Thursday, March 23, 2017

A Thank You To My Friends

Prov. 18:24 "A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother."

I need to send a shout out
To my online family
The dearest thing that I have
Hovering like a canopy

I tell them that I need help
They run to give me aid.
To me they are essential
The BEST thing that God made!

I call these faithful people friends
Even though we’ve never met
They shower me with support
And love I’ll never forget!

I’ve known some for a decade
Other friendships newly formed
I light up when I see their name
Their words have kept me warmed.

They could have left me out here
Without a care in the world
Instead, they share the burden
In this windowed computer world!

They actually care if I live or die
Their pockets turned inside out
These tender bonds we’ll carry
For years to come no doubt!

I sincerely love these friends of mine
Who treat me like one of their own
I’ll never forget the love they gave
Or the Light from God they’ve shown!

THANK YOU for keeping me ALIVE
God Bless Each and every one of you!

A most sincere indebted Thank you to:
Sara Brittany (niece), Flory (cousin)
Becky, Mike, Ben (Jeffrey), Debbie, Dixie,
DonnaS, Heather, Leona, Stena, B.J Gavina (Jim)

And to ALL of my online FB Friends,
too many to name!
Thank you for your continued support!


Tuesday, March 21, 2017

You Only Live Once

1 Chron. 29:13 “Now therefore, our God, we thank thee, and praise thy glorious name.”

You only live once!

I hear this too often from people justifying their unhealthy eating and drinking habits. “Well, you only live once, so I’m going to eat all I can whenever and whatever I want.” But when you get sick and on your deathbed, you don’t realize what you are putting your loved ones through. Was that toxic double burger, with melted cheddar, fried onions, lettuce and tomato worth putting your family through an emotional hell that they have to live with for the rest of their lives?

What’s so ironic is I was never overweight, never thought I had bad eating habits, but here I sit with an illness that many people wouldn’t have the strength or willpower to fight, nevertheless, have their families fight for them. I’ve never gone on a diet in my life, I never colored my hair, heck, I’ve never even been to the beauty parlor in my life. Mani/Pedi? What are those? (I know what they ARE but you get my meaning, I’ve never had the NEED for them.) FYI: I am a self-maintenance woman!

You see, I’ve always been conscientious of what I put into my body so I could live a nice long life for my family. That is why my battle with drugs/alcohol happened at the ripe age of twenty-one. Now here I am, with an illness that has FORCED me to rethink life, and my unhealthy eating habits. What did I eat that was so unhealthy? Pasta, bread, processed meats, canned food, a Pepsi a day, yeah one! And three cups of coffee. I was never a big sweets and dessert person, which I am so glad because this disease would’ve more than likely hit sooner! All foods that turned out to be the toxins eating me away.

Yup, this disease loves sugar and carbs and I’ve eliminated them too late. Or is it in time? We’ll have to see on that one. I have every bit of faith that God and I will nip this thing in the butt and in the meantime I just want to scream from the rooftops, or from this blogosphere, LIFE IS SHORTER THAN YOU THINK, PEOPLE!!!

As my doctor bills mount from what my insurance didn’t cover, I didn’t draw concern because I knew that God in all His Glory assured me that He had this covered, and sure enough, He does!!!! Miracles DO HAPPEN! Every day I wake and praise a Mighty God, trusting Him to carry me through another day and praising Him for waking me to pass through this day. I thank Him every morning I wake up and am grateful to Him for allowing me the opportunity to feel so dadgum good in a world drenched in sickness. I am empowered to be His voice in trying darkened times. 

I’m wondering if you’re all tired of me talking about my unwavering faith and trust in God? Tired of me talking about the toxic lives we live? I can’t help it, friends. The way I see it, some of my words (or links) might provide you with the change you NEED or were looking for but kept putting off because, “Hey, we only live once, I’m going to do what I want and eat what I want and die HAPPY!” Maybe you see me and what I’m going through with vitality and want a bit of what I have. I'll share, I have God, life, energy, and a most humble nature (and the best friends ever.)

Rest assured, I can guarantee if ‘you only live once’ is the way you feel about life, you will NOT die happy. You will be relinquished to a fetal position in some uncaring hospital, allowed to dry up, wither and die, ALONE! But if you have a family, they get to witness your brutal choice of this death scene.

Jam. 5:5 “Ye have lived in pleasure on the earth, and been wanton; ye have nourished your hearts, as in a day of slaughter.”

You see, you live for the pleasure of the day. You don’t think of tomorrow, or your children or grandchildren, you live for you and your happiness. You have the theory ingrained in your head that ‘you only live once’ and that scares me as I think of heaven and it not being as full as people ‘who only live once’ will never have the pleasure of seeing. I hold eternity in my pocket!

I think that’s what makes me different among men (and women), I don’t live for earthly pleasures, I live for one day getting the opportunity to kiss heavens gate and to be welcomed in with open arms.

I have plenty to keep me busy these days around the house to ready myself for spring, like Spring cleaning! Yes, I love this time of year, out with the old, in with the new! I am healing, I am well, and I am LIVING! Living for my God! 
May God reach out to each and every one of you and rain blessings upon you!

Pss. 9:1 “I will praise thee, O LORD, with my whole heart; I will shew forth all thy marvellous works.”

Monday, March 20, 2017

Who Would've Thought

Gen 1:29 "And God said, Behold, I have given you every herb bearing seed, which is upon the face of all the earth, and every tree, in the which is the fruit of a tree yielding seed; to you it shall be for meat."

Who Would’ve Thought?

Who would’ve thought when our mothers were raising us and telling us to ‘eat our vegetables’, that she was really protecting us from the harmful toxins we were putting in our bodies in the process? I bet she didn’t even know why she was telling us other than she knew, ‘vegetables were good for us.’ But she's also the one who used lard for cooking. 

Did you know that the majority of illnesses, MAJORITY of all illnesses are CAUSED from the toxins that we’ve put into our bodies? From Asthma to migraines, from anxiety to depression, from heart disease to cancer, all stem from the toxic food that you and I have put into our bodies and the reaction of illness is from the depletion of healthy antioxidants that aid your immune system in fighting off the enemy of illnesses. What do you think heart disease is caused from? Fats! And type 2 diabetes? For my mother, it was sugar and salt intake.

Drinking water:  


fermented foods

essential oils: 

Cauliflower Pizza:

Welcome to healthy living:

Sauerkraut fighting cancer?:

Reasons to eat Olives! 

The Truth About Cancer and Vit. C:

Who would’ve thought that when we took our first breath, God already mapped out our life? You want an example? This is MY proof that God had all of this planned for me before I was born, read into what you will. 
On March 23rd, Joni was born on her mother’s birthday. The sixth child, the baby of the family.
Vacation Bible School ruled the summers before entering grade school.
As Joni grew, her first thru eighth grade were spent in a Catholic school where she was molded and groomed. Besides intelligence, her religious element was being shaped.
Enter 9th-grade Christian school a fourteen-year-old Christian emerged born again of clay and further shaping took place. 
The writer was born from childhood—way before ninth grade- more like first grade.
Overcame obstacles of an unhealthy lifestyle and life choices with the help of the Lord. Note: The unhealthy foods I ate all of my life are what created the illness I’m fighting today! Also note: Cancer is man made not God made. 
Today, the benefit of being a writer is still shaping who I become later in life. Without the knowledge of doing research (all good writers do research as a part of presenting the TRUTH to the reader), I would not have the willpower to fight this illness that has taken over my body. I would have succumbed to man.

God KNEW I would be a writer and how I’d use it, along with Him, for my complete healing! Knowledge is POWER! 

Who would’ve thought that our beloved government would be the ones poisoning us? Putting fluoride in our drinking water, allowing pesticide-treated crops to be placed on our dinner table, allowing chemically enhanced meat on our grocery shelves, and allowing insurance and pharmaceutical companies to drain every penny of soldiers, elderly, poor and the sick. By the way, THEY (the government) made everyone sick, to begin with! 

Who would’ve thought that God already knew man would destroy man ever so cunningly and that what was going to happen to mankind in the twenty-first century! And the very reason He had it written in scripture the foods we could eat, the bread we could eat, the meat, the vegetables, the herbs, and spices.

Meat to eat KJV: 

For those who need an easier read ERV: 
Shrimp, lobster, crabs anyone?

Even the BEST of Christians (including myself) defy God’s word. 
Lev. 11: 7 “And the swine, though he divide the hoof, and be clovenfooted, yet he cheweth not the cud; he [is] unclean to you.”
Pork, ham, bacon, sausage anyone? 

To make yourself feel better, this is what the New Testament says about meat. To taste heaven, it doesn't matter what we eat or drink. We don't find favor by our acts, in other words, we can't EARN our way into heaven. Maybe the food we eat doesn't matter for our entering heaven but rest assured, it DOES matter whether we live a healthy life or that of an unhealthy lifestyle. And I believe THAT is the reason we were informed in the Old Testament. Again, you will read into it what you will. 

Who would’ve thought that man would be so defiant? Our overweight western nation is proof that man (and woman) is defiant against what the Lord wanted for us, He knew what we’d need to fight the illnesses and what we’d eventually open our eyes and see as truth. Why does He say so many times, you sleeping nation, you sleeping people, AWAKEN????? Because God KNEW thousands of years ago that we were a defiantly defiled bunch!

Who would’ve thought that He’d use this little lady right here, the writer, the blogger, the Godly woman to bring to you a message? God knew that’s who would’ve known. After all, look who He used to pen the scripture.

Sunday, March 19, 2017

Poetry Sunday - My Gift To You

John 14:10 “Believest thou not that I am in the Father, and the Father in me? the words that I speak unto you I speak not of myself: but the Father that dwelleth in me, he doeth the works.”

My Gift To You

God asked me to use the talents
That He had blessed me with
The sharing of the Word I hear
The truth and not a myth.

I sent the Word into the world
A message delivered to me
It was a ripple on the lake
For all the world to see.

The words they entered in my ear
And out of my fingers bled
My gift of writing words to you
Is where my soul was led.

God was pleased when he saw
My talent not gone to waste
The gentle words about His Son
I fed the world a taste.

Some people sit idly by
Saving their earthly treasures
Their talents, gifts and so much more
With all their worldly pleasures.

Rise up you sleeping people
For the new world that awaits
The life that’s left behind you
As you enter heaven’s gates.

Saturday, March 18, 2017

My Inner Strength

2 Sam. 22:33 “God is my strength and power: and he maketh my way perfect.”

My Inner Strength

I remember as a child my sister would always tell my mother, “Let Joni do it, she’s the strong one.” Even now, with this diagnosis, my sister told her daughter, “Joni will beat this, she’s the strong one.” This is the reason I’ve yet to tell my mother anything about this, she’s not the strong one. 

I always felt like my older sister looked up to me because she sees me as the strong one. She always turned to me whenever she had any problems whether physically, emotionally, spiritually, or psychologically. I’m the baby and my family always looked up to ME because I was deemed the strong one, the one looked to in a time of need, the one once depended upon.

That’s a lot of weight for the baby of a family of eight, including my mother and father. I was the one full of courage; the thread that kept the blanket together and when I left the family unraveled one string at a time. They more than likely wouldn’t admit to the downfall of the family to my leaving them but honestly, if they look closely they’d see the total demise coincide with my leaving home.

Job 4:4 “Thy words have upholden him that was falling, and thou hast strengthened the feeble knees.”

I wonder now if I wasn’t led away from home and my family to build up that inner vitality because God knew I would need all my strength for right now, this place and at this time! When God told me to leave all of my possessions behind I did, going to Texas with the clothes on my back and some toys and clothes for my son. 

Looking back now I see God’s handiwork as He molded and shaped each instance to bring about an inner tenacity that I would need for this exact time in my life. He was building a solid palace and what I left behind was a shell of a straw hut. My family had drained me and I needed this stability to carry me through all that I’m enduring now.

Pss. 40:2 “He brought me up also out of an horrible pit, out of the miry clay, and set my feet upon a rock, and established my goings.”

When I was diagnosed I could have crumbled, fell to my knees and allowed the doctors to carry me away in handcuffs and lead me to my death. Instead, I found this amazing inner muscle to stand firm, rise and announce that I was going to heal with the Lord’s handiwork. Was I crazy? What was I thinking? Where on earth did I find the willpower to fight what I deem the strong arm of the law, the doctors? 

Let me tell you, when I was a child I had to fight off sexual predators on a daily basis. I had to fight with superhuman brawniness and stand up to my parents for my faith when they were of a completely opposite religion. When I lost my first child many wanted me to fall; when the Lord and I overcame drug addiction and alcoholism they wanted me to buckle. Depression? Fought and won! I was supposed to do everything the way they were normally done with doctors, medication and follow along in life on a leash like a nice little puppy.

2 Sam. 22:40 “For thou hast girded me with strength to battle: them that rose up against me hast thou subdued under me.”

Instead, I busted through the ashes, I stood with the Rock of my Salvation after fifty years of struggling against what the world wanted me to be, normal. I was in no way normal and I’m not ashamed or embarrassed to make such a statement. Nothing about God or Jesus is normal; nothing about the Omniscient Lord is normal, and I’m honored to not be normal with Him!

So when people look at me and ask where I find the ironclad strength to go on, I tell them, God. Where and how do I stand against what is ‘expected’ of me, God. God has NEVER put a leash around my neck to lead me astray. He’s never fed me lies so that I looked good to the people. He has made me abnormal for all the world to look at, laugh and scoff, and tempt me with lies and feed me the poisons of a system gone wrong.

You might ask why would a loving God do that to a person? So you can SEE Him, all his Healing Power, all His Glory, and all of His Saving grace. He didn’t whip me into submission; I followed Him willingly on my own because I found an inner strength and serene peace there, in His arms. I could have bailed at any time for an easier life but I chose the hard road because the hard road was going to make me STRONG and THIS is where I find my Inner Strength! 
All praise and Glory to God! 

1 Chron. 29:12 “Both riches and honour come of thee, and thou reignest over all; and in thine hand is power and might; and in thine hand it is to make great, and to give strength unto all.”

Thursday, March 16, 2017

The Secret Garden

“If you look the right way, you can see that the whole world is a garden.” 
~ The Secret Garden

The Secret Garden

Last night I chose to watch The Secret Garden. I knew why because it would hit close to home and I needed to see the story again. I’m sure you all know the story of an orphaned girl who was sent to live with her uncle who was never at the one-hundred room mansion that his staff took care of including his hidden son and now his ever present young niece.

There are many renditions of the tale over the years but this one was the now classic 1993 version. Little Colin Craven, Mary’s ten-year-old cousin was sheltered in a room where he was told that he was very ill. Never having been outside he believed he was ill and couldn’t walk.

Mary feeling so alone after her parents’ death, went exploring the manor and discovered a secret garden. With the help of the housemaids’ brother, together they brought the garden back to life.

The story unfolded in an elegant manner as Mary saw through Colin and aided him to see that he was not ill, he could more than likely walk and she’d eventually bring him to his deceased mother's resuscitated garden.

You might be able to see and understand why this hit close to home for me. I was raised to believe that this illness I’ve been diagnosed with is a death sentence. I feel sometimes as if I've been placed in the chambers of this vast mansion, told to stay in my room and believe that I am sentenced to death. 

Usually and ironically it is the older generation, like Mrs. Madlock, who gives off the most negative vibes. I need to do this their way because they KNOW this is what worked for them (and others). Or I need to listen to them because they are my elders. Or, this one tops the cake, you need to let God guide you in the RIGHT direction. Do what??? 

I seriously think that people, unknowingly self-righteous, want to point me in one direction when all along I’ve been going in the direction that MY GOD IS LEADING ME! Yesterday marked seven weeks with the knowledgeable diagnosis of this journey and I have ALWAYS sought God’s guidance through prayer and meditation. I need to ask, in all honesty, is your prayer better than mine? Does God only guide YOU in the right direction and not me because ‘I’m younger’? 

As I see people dissecting the numerous versions of the Holy Bible, I myself have only dissected the King James Version and hold that one close to my heart throughout my life. I don’t go for the ‘easier read’, I go for the complicated read that makes me REALLY intently meditate on every word and its meaning. 

You see, what I’m saying is, what works for you doesn’t work for EVERYONE and you need to be open to the individual path of the youth, the elders, and the in-betweens. We’re all on a different journey and what has worked for you can only be relayed as your experience in the matter, not what will work for an individual in their path. Be open to seeing their version of THEIR journey. 

Yesterday was a somewhat good day. I went shopping with hubby and yet again I amazed myself. I didn’t get dropped off at the front door, I walked in the store and through the store and then back out to the truck. I felt great, I FEEL great! Is someone who has been dealt a devastating blow supposed to feel great? Am I supposed to feel empowered, energized, cheerful, happy, and radiant?

I wonder sometimes if as you read this you think this is some form of denial. Let me assure you, God does not master in trickery and fooling a being into believing one thing while He’s at work crafting a big punch in the face so reality sets in. If that is what your God does to you, it certainly is not what my God does to me.

If God had led me to the chemo route, these blog posts would have gone in a much different direction. With seven weeks of research, numerous doctor visits, two of which were oncologists, and a years worth of prayer on the matter, God is leading me in my HEALING! I am not going this alone and I’m not listening to those around me who try to sway me with their ‘sage advice’. 

Last night was the first time in a long time that I had a bad nights sleep. I find that when you sleepwalk to the bathroom in the middle of the night, it’s hard to shut off the negative voices all clamoring for a place in your head. So, much of the night I was wrestling demons. I guess I’m allowed my bad nights. 

Today I awoke and saw the world as a garden, ripe and ready to be groomed. The warmer weather is smacking us in the face this week, the fields are bursting with activity as farmers get a head start on preparing their fields for crops, and the Crane are awake and singing their tune.

I’m fighting a winning battle and your support, prayer and positive affirmations are welcome in my world. If you, a believer or not, have a negative insight as to what God is doing in my life, please, keep it to yourself as I have MANY surrounding me in belief and support in the way I should go.

As Lord Archibald Craven was summoned prayerfully, in the only way some children know how to pray, back to the mansion he was shocked to see his son walking outside in the Secret Garden, healthy and ALIVE with Mary and her friend. All embraced the BEAUTY of LIFE! Even if the Secret Garden is only in my mind, it is a beauty in the world that I embrace! Live, love, see and be awakened now. May God bless each and every one of you. 

Pss. 96:6 KJV “Honour and majesty are before him: strength and beauty are in his sanctuary.”

Tuesday, March 14, 2017

Fear Tactics Used

Beauty in the dark. Concordia, Kansas

1 Sam. 22:23 “Abide thou with me, fear not: for he that seeketh my life seeketh thy life: but with me thou shalt be in safeguard.”

Fear Tactics Used

From day one, January 25 was riddled in fear tactics. Now I'd like the doctors to know what it felt like rushing me from one test to the other in tears, telling me I have a dreaded disease but, ‘we’ll be with you all the way,’ is all they offered and I haven’t seen one of them since the 25th of January.

Couldn’t the doctor have sent me straight for the biopsy? Why did I need a mammogram, CT scan, blood test AND a biopsy to confirm my diagnosis, all in one day? I’ll tell you why, to elicit fear. The BC doctor used fear the very first day by forcing me into a whirlwind of tests in my confused weakened state. I was told I had a dreaded disease then shuffled around like meat in a slaughterhouse.

That was their tactic from the get-go and it became obvious with the onc. #1 visit. She was full of the words you need to instill fear. Onc. #2 was an intimidating, overbearing older man and he knew what he was doing too. Instill fear in this little lady and she’ll be eating out of the palms of our hands like the fragile bird that she is. When onc. #2 called onc. #1 autistic, I knew something was wrong with these people’s minds. Name calling, really?

What they weren’t counting on was this fragile looking flower being one of the strongest people they more than likely will ever meet! The people they meet are scared and rightly so, they have been told all of their life that this illness will kill and maim them, so we’re going to poison your system and it will make you all better. Oh no wait, they don’t use the word poison. They use words like life or death. This will cure you. You’ll live. 

I still can’t figure that one out how poison cures. How can poisoning your body heal you? When you ask about the poison, they colorize the version. Like going from black and white to rainbows. When you question the poison and the damage it causes, they stumble to search for the right words to hook you. There’ll be no damage, your body will heal and repair from the toxins. Did you know that one spill of the juice, that is marked with skull and crossbones, can kill the administering person of the toxins? This is what they want to put in your veins, people!

When you suggest alternate routes they are adamant that this is a life and death situation and you need this poison! Even though later in life after you’re ‘healed’ you’ll be hit with Alzheimer’s, bronchitis, emphysema, you name it, a host of illnesses await you after the chemo route. You have no immune system to fight at this point. 

You know, I haven’t cried since I saw onc. #2. There is a pattern to my days of crying. The BC doctor visit, the onc. #1 visit, and the onc. #2 visit. Hmm, interesting. Why did they instill so much fear that I left in tears and WANTING to die? Don’t worry folks, I rebounded with a good nights sleep each time and woke rejuvenated in the hands of the Lord WANTING to live.

When I tell the doctors that I want to do this or that, they shrug it off and say no, no, no, you need US! You need chemotherapy and that is the only thing you need to get through this. I’ve read, witnessed, saw too much to take their word for it so thus I began my research. 

And here I am, feeling the best I’ve ever felt, twelve pounds lighter (unintentional, mind you) from healthier eating! I’m putting my mind at peace, my body is responding and there is a healing going on, on so many levels. I want to go back in a year, two years, five years and say to the doctors, here I am, still! 

Healing my mind, body, and soul, one step at a time. Now many who know me, knows I haven’t spoken to anyone in my family (besides my mother), since 2015 when my dad passed away. Not because of animosity, it's just that’s the way we are, we go our own way, and we’re fine with it. Well this weekend was my sisters’ birthday and I called her, kind of shocked her but it was like we had been speaking all these years. We still love each other and that's all that matters. 

I feel like I need to let them know I love them, whether they care for me or not, I care for them. The next step will be calling my brother and asking to do a Skype chat with my mother. That will really excite her to SEE me! She is not tech savvy and the tablet my brother bought her to use just sits in a wasteland.

Tomorrow marks seven weeks since the diagnosis. I’m still on my no sugar diet, and my target each day is zero carbs, but the most I get in an entire day is maybe five. I’ve allowed to my healing diet free-range vegetarian fed chickens eggs, two to be exact, for breakfast. The first two weeks were JUST veggies, and now I allow fruit and only the alkaline fruit that I NEED to beat this worm that has taken up residence in my body.

I am up to about fourteen supplements a day. As some may worry that these supplements might be toxic to my system, please understand, your prescribed drugs are more toxic than any God-given vitamin and herb and yes, four doctors are aware of what I’m using. You know what the doc’s say about the supplements I’m using? That I won’t need them if I go the healing-by-chemo-poison-my-system route because chemo heals everything! What they don’t add is what chemo KILLS! There are zero deaths from turmeric, vit. C, vit. D and such.

The supplements I use are not the mass manufactured at WalMart brand, I seek out the purest of vitamins and supplements and if you’re buying a supplement to aid in your healing, if it is mass produced you can pretty much be sure they have the toxic –oxides, colors, dyes and preservatives that are of no help to your healing of whatever it is you’re taking supplements for. Read the labels!!!

I think what I’ve unintentionally done is put the shoe on the other foot, so to speak. When I tell the doc’s I’m going it alone, they are gripped with fear because they know no other healing than what they’ve been taught scientifically. They don’t know the power of the Lord, the powerful healing that goes along with prayer, they cannot comprehend giving your life up for what they deem a fantasy man.

I live every day to wake up, breathe in the air, feel the warmth of the sunshine on my face and walk the path of healing. Do you honestly think that is what doctors and scientists do? Most people just wake to face another daunting day, to work, eat and sleep. They miss all of the powerful elements of beauty, prayer, spiritual and physical healing in between. They basically live to die, I LIVE to LIVE! Alleluia Amen! 

2 Peter 1:5-8 KJV “And beside this, giving all diligence, add to your faith virtue; and to virtue knowledge; And to knowledge temperance; and to temperance patience; and to patience godliness; And to godliness brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness charity. For if these things be in you, and abound, they make you that ye shall neither be barren nor unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ.”

Sunshine Award

Sunshine award