meet Spidey, my 13-yr.-old houseplant
Pss. 64:1 “Hear my voice, O God, in my prayer: preserve my life from fear of the enemy.”
I’ve been telling you about my emails targeting me? Well this morning’s email, once again, gave me a God-slap moment. It came right out and basically said, ‘stuff it’! Okay, it didn’t tell me to stuff it, that’s what it said I’m doing with my emotional baggage instead of surrendering the juice of the problems up to God.
I figured the reason a person likes reading my blog is that they connect with my blunt honesty of any given subject. I really try not to sugarcoat anything I’m experiencing; I lay it all out there for you to read. So why am I being told that I’m really stuffing my emotional baggage when it comes to God? I’m supposed to be getting rid of it all so I can heal, remember? Total surrender, remember?
Apparently, I’ve been stuffing it! I loved this line in my Bible Gateway email by Amy Carroll, she said it was a famous punch line so I’m not stealing it from her.
“Denial isn’t just a river in Egypt.”
There it is. I think I’m surrendering my emotional baggage all to God but really it’s a form of denial when I suppress the meat of the problem. God doesn’t want the orange; He wants the juice, pulp and all! He doesn’t want a lamb chop, He demands the entire Lamb! Wow!
In other words, God doesn’t want our artsy fartsy lifestyle laid before Him, like our religiously reading of the Bible, our attending church, getting everything scripturally right, or our loving thy neighbor. Yes, these things are all well and good, but God wants our pains, the heart, the soul of man and all of the ugly portions, not just the package wrapped up neatly with a bow! We never give Him what keeps us awake at night, we give him our day, we give him all the cute parts that we think He’ll enjoy seeing from us.
I may read too much into things these days but the accuracy is chilling. Another example, I received my Neck Traction Device. An email came with a picture stating it had been delivered, but there was something missing from my purchase that I didn’t know I was supposed to get (maybe that free item had expired), there was a silk mask. You know the kind, the ones that gently go over your eyes for a better nights rest? It hides the light so you can sleep better. I didn’t get one. I thought, now I know why, I’m already wearing one! I may already have the Light in me, but I hide the rest thinking He can’t see the mush that’s still there. He let me know, HE SEES IT ALL!
Think of it like this. You are baggage on a conveyer belt at the airport, before you can go on to your next destination, you need to be scanned by an x-ray so you don’t get anything over on ‘the powers-that-be’. The one time I went on a plane I was a little surprised my pen that hides a very pointy letter opener inside, made it through the x-ray, the rifling of my purse, the checks and double checks, but my underwire bra set off the beep on the scanning process!
You see how I over think things? I’m thinking I’m baggage being scanned and everything is exposed but still, there is that ever so small portion that is hidden inside that might not be detected. I’m telling you, know that God is seeing your hidden emotional baggage! He detects it all. He knows when you’re giving it all to Him and when you’re hiding a small portion. Stop being so selfish and share the very depths of your being with Him; ALL of it!
How do we fix it? Well, it sounds like a tedious chore is at hand but I may be making a mountain out of a molehill. I don’t think so. I seriously have work to do especially if I’m ever to be fully healed and rid of this lingering disease. First, I’m adding to my much-needed break. I need this time to look at the whole picture and reassess the ever-long journey I’ve placed myself on. And yes, I’ve taken quite a few breaks in the past forty days but for the wrong reasons. I have a renewed purpose. Don’t read too much into it, my breaks may not be what you’re thinking they mean. REST! I need rest and reassessment!
Psalm 62:5 says, “Yes, my soul, find rest in God; my hope comes from him” (NIV)
Second, I will strengthen my stance by surrendering everything to God and allow Him to be my rock when I’m unbalanced and trying to walk. I’m inviting Him to a feast and I’m not serving up toxic food in the form of a pig or just a spare rib, no, I’m offering him the entire lamb for sacrifice on the x-ray table so he can see the whole me.
Pss. 62:6 “He only is my rock and my salvation: he is my defence; I shall not be moved.”
Third finding shelter in His arms as the tears begin flowing downstream releasing denial into the river in Egypt. I am healed by His blood, I am strong in His arms, I am protected by his Light!
Pss. 62:8 “Trust in him at all times; ye people, pour out your heart before him: God is a refuge for us. Selah.”
I can tell you’re all intrigued by this journey of mine. If only to see my success because you’re a dear friend or a person who just needed a little spark to reassess their life. I’m your go-to person! Whatever you do, don’t tell me to just stuff it because I’ll tell you to get out of your own denial and unpack. You're home and now is the time to make sure your bag is empty so you can go to the REAL home that awaits you to be delivered.
All praise and Glory to God!