Flower of Effort ~ A Mother's Day poem for ME

Ezek.: 19:10 "Thy mother is like a vine in thy blood, planted by the waters: she was fruitful and full of branches by reason of many waters."

Flower of Effort

copyright © Adam Zipp

Rainbows over a sun settled sea

Gardens flowing in an effortless breeze

Time forever changing

We ask ourselves what it means to be

Similar to a tree

Trunk so tall and thick

Bark as tough as brick

Growing in an open field

A spot that's hard to pick

Stoic and unmoving

Green and forever growing

Not everyone can be such a powerful thing

Some must settle to grow as a flower

To make up for their lacking in power

Through effort and courage

To withstand the weather

And the cold that comes in November

To understand the effort

Know what lies beneath the dirt

A mask to cover the pain and hurt

Rain softens the soil

That brings the flower its comfort

In trying times

Be like the flower

with wind blowing chimes

Signs of future rain showers

So spread your petals and let them climb

No one could be prouder.

~~~~    *  ~~~~

No need to rip this apart with crits. This was my loving Mother's Day gift from my son, who happens to be following in m footsteps as a writer and poet and I couldn't be more proud!

Thank you, Adam! I love you!

Poetry Sunday ~ Autumn's Score

Rev. 22:2 “In the midst of the street of it, and on either side of the river, was there the tree of life, which bare twelve manner of fruits, and yielded her fruit every month: and the leaves of the tree were for the healing of the nations.”

Autumn’s Score

One by one they fell 

Lifeless where once alive

No more life in hell

From the tree, they dive.

Spiraling without sound

Swept away by wind

Falling to the ground

The veins therefore rescind

Leave the tree so bare

Vitality now within

Gone without a care

The barren knows no sin.

Stoic bark and beauty

Asleep the life no more

Thumbprint lasting duty

Spring is autumn’s score.

Overwhelmed? Take it to God!

Blizzard of 2009

talk about overwhelming

1 Peter 5:7 (NIV), “Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.” 

Overwhelmed

Have you ever been overwhelmed? Here lately my pain has overwhelmed me to the point of frustration and I don’t like that part of me, angry Joni.  The holiday took more out of me than I thought; I felt exhausted, tired and just totally done with the world. So what did I do, I took a time of rest! Something slashed me right across the face; maybe it was the 26 degrees below zero wind chilling temps?

While I love the cold I cannot and will not embrace extremely bitter, skin scarring, back biting cold. The winds alone feel like little shards of glass being plunged into your skin and any part of you that is exposed will surely freeze on impact and bleed when you thaw, so I stayed inside. While I consider myself somewhat of a recluse, the walls begin to close in on you and smother you in the bitterness of the season.

Top that off with a chronic pain and you have a recipe for disaster waiting to spin out of control and spit in the face of anyone that gets in your path. I try not to allow my pain to get that out of control and what is my saving grace? Well God of course. Prayerful meditation.

I realize that when people become so overwhelmed with say (snow) work, classes, bills, pain; their ability to fight is hidden and they shut down and give in to the ‘okay, you win’, worry and stressing about the overwhelming event, if you can call it that. It is what it is and that is LIFE. 

The only way that the events in life stop is if we die, and well, we don’t want that to happen, so what do we do? We deal with everything on a daily basis, sometimes by the seconds of the day and we need our prayerful meditations to just snuggle us tightly and get us through our life event. 

You know how people have huge walk-in-closets where they store everything but the kitchen sink? Yeah, I don’t have one of those. And then there are some smaller more reasonably sized closets; yeah I don’t have one of those either. Then there are the broom closets where you pack all of your junk in there until the walls are about to explode; yeah, I have one of those!

I’m telling you now, the bigger the closet the more problems of being overwhelmed you’ll encounter. People tend to hoard their life in a walk-in-closet when they only have a pantry size cupboard, that is when the overwhelming sneaks up on you and you burst. What to do? Take it to God and leave it in his mansion. He has plenty of room but you know what, He doesn’t store your problems or hide them or pile them back on top of you when you least expect it, nope He carries your junk effortlessly to the shores and places them by the sea. You see where I’m going with this? 

Have you ever watched waves crash on the shores? I remember when I was small we used to go to Ocean City, Maryland. I’d build sandcastles right close to the water but not too close for the waves to come and wash my beautiful creation away. By nightfall, the tide had moved in and my sandcastle became a part of the sea, no longer a part of me. 

That is what happens to our problems when we take them to God instead of storing them in our closets. He places them at the waters edge and it takes very little time for the hoarded problems to wash away. 

The other night I had a dream, one where our landlord came to the house for an inspection. The first thing he did was looked in our closets and started moving stuff around telling me that this closet needs to be organized. I woke with the overwhelming sensation of needing (no not cleaning out my closets!) but to organize my problems and prepare to load them up and take them to where God was standing and waiting for me to unload the accumulated junk in my life.(worries, problems, pain, stress) 

Sometimes we wait for a deadline to come upon us then turn to God when we should have been turning to God all along. We might think, ‘oh this is just a small problem (whether it is pain, bills, a dilemma) that we can handle on our own’, but we soon realize via the intensity, we’ve stuffed our closet to the max and there is no room. 

I’ll be the first to admit that I’ve taken so much to God that I feel I overwhelm HIM and can handle the small things on my own. Boy, was I ever wrong! Like I said, He has a mansion the size of an ocean to store your problems, to Him they are but a grain of sand. Have you ever seen a grain of sand? To me, it is smaller than a grain of salt. To Him, my problems must be smaller than a grain of sand!

Don’t be afraid to take the small stuff to Him. Allow him to organize that closet to where your little pantry looks like a humongous walk-in closet upon opening and allow the sea breeze to swiftly wash over your face lifting your hair in a whoosh to carry your problems away.

It’s that simple, take your overwhelming worries to God. Don’t hoard the small stuff either, it just clutters the closet. ;) 

Matt. 6:6 “But thou, when thou prayest, enter into thy closet, and when thou hast shut thy door, pray to thy Father which is in secret; and thy Father which seeth in secret shall reward thee openly.”

Change is Coming

Isaiah 26:9 (NIV)

My soul yearns for you in the night; in the morning my spirit longs for you. When your judgments come upon the earth, the people of the world learn righteousness.

Change is Coming

Change is coming in the air like a veiled morning fog. I can see it in the spiraling leaves being swept by the wind. I can feel it in the temperatures ever changing with the season. I can smell it blowing in the air the sweet scent of change that will wash over me as a waterfall.

I felt the change coming and I wanted it to be swift but as you know, my plans are not Gods plans and here I sit today on my 201st post of the year as I barrel toward my 203rd goal of posts so I can rest. After this post, I will end with Quotation Saturday and Poetry Sunday, then be on my way to Holy day. I’ve watched as my stats flew through the roof this year and as I love my supportive friends very much, facebook was not the only source that had me soaring. 

I’ve had to bear a lot this year as people have either liked or disliked what I’ve said and it’s been an interesting year tolerating what all of you have either said or not said. Now it is my turn to reflect on me not what others do or say or how they acted and reacted. It has been a year of scars and blemishes by people knowingly or unknowingly saying things that cut me and now I must go and heal. The New Year cannot come without my healing taking place. 

I tried to stay away from Social Media when it got too bad, the news when it got too loud, and the world when it got too hard. I’ve seen friends disappear and new friends emerge. All in all the year has been good to me, pain wise and otherwise, I’ve survived.

I feel like a lone wolf who’s been caught in a bear trap, freed and released to wander in the wilderness among the animals of the forest. Sorry humans, for relinquishing you to the animal species, but I have not seen much humanistic display this year; I’ll have to dig and look back to see if any existed.

I won’t get back to you on that because the change calls for me to find a nice cove to hibernate in peeking out only to retrieve nourishment to sustain me through the winter. Nourishment to my soul can only be found one way and it isn’t anywhere connected to a screen and keyboard. 

I have some serious health issues to contend with in the coming new year but I’m not at liberty to go into anything before the holiday season. Maybe that will be my new year blog beginning seeking out people who relate to what I’m experiencing but for now, my little semi-hibernation cove will have to do. 

My Thanksgiving will be spent in thankfulness with my husband. We’re not going to have a humongous meal like in prior years just something simple where we have plenty of leftovers for the next day, not the next month. My son will have to work on turkey day from nine to five so it will be a bit different by not having him in the house as my helper. 

I know what you’re thinking, working on Thanksgiving Day? Well, he’ll be out of a job in a couple of weeks because of the store closing down so he’s trying to make all the money he can to prepare for the interim of joblessness. As of December 2, he’ll have been there five months and the young man has worked his heart out in those five months, so I can put away any selfishness I have in wanting him home as I find a new way of life in the empty nest.

I’ll also be preparing for new ventures in the coming year so during this holiday season I’ll be enjoying the breathing room necessary to carry me through the lone wolf syndrome. May you enjoy the sights, sounds, aromas, tastes and magnificent wonders of a Holy Season and always remember when you’re feeling selfish, greedy, and prideful that Jesus sacrificed His life for you so you would think of others before yourself. 

God Bless You ALL!

1 Timothy 6:6-10 (NIV)

But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it. But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that. People who want to get rich fall into temptation and a trap and into many foolish and harmful desires that plunge men into ruin and destruction. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs.

Poetry Sunday ~ The Path

Pss. 17:5 Hold up my goings in thy paths, that my footsteps slip not.

***

The Path I Take

***

As curious winds dance about

snow lay at my feet

swirling in my mind is doubt

for all the world to meet.

Take my hand and walk me through

the life that has a muddled hue.

Swift soft whispers of the day

spin my life around

stellar are the stars I see

they lift me off the ground.

Hold me now for I am weak

my Father’s face, do I seek.

Step lightly as you pass.

on wilted willow's bough;

Windows open, breath falls in

I’m here amongst you now.

He breathes new life into me

I share for all the world to see.

Originally posted:11 21 10

The one I wrote for today was

too dark.

Miracles Do Happen!

Pss. 40:3 (KJV) “And he hath put a new song in my mouth, even praise unto our God: many shall see it, and fear, and shall trust in the LORD." 

Miracles Do Happen

Five years ago my husband regained his eyesight. You might say it was the doctor who did the cornea transplant but it was way more than just a doctor that put the entire puzzle together to make it work; no, there was a miracle involved from a Higher Power, that’s right, God!

I don’t think blindness is anything you or I could take on easily, sure maybe we think we could but do a test, put a blindfold on for a day and try walking, showering, eating, cooking, all the things we take for granted become magnified.

My hubby went blind gradually, I knew the day he called and asked me to drive him to work after his attempt failed, something he’d done effortlessly for the six years we lived in Texas. The night before, we had been hit with a straight-line wind storm. If you don’t know what that is, it is not much unlike a tornado but forecasters designate it straight line winds because no funnel clouds are present, but the winds are disastrous.

With downed power lines, misplaced roofs and debris scattered in the roads, detours were everywhere making my hubby’s trek into work more difficult; he called me. Fast forward a few weeks and a doctor visit showed he was in need of cornea transplant surgery, again. This time the need was more serious because both eyes were in need and failing. Now jobless and no insurance we needed help, a miracle if you will.

Texas was no longer an option, as the extra help we desperately needed would never come. We had to move to Nebraska where his loving family was and we’d make a new start, blind, penniless, and basically homeless we arrived in Nebraska to the help we needed and then some! 

His family was immensely helpful in this transition from his brother, sister-in-law, and nephew, all missing work and coming to Texas to load us up for the move, to the family in Nebraska waiting to unload us when we arrived. When we finally did arrive, there was food in the cupboards (donated by his mom’s church Gibbon Baptist) as well as an envelope full of money for the basic necessities we’d need. 

Would this blessing train end there? Of course not; month after month for two and a half years the blessings poured in like a dam had burst! The only minor setback was Medicare saying he’d have to be blind for two years before they would pay for a cornea transplant. Well, that’s not too bad you might say but let me remind you, during these two years his corneas were continuing to deteriorate.

When I’m told to patiently wait on the Lord, I’m reminded that everything is in His time and not MY time. I wanted this blindness over and done with now not in two years, but we waited; sometimes patiently and sometimes not so much. By the time we finally received the Medicare we were comfortably accepting he may never be seeing again. Finding a doctor was a challenge because hubby wanted to listen to his mother and uncle when I was clearly pointing him in the right direction. But it took two refusals from other doctors for him to finally go to the doctor I picked in the very beginning.

The doctor was perfect, the transplant was perfect his sight was restored but his one eye was too far gone (thanks, medicare!) and he had to have it removed. A blessing, you ask, to lose an eye? Well, let me tell you, the good eye that received the cornea was being infected over and over because of the bad eye. Do you lose both eyes or lose one eye and keep the good one? Think about that. 

This is where the many, eight-hour round trips to Omaha were doing damage to my back. Sitting for hours, sometimes in high winds or thunderstorms and driving for eight hours with tiny stops, sometimes twice or three times a week did my back in and I lost my ability to walk normal. Was it worth it? I would do it over again in a heartbeat! The miracle of sight is more important than my petty walking ability.

His mother said she could make the trip to Omaha in two hours (remember she LIVES here in Nebraska and has made the trip NUMEROUS times) I’m a native Baltimorean coming from Texas and not used to HIGH winds and doing seventy-five miles per hour to somewhere I’ve never been. So, I let her take him one time and yeah, it took her about six hours. (not four)

The damage to my back was done; no return and I sometimes feel bitter when someone says, “Oh the problem was there all along.” Maybe it was but the long driving spells were what irritated my back enough to finally fail, and that’s the truth of the matter! I’ve lived it and we survived it and the miracle I’m still here and he is still seeing is a package of wrapped blessings with all the frilly bows and ribbons on top!

You could say that this was all coincidence that everything worked out the way it did but I’ve NEVER believed in coincidence. Everything down to the letter happened the way it was supposed to happen and for a reason. Miracles DO happen! I wait with patience to unravel the bows to see the reason although I have faith everything was for the best.

In the midst of heartache and heartbreak we can never see the reason for anything but once you stand back and look at the full picture instead of looking at an unsolved puzzle, you’ll see the beautiful landscape of truth and reason unfold into a blessed miracle.

Heb. 2:4 “God also bearing them witness, both with signs and wonders, and with divers miracles, and gifts of the Holy Ghost, according to his own will?”

Poetry Sunday ~ I See Him

Eph. 3:3-4 “How that by revelation he made known unto me the mystery; (as I wrote afore in few words, Whereby, when ye read, ye may understand my knowledge in the mystery of Christ)

I see Him in the light of day
I see Him in the clouds that sway
I see Him in the breeze He breathes
I see Him in the soul that seethes

    

                                             

I hear Him in the songs of praise

I hear Him in intuitive ways

I hear Him in the reprimand

I hear Him in the Promised Land

I touch Him in my daily need

I touch Him in diurnal deed

I touch Him with my active prayer

I touch Him with each wisp of air

I taste Him in the scented dew

I taste Him in His words so true.

I taste Him in the daily bread

I taste Him in the cross He bled

I see, hear, touch and taste

The scent of Him in honor placed

For all I see and all I do

It is my God I share with you!

God Bless you all

20 BLIZZARD 16

 

Pss. 55:8 “I would hasten my escape from the windy storm and tempest.”

Winter came in like a lamb. We had mild temps all throughout December and January. Nebraska wasn’t the only place that had mild temps, even back in Baltimore they were boasting of an uneventful mild winter until… the Blizzard of 2016 that is!

The term blizzard is defined as:
a storm with dry, driving snow, strong winds, and intense cold.
a heavy and prolonged snowstorm covering a wide area.

Baltimore was hit with 30 inches of snow and left the kids out of school for an entire week. This blast of snow looks to be Nebraska’s big storm of the year. We’re due a hefty 14 inches! If my husband didn’t have to work outside in this stuff, I’d probably enjoy the beauty of the falling snow a little bit more. But he does have off today and tomorrow so my heart and prayer goes out to anyone who has to be out in this storm.

When we first moved here to Nebraska, we were hit with TWO blizzards back to back dumping 24 inches of snow both times! So now you know where all of my back problems began to surface. Now seven years later the wintertime is nothing to write home about. I won’t call it anything but a mild winter.

I knew Baltimore was going to be hit hard when I heard the term ‘Snowpocalypse’ and ‘Snowmageddon’ but namely when I heard they NAMED the storm, Jonas! When did they start naming winter storms? Goodness! 

I think they name the storms for the severity they expect, like this one that is hitting Nebraska they named Kayla. Well that’s not a life-threatening name. The thing about this one is that it is a very WET snow and has it clinging like wet napkins to everything in its path! The winds are howling, the snow is flying horizontally and the house trembles at every gust. 

I was up very early and it looked deep out there but the worse is yet to arrive or so they say and from the looks of it, I’d say they nailed this one! I’m sure I’ll have more pictures as the day rolls along. I’ve been up since 5:30 snapping shots in the dark until the light came and now… it is even DEEPER!

I want to run out and make a snow angel! Maybe later when I try to get my dog out there to do her business, if my back allows. Other than that the day is definitely a stay-inside-cook-and-enjoy-the-view kind of day. Cocoa anyone? 

More pics to come later as the storm rages on

early morn

Assessing the Damage

Acts 1: 7 And he said unto them, It is not for you to know the times or the seasons, which the Father hath put in his own power.

After this weekend and the nasty storms, it was time to assess the damage. We had winds I know topping the 70 mile mark and they were sustained winds which meant they did not pause between gusts.

I knew we were crazy to do our planting in May but I was getting antsy. It’s planting season by May right but nothing about this year has been normal weather wise. While some were saying this was a harsh winter here in Nebraska because we had a few nights that dipped down to 20 below, yes, that’s 20 below zero!

I say it WASN’T harsh because I remember a few days in December where Steven was still wearing shorts to work. Then a cold spell would hit then back up to the 70’s. We had no back-to-back blizzards as we had had back in 2009 when we moved up here from Texas. We barely had any snow at all this year.

A harsh winter would have rendered my perennials dead, as in the other years, but not this year. This year my perennials and trees showed signs of life in late February early March. It would dip down in the 30’s and bounce back to the sixties and it did that for a month, so I assumed spring was on the way, the calendar said so, right?

Now anyone who knows me, knows I absolutely LOVE winter, but when springtime surfaces it’s as if a bug has bitten me and infects me with the getting outside and assessing the gardens. But working in the cold and sweating and the wind gusting and blowing your hair all over the place is really no fun. It kind of takes away any springtime planting joy.

I despise summer. Yes, despise! Have you ever baked a potato to an excess and it shrivels? That is what summer is to me, time to bake and shrivel. Not much more enjoyment for me other than sitting in my house and watching the birds and creatures on the farm go about their summer business. I’m relinquished to the house. The heat has a negative affect on my body and some days I can’t even move!

For some reason, people are under the impression summer is the time to walk around half naked and expose their body. I saw one girl walk into WalMart in a bathing suit. It IS WalMart mind you and that is where you can see just about ANYthing and everything, but seriously? A bathing suit?

To the best of my recollection, we have four seasons. In February, people were wearing shorts (in all that eagerness to expose their bodies) and two days later they were wearing their parka!

May 15^th. That is the day I was waiting for. It is supposed to be the date where it is safe to do planting because nighttime temps should be safely above 65 degrees; should be anyway. Here it is June 19^th at 6 in the morning and it is a pleasant 60 degrees. We’ve had a FEW mornings where we were above 65, but a few to me is three. Yeah, that’s about it. Spring never arrived. It was either summer or winter, but never spring.

Anyway, by May 15^th we were ready to plant! We did some tilling, got the soil ready, and planted two rows of tomatoes and two rows of peppers, I went around the outside of the house planting Marigolds and Zinnia’s, my Hosta’s and Hollyhocks had surfaced and we were well on our way, right? Wrong!

We had quite a few cold nights at the end of May (some 40’s and 50’s) and I lost a few marigolds, and the tomatoes were hanging in there along with the peppers. Then the Saturday storm hit and hit pretty hard too.

Assessing the damage. The Hollyhock leaves were shredded with nary part of the leaves clinging to the stems. Marigolds were bent over and the flowers were laying inches away from the mother stem. I had a sunflower growing and all that was left standing was a stem, all the leaves were ripped from the stem.

Sunday, Monday and Tuesday was spent raking out the gardens of all the leaf debris that had fallen from the surrounding trees, and assessing the damage to the tomatoes and peppers and the newly sprouts of the Peach trees.

Survival. Truly I got a taste of what was meant by only the strong survive. A bitter taste but a taste nonetheless. I saw as leaves clung to the branches of my plants. I saw the stems standing strong after being whipped through the winds. I saw trees standing as if laughing saying, “You didn’t get ME.”  I witnessed the birth of a seedling rising out of the moistened soil. I saw life, new life going on and facing the days in the sun.

We’ve had a 95 degree day and 60 degree mornings. We’ve had rain, we’ve had loss and all that I gather from the entire experience is that there IS life after devastation. It may change perspective for you but you tend to see it all differently this thing called life.

As the Salvia sprouts new blossoms, as the Hollyhocks reform new leaves, as the Marigold releases new buds, as flowers form on the tomato and pepper plants, I see new life being shaped and formed by the devastating blows.

Ever the optimist, in assessing the damage, I see new life. I see all my plants going on and becoming stronger. I see anew spirit coming alive in my garden. They are all singing praises and lifting up their flower to the Lord chanting, “We will survive!” Until the next storm that is, when they get to do it all over again.

1 Chron. 29:12 Both riches and honour come of thee, and thou reignest over all; and in thine hand is power and might; and in thine hand it is to make great, and to give strength unto all.

Poetry Sunday ~ A Vital Season

Pss. 92:13 Those that be planted in the house of the LORD shall flourish in the courts of our God.

A Vital Season

The chirping of the birds awake

The chimes ring out in tune.

The morn has come and I’m alive

Praise God my morning croon.

The trees are showing color

Leaves dance with vitality

Wind is brisk the lulling sound

Sings loudly out to me.

Winter sleeps, as grass turns green

The season bursts with vigor

I sit in awe of God’s own hand

That touches the seedling trigger.

A vibrant season stands before us

Now’s our chance to flourish.

Speak to the wind, sing out God

Allow the journey to nourish.

Eph. 5: 29 For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:

The WINDS of Change

“The trouble is not really in being alone, it's being lonely. One can be lonely in the midst of a crowd, don't you think?”
~ Christine Feehan

Waving Hi, from the windy state of Nebraska. Sure Chicago can claim “the Windy City” but I am here to unofficially lay claim to the name Windy State of Nebraska! As weather forecasters will lie to you and say, it’s going to be breezy, I’m here to say, 25mph sustained WINDS with gusts to 45mph does not make it ‘breezy’; where I come from (Baltimore, Md.) that is downright WINDY!

The winds have been sustained for more than a week now, I’m sure of that, which hinders any time in the garden even though I’m loving the cool temps. Last week we had record-breaking heat with temps reaching 97 and in some places 100-104! A few days before that we had SNOWFALL and today it is struggling to reach 60!

These crazy weather shifts gives rise to tornadoes and some storm-wreaking havoc. It’s made me think of the winds of change sweeping over my life as well as this lovely state of Nebraska. Living out here in isolation – yes, a closed down turkey ranch with one other house is sheer isolation for me. While I love the beauty, solitude and quietness of the place, it sure can elicit a solid empty feeling of loneliness.

An overly friendly person I am, who sees the outside physical world maybe once every two or three weeks (that being a trip to the food store or church, twenty miles away from my house) can sometimes feel the isolation as smothering. This is where my writing garden comes into play. And to think ten years ago I never TOUCHED a computer, I have now taken up one of my beau’s famed addictions and that is, life on the computer!

In this windowed world, there is no wind! There is a collage of friendships to be had and thus I find myself clinging to the writing world and the sites that have anything to do with writing, and the daily dose of facebook, mind you.

THIS is why I chose to dive headfirst into f2k again. Even IT has taken on the winds of change. Once a free writing course, now a FEE writing course, which will enable serious writer’s to take the plunge into the writing frenzy that they so desire. F2K is the birth of a silent muse. That’s right folks, as your muse lay dormant, f2k can fire up the silence with seven weeks of active writing.

Whether it is making new friends, feedbacking and critiquing others, f2k is the place to put your money where your words are. You’ll suddenly feel the winds of change in everything from writing, confidence, all the way through to a finished short story.

You too will see why I find inspiration in a fallen tree (due to winds), sprouting seeds, flowers bursting forth, the aroma of newly fallen rain (when we get it) and the humming of tractors to the hissing of pivots making their rounds.

Isolation can bring about the winds of change, as well as a lost feeling of loneliness but that is why my only ties to the enormous outside world lay right here…at my fingertips.

“Lingering is so very lonely when one lingers all alone.”
~ Mervyn Peake

Quotation Saturday

Picture by Elaine DeBaucher (all rights reserved)

ANGELS

“Saint Anthony said, in his solitude, he sometimes encountered devils who looked like angels, and other times he found angels who looked like devils. When asked how he could tell the difference, the saint said that you can only tell which is which by the way you feel after the creature has left your company.”
~ Elizabeth Gilbert

“He reached forward to cup my cheek, the touch surprising me. "Please understand that no matter what I am or what has happened in the past, I am yours. I am devoted to you above all else, including my own life."
I exhaled after holding my breath for what felt like forever. "That's pretty heavy, Will."
His expression was impassioned, and the backs of his fingers brushed the side of my neck.
"It is a burden I am glad to carry.”
~ Courtney Allison Moulton

“Why does she have wings?'
So she can fly.”
~ Sarah Dessen

“Fools rush in where angels fear to tread.”
~ Alexander Pope

BIRTHDAYS

“With mirth and laughter let old wrinkles come.”
~ William Shakespeare

“Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest.”
~ Larry Lorenzoni

“I grabbed a pile of dust, and holding it up, foolishly asked for as many birthdays as the grains of dust, I forgot to ask that they be years of youth. ”
~ Ovid, Metamorphoses

“Let gratitude be the pillow upon which you kneel to say your nightly prayer. And let faith be the bridge you build to overcome evil and welcome good.”
~ Maya Angelou

WIND

“And forget not that the earth delights to feel your bare feet and the winds long to play with your hair”
~ Kahlil Gibran

“I believe in going with the flow. I don't believe in fighting against the flow. You ride on your river and you go with the tides and the flow. But it has to be your river, not someone else's. Everyone has their own river, and you don't need to swim,float,sail on their's, but you need to be in your own river and you need to go with it. And I don't believe in fighting the wind. You go and you fly with your wind. Let everyone else catch their own gusts of wind and let them fly with their own gusts of wind, and you go and you fly with yours.”
~ C. JoyBell C.

“A sailor chooses the wind that takes the ship from a safe port. Ah, yes, but once you're abroad, as you have seen, winds have a mind of their own. Be careful, Charlotte, careful of the wind you choose.”
~ Avi, The True Confessions of Charlotte Doyle

“A cold wind was blowing from the north, and it made the trees rustle like living things.”
~ George R.R. Martin

JOURNEY

“Not I, nor anyone else can travel that road for you.
You must travel it by yourself.
It is not far. It is within reach.
Perhaps you have been on it since you were born, and did not know.
Perhaps it is everywhere - on water and land.”
~ Walt Whitman, Leaves of Grass

“No man ever steps in the same river twice, for it's not the same river and he's not the same man.”
~Heraclitus

“The only journey is the one within.”
~ Rainer Maria Rilke

“The month of December is the birthday of many men whom I have journeyed with in my life, my beau, Steven, my sons Christopher and Adam and my father. What a blessing to have such great company!”
~ Joni Zipp

Happy Birthday Christopher, born-died ~ December 2nd,1982, 

~ Steven ~ December 4th, Adam ~ December 27th, My dad ~ December 30th

Poetry Sunday ~ Winds in the Willow

Wind in the Willows

***

The wind in the willows walking away;

Cats in the cradle carrying this day.

Harps will be humming a soft melody

Birds are bound for the top of the tree.

Flowers are flowing in fortitudes stance

Branches bending a soulful dance.

Life it lulls and stills the soul

like bud to blossom becoming whole.

Ants are artfully aiming high

Powered persistence playfully ply.

Hypocrites hiss hypothetical spew

Willfully whispered for all to chew.

Soulful spirits sing songs of praise

Unleashing light through the haze.

Darkness dawns here nevermore,

Sleeping wake on a new days shore.

Windy Woes...

Psalm 31:7
I will be glad and rejoice in thy mercy: for thou hast considered my trouble; thou hast known my soul in adversities;
***

Ugh... here we are with another Tuesday upon us. A Tuesday where it is supposed to be Spring and it feels like winter! Yesterdays thirty-four degrees upon wake up with a 21 windchill is not my picture of spring in any sense of the word.

Had someone told me Nebraska was a wind tunnel, I think I would’ve ran the other way, found a new direction. As it is, I’m feeling like a part of a vacuuming system. The relentless, gusting, gnawing, bone-chilling vibrations of the winds really can throw off someone who just wants to play in the garden and enjoy spring.

I love Nebraska and all that the beauty it offers to ones soul, but come on, does it really need to be this windy? I lived in Baltimore for most of my life, we had a few windy days, then I lived in Texas for six years, again a few windy days, but here in the wide open plains of Nebraska, I would say that out of the two years that I’ve lived here, more than 50% of those days were spent in wind!

I can bear the back-biting, spine-tingling cold, I can deal with sun scorching heat dripping humidity, but wind? I can not take much more of this. It literally blows my mind!

Today began yet another f2k session, and as I usually post about it before it comes upon us, I didn’t this time because I’m not mentoring this session and possibly the session after that. The wind kind of has me in a state of upheaval, the season (Easter) kind of has me in a state of yearly reflection, the roller coaster weather has me in a state of perplexity, wondering is this spring, or is this winter.

As I coast through my days realizing there comes a time in ones life where we must prioritize and focus on things that really matter, I’ve decided to focus on me. Selfish of me isn’t it? Not at all, I’ve always taken care of everyone else, helped new writers come into the fold of the writing world, basically held out my hand to whomever was/is in need and sometimes I get lost on the path that I was walking down.

So as I focus on things that matter, some things have to blow in the wind, pun intended. I’m going to focus on writing, writing and more writing. And taking care of my family, so they know that THEY are the most important things in my life. My garden will be planted soon, I just know it. I’ll till and plant and watch spring come to life before my eyes. The school year will come to an end and I’ll spend my days out in the yard with my son, going to the doctors with my beau, and just enjoy all that God has put in my life for me to take care of.

The wind will subside eventually, and when it does...I’m going to relish every ounce of rain and sun that we get and allow it to not only drizzle my skin but penetrate my soul until the really important things in life are front and center for me.

Poetry Sunday ~ Autumn

Ecc. 3:1 To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:

*** 

Autumn
***
The leaves are falling,
the chill is here
once again
that time of year.

As flowers fade
and jack frost looms
fragrance smolders
the ants build rooms.

The grass it dims
oh sacred tree
drop your shelter
down on me.

Time to vacate
and go inside
the world is cold
too oft it died.

I will pray
my jobs not done.
I run the gamut
of a life I’ve won.

Never fear and
always trust.
My God is good
He molded dust!

The WIND!

Gen. 2:7 And the LORD God formed man of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living soul.

***

Is anybody listening? You can hear the wind with its deep prolonged howling out there like a wolf baying at the full moon. Tell it to go away! Day after day, night after night, it prowls the grounds like a morning mist.

I remember in days past the wind was just an element that blew throughout any given day, a tousle of the hair here, a flip of the bangs there, but recently the wind has become a force to reckon with all its own.

It’s nasty, aggressive, life maiming, brutal and merciless. It pounds on windows without a care, it sweeps through the farm like a handmade broom by God, it is a horrendous creature about to devour anything in its wake.

Does anyone ask me if I like it? I don’t. I dislike walking in it, I get wind burn. I despise driving in it as it pushes my car from side to side making me feel like I’m inebriated. The wind hates me and I loathe the callous beast!

It is an obnoxious animal that lurks around every corner just waiting to whip your face into a contorted snarl. The wind licks the trees like a lollipop and likes to spit out the branches and twigs that get stuck in its teeth.

I try to love all the natural elements of the world Earth, Wind, Fire, Water. But these forces are not just a part of what makes up this world, they have chosen to unleash their wrath upon us humans.

I looked into what affect the elements not only have on us as humans but what toll they have taken on the planet Earth.

Wind = thoughts
Fire = desire
Water = Emotions
Earth = Stability

Analogies? “Cool breeze of reason”, “Flames of passion”, “Swamped by emotions”, and the ever popular “Solid as a ROCK”

We’ve been chained to the elements since the beginning of time. Tornadoes and hurricanes have wreaked havoc, wildfires have swept the forest like a radiant vacuum cleaner, floods have swallowed entire towns, and nature has reproduced and evolved as new living creatures form in the Brazilian Rain forest and deserts around the world.

We have God the Father, and his beloved, Mother Nature, who could be considered the bride and reflected image of Creation. By the breath of production of these elements, it boils down to the very core of our existence.

Out in the playground (Earth) are the children (humans) who absorb, play, laugh and cry as our toys (the elements) treat us like fodder.

We’re not alone in our elemental world. We’re a part of it. Now I need to stop all this bickering about the hate and destruction that the forces force on me and drink in the beauty and  living wonder that they provide.

From a song:

Clothed in rainbows, of living color
Flashes of lightning, rolls of thunder
Blessing and honor, strength and glory and power be
to You the only wise King

You all have a glorious day...

Job 12: 10 In whose hand is the soul of every living thing, and the breath of all mankind.

Winds of Change

Job 6: My days are swifter than a weaver's shuttle, and are spent without hope.
[7] O remember that my life is wind: mine eye shall no more see good.

***

You might ask me why I’m stuck on wind this week or why I keep going on about change. Wonder no more. Change is coming, change is inevitable, change happens when we’re not even seeking the little bugger.The wind reference? Well, it's windy here in Nebraska.

As writers we change and grow probably more often than we think. With every new word, new sentence structure, and new craft skill, our writing is changing. Have you noticed a difference in your writing? When you were a teen you wrote, you grew and learned, wrote differently, and now as you’re mature, there are skills you are still learning to implement into your writing?

I can see growth in my writing since beginning this blog. I’m no longer all over the place (some may disagree) but poo on them, I see the change and I’m aware of it with every written word! My sentences have meaning, my poetry has life, I may even have spring in my step.

Uh oh, Spring? Did I say SPRING? I sure did. With Spring, comes change, comes winds of change. Really it sweeps in like a tidal pool and pulls you along and by the time Summer arrives you look back at that Winter person you were and wonder how the heck did you arrive here at this point.

I think with spring in my step, words to carry me from point A to point B, I can shape my world into whatever I want. This week has a rising affect on me and no matter what color my reality is painted, there is no way of escaping the winds of change about to take place.

Can’t you feel it in the trembling soil? Can’t you hear it in the shivering stems? Leaves are bursting forth, grass is popping up, threads of life are everywhere to be seen with the naked eye, or to be heard with the trumpeting ear.

Always remember, change is for the better. To return to the old you is like putting the egg back into the shell; quite impossible, just ask Humpty Dumpty. You may not like the bumps along the way, the shifts or turns in the road, but it is all for the better, the best of the shaping of you!

Why not take the time to reflect this week? Reflect on the person you were, or used to be, the writer that was, to the writer that is, the living breathing entity that is now and yet to be. Come alive with spring. Allow the winds of change to shape you and carry you into a new dawn.

Psalms 16:11 Thou wilt shew me the path of life: in thy presence is fulness of joy; at thy right hand there are pleasures for evermore.

When the wind blows...

Exodus 15: 10 Thou didst blow with thy wind, the sea covered them: they sank as lead in the mighty waters.

***

When I was young I used to sit on the sandy beaches of Ocean City Maryland, either late at night, or at sunrise, just staring out into nothing. The Atlantic seems endless, with its frothy yellow foam, rolling tides gripping the shoreline, ripples of sea continuously slipping and sliding.

The aroma of sea-salt gathered in the wind, carried to my nose as I inhaled all the beauty of life, living and God. The sand would squish between my toes and I could just fall back, gazing up at the infinity of stars in the sky, or watch the clouds make a shape-dance while the winds swept them away.

What I’m getting at is this, we never know when the tides will shift or when the wind blows. We are not supposed to know, that is what makes life such a wondrous mystery is that every day we wake up and have to realize, any way the wind blows, we must  learn to accept the ebb and flow.

Can you control the ocean? Can man? Of course not. Can you put the wind in a bag and carry it with you, only to release it on a hot summers day, right when you need it most? Well can you? You know the answer to that question without even blinking an eye.  But as any two year-old child wonders all the time is, why? We adults can surmise, but even sometimes we have to wonder, why can’t I control the wind, or cease the ocean from rolling? Why? Why? Why?

Okay, you want me to spell it out for you don’t you? You’re probably wondering where the writing lesson is in all of this mumbo-jumbo aren’t you? I’m here to say, that no matter where we think our novel is heading and no matter what we have in mind for the novel, the winds of change can always blow through and make us see something new or different.

Maybe you had a romance in mind and now it looks like it is shaping up to be a para-normal novel, perhaps a thriller turned into a love story, it may just so happen, that your non-fiction tale took a fictional turn. The winds of diversity swept in, cleared the cobwebs from your brain, and you swiftly accepted this change, moved on and it became a best seller. (Hey a girl can dream can’t she?)

Life can be like that too, you know. A complete about-face shakes your world and you wonder what happened? Where did routine and fixation go? Friends, allow me to let you in on a secret, the wonder of it all is placed right in God’s hands. Do you think He wondered what he was doing at creation? He never wonders! He created you and he was well pleased. Although we may not be happy with the winds of change, or the fluctuating shift in the tides in our lives, but HE and he alone sits and doesn’t wonder what is going to happen to you next. He already knows.

Just as the character you created. You know the end result.

As a family, we would eventually return back home to South Baltimore where the concrete and asphalt hugged you until you were about to explode. But every day of every year I always kept the wind in my heart and the flow glued to my life, and I never wondered, what next? :)

Job 27: 21 The east wind carrieth him away, and he departeth: and as a storm hurleth him out of his place.

Poetry Sunday~ Letting Go

Letting Go
All rights reserved: copyright © Joni Zipp***
His arms outstretched
like a branch on a tree
Reaching for the sky
the leaf, I see, as me.

Like sap I’m drinking
the strength He bestows
each arm extending
as this little leaf grows.

I’m green from nectar
that has nourished my soul
growing in strength
understanding my role.

I’m dangling while drinking
the knowledge is near
The season will make
each and everything clear.

Autumn arrives
a brisk wind will blow
I hear something whisper
“It’s time to let go.”

I shiver and shake I’ve
all that I need.
I’m not just a leaf,
but a perpetual seed.
All rights reserved: copyright © Joni Zipp