Wednesday, December 01, 2010

Off Topic~ Bullies!

Ps.73: 16 When I thought to know this, it was too painful for me;
Adam had a feeling. He didn’t want to go to school on Monday. Was he sick? Does he need a doctor? No, just a feeling. I sent him anyway saying , “Aww you just have to shake it off.” Against my better judgment, I sent him to school.

All day I sat wondering and I anxiously awaited the bus. I can always tell by the way he walks from the bus to the front door whether or not it was a good day. Monday was not a good day. No wave of the arm, no smile, just a sulking boy with his head lowered not to rise until he got to the door.

“What happened?” I asked. “I got sent to the office for self-defending myself!” he unleashed. Now let me tell you, I know mothers always think their son is right and never wrong, but my son is a good kid. When I went to the Parent/teacher meetings, Adam got all good reviews of how well behaved he is, mannerly, polite and respectful. Not a bad thing about his behavior. He even received the ACE award which is for Achievement, Citizenship, and Effort.

So when he told me the story of how he tripped, fell into a kid, and the kid turned and began pushing him, HARD. So he pushed back. What was he supposed to do, stand there and take the bullying? A teacher was a partial witness of the commotion and she overheard the other boy calling Adam an effing b*tch. They were both sent to the office. The perpetrator was taken first.

Adam was the one to look like it was all his fault. The principal called in a ‘witness’ and the poor girl only told what she saw, but she didn’t say Adam tripped, she said Adam was trying to trip the other boy, intentionally. Adam, trying to START something? No, he’s the one always trying NOT to start anything. So the girl didn’t lie but she didn’t see Adam trip, she ASSUMED he was trying to trip and her word was gold to the principal. “Thank you, for telling the truth.” she says. Adam wasn’t allowed to say HIS truth.

So Tuesday, Adam stayed home from school. He now doesn’t want to go back. Gibbon has let him down. What I thought was a Christian community, has turned into everyplace high school. Is this what the schools across the map are all about? Are kids being bullied, fearing for their life each and every day? Are the principal’s in these schools taking the proper precautions in preventing bullying or are the protecting the bully by blaming the victim.

As always, the victim is made to feel more of the victim, and this is hurting kids across America! What is a parent to do? I step in and it continues, nothing is being done, so once again I am stepping in, trying to resolve this so my kid can get the pleasure out of school. One more time and I’m pulling him out and returning to home-schooling.

This morning he rose and went off to school. He said, “I can’t miss my test!” He’s a good kid!! God be with him today and always!

Joel 2: 6 Before their face the people shall be much pained: all faces shall gather blackness.


M. SUE said...

Joni~Could you encourage Adam to, on his own, ask to speak to that principal now that things have cooled down, explain face-to-face, eye-to-eye, that ALL the details were not explained? I would think that a mature individual in a position of power/leadership would respect the brave honesty of a youth coming w/o benefit of parent with him to tell that truth. From your description of Adam, I think he could do it...if he chooses.
Just an idea...Sue

joni said...

Sue ,
Adam did talk to the principal. She didn't believe him. This is a school that is one big clique and Adam is the odd man out.
I will be calling her tomorrow. I haven't spoken to her yet about the matter but she needs to be enlightened.
Would a child, who is being picked on for four months (and not one time pushed back) suddenly intentionally push a bully?

He did go to school today, because the kid LOVES school. :)

I'll keep you updated. :)

Thanks Sue!

M. SUE said...

This is so very wrong! It doesn't add up, does it, Joni...his past achievements (i.e. ACE, plus the reports you received at the PT Meetings...)
I am thankful Adam has you at his back and is willing to share with you.
I am sorry he and you have to deal with this. To be called (inferred) a liar by one in authority lasts a long time. Our high school principal said, "Well, we'll give them the benefit of the doubt," about several of us arriving late by city bus on a heavy snow day. How pompous and smug of him! At 71, I still feel the sting!
Please do keep me posted. Sue

M. SUE said...

P.S. And feel free to quote me on that if you feel it would be helpful! Sue

joni said...

I tried calling today and it must've been some kind of blessing, she wasn't in.

Adam has had two very nice days, no trouble from any one. I think the Superintendent that I spoke to has this totally under control and Adam felt trusting enough to speak to him.

So he does have some on his side at the school.

Thanks Sue. I'm telling ya, this is tough but Adam insists on going to school. He loves it!