specific in terms as it lays out the picture for you. General terms are good when you need to tell when something is happening that is brief in the story. Whereas, showing moves the story along from point A to point B.

To tell a story, one only needs to say, Mary went to the store. To help in getting the picture across to your reader you need to learn how to SHOW them the story. Mary grabbed her purse hurried out the front door to walk down to the corner store. The screen door slammed as her mother called from behind, “Don’t forget the bread.”

Think of yourself reading a book. You don’t start at the end, you begin at the first page. You take it slowly and read one page at a time so you can grasp the entire picture.

Taken out of context, you can speed read a page here and there but do you fulfill your journey of enjoyment? Showing and telling can give you the same information. But with the showing the reader gets to savor each and every morsel.

Creating a mental picture for the reader is important if you care for them to read to the end. Children love fairy tales where they don’t need a lot of the baggage that comes with imagery, they get picture books. But novels or short stories need to tap into the mental cinema of the reader’s mind.

Telling is fine for trivial things like it was a stormy day. If the storm is essential to moving the story along or part of the immediate scene then showing should be done. Don’t over do it with the imagery so no one says you’re padding your work. Showing should come as a natural flow to you.

I was sad when my dog died.

This is me telling you how I felt.


I was miserable when my dog died. It hurt so much I could just spit. I never expected him to die and now he’s left me alone and lonely for companionship.

This is me padding the telling. You read that my dog died, I hurt, and I feel alone.

Today I was distracted when the puppies in the park were playing frisbee, it reminded me of my Skippy. My friend for life or so I thought, until he contracted a deadly virus that took him from me. No longer do I look at his bowls the same way as they still sit on the floor near the door.

This statement gives more specific details, without telling how I “felt”. You can read in my words that I miss him. You can read my hurt without using the word. You can read that I miss my dog and that I’m hurting just by getting the longing feeling from, “No longer do I look at his bowls.”

The point of "showing" is not to drown the reader in a sea of details. Instead, you should pick out only those details that matter.

Give your reader something to hold onto. Give him a tale of beauty. Save the telling for the hairdresser.