Tuesday, September 21, 2010

The day after...

Pss. 130: 5 I wait for the LORD, my soul doth wait, and in his word do I hope.
I try to go around writing posts about my personal life, but as the years pass life keeps happening in my world and writing my emotions is another way of releasing my feelings out in the cosmos of the virtual world.

Ok, many of you know that we had to go to Omaha (Monday) yesterday. That was a long four hour wind-swept trip to Omaha and another four hour wind-logged trip back. We were going to get the prognosis on my beau’s eyes, to see how healthy his eyes were for surgery to get his sight back.

Two years ago, when all this started we could have used some help from the government to get this surgery, but as days became weeks and weeks became months, we had no help or resources in getting ANY form of treatment. Sure the government offered medicaid with an eight-hundred dollar a month deductible, which would leave us nil in paying rent, but we are expected to take it or leave it.

Thank you America for this freedom!

I know of drug addicts who receive assistance from the state, get their meds to sell to the community, but when some honest person needs help, that person gets overlooked via loopholes.

Anyway, two years have passed and the eyes have taken a beating. With no treatment, (thanks gov) the eyes have deteriorated. Nebraska is not top in the nation of technology, so really their is not much here offered so beau can get his sight back. The left eye has begun its descent into not functioning at all, and the right eye has a 50/50 chance of ever seeing again, and possibly being hit with numerous infections all over again, and the sight being swept away like dust on the floor.

Does he take the chance? Does he go through all the trouble to regain his sight for a month or year, only to lose it again? I can’t answer that for him because this is solely his decision to make, not mine or anyone else for that matter. He’s strong spirited! God has watched over him like a blanket of comfort and as a family we continue to see the bright side. There is a bright side. He’s alive! And I praise God for that!

I will not give up hope! God’s plan is not my plan and I can’t pretend to know what He has in store. Trusting in HIS plan is what faith is all about. Not putting our selfish spin on it and in essence putting our wants and needs before God. I won’t go that route.

I’ll pray, remain a faithful servant, carry on with His wings on my shoulder, and diligently pursue LIFE with HOPE!!! Thank you Father!

Lam. 3: 24 The LORD is my portion, saith my soul; therefore will I hope in him.


June said...

Trusting is what it's all about.

God bless both of you.


joni said...

Thanks June! We're still accepting prayers! :)

June said...

Prayers and thoughts continue your way! :)

joni said...

*big hugs*