Poetry Sunday ~ The Nativity

pic from google images

Isa. 9:6  For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counsellor, The mighty God, The everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace.

The Nativity

They walked… in the still of the night.

On an ass… as the two took to flight

They fled… to save their unborn child

They paused… for grace was mercy mild.

The inn… no room for them to stay

A manger… is where the babe would lay.

The Light… would guide this virgin birth

He came… to save this fallen earth.

The lamb… would watch and bow his head

The beasts… huddled ‘round the hay-filled bed.

He lay… against His mother’s breast.

She wept… for now the earth was blessed

They came… to see the Newborn King

The star… led the wise men to sing.

He’s here… wrapped in swaddling clothes

Come now… His living water flows.

Rejoice, Rejoice, Oh Israel

To you has come Emmanuel.

Luke 2: 11-12  For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord. And this shall be a sign unto you; Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger.

Quotation Saturday ~ Advent

From the internet

Matt. 1: 23 Behold, a virgin shall be with child, and shall bring forth a son, and they shall call his name Emmanuel, which being interpreted is, God with us.

It is under the false assumption for people to believe that Advent is for a denomination and full of rites and rituals. Advent is a Spiritual Christian Season that all Christians normally celebrate. It is the love of Christ, the Coming of Christ and a season to cherish the gift that God gave to us. THIS is the reason for the Season! ~ Amen

“One of the essential paradoxes of Advent: that while we wait for God, we are with God all along, that while we need to be reassured of God’s arrival, or the arrival of our homecoming, we are already at home. While we wait, we have to trust, to have faith, but it is God’s grace that gives us that faith. As with all spiritual knowledge, two things are true, and equally true, at once. The mind can’t grasp paradox; it is the knowledge of the soul.”

~ Michelle Blake, The Tentmaker

“ADVENT—the four-week period that leads up to Christmas—is a series of events designed not to delay the celebration of Christmas, but to enhance it. It’s a kind of delayed gratification that culminates in a … satisfaction that is all the richer for the waiting.”

~ Joan Chittister, Listen with the Heart

“The season of Advent means there is something on the horizon the likes of which we have never seen before… What is possible is to not see it, to miss it, to turn just as it brushes past you. And you begin to grasp what it was you missed, like Moses in the cleft of the rock, watching God’s [back] fade in the distance. So stay. Sit. Linger. Tarry. Ponder. Wait. Behold. Wonder. There will be time enough for running. For rushing. For worrying. For pushing. For now, stay. Wait. Something is on the horizon.”
~ Jan L. Richardson, Night Visions: Searching the Shadows of Advent and Christmas

“The spirituality of Advent calls us to start our journey in expectation of the second coming of Christ. The end time is the period in history when the work of Christ will be consummated, when the powers of evil will be put away forever, when the earth will be restored to the golden age described by Isaiah and St. John.” (see Isa. 65; Rev. 20-22).

~ Robert Weber

“IT WAS NOT suddenly and unannounced that Jesus came into the world. He came into a world that had been prepared for him. The whole Old Testament is the story of a special preparation … . Only when all was ready, only in the fullness of his time, did Jesus come.”

~ Phillips Brooks, The Consolations of God: Great Sermons of Phillips Brooks

In Advent spirituality we are also called on to meditate on the birthing of Christ in our hearts. In this matter we are dealing with the conversion of life, the movement away from the old life lived under the power of evil to the new life lived in the power of the Holy Spirit. True conversion is a turning from one way of life to another. Christ calls us to be converted to him, to make him the pattern of our lives, to make our living and dying a living and dying in him.

~ Robert Weber

“This Advent we look to the Wise Men to teach us where to focus our attention. We set our sights on things above, where God is. We draw closer to Jesus… When our Advent journey ends, and we reach the place where Jesus resides in Bethlehem, may we, like the Wise Men, fall on our knees and adore him as our true and only King.”

~ Mark Zimmermann in Our Advent Journey

Tis the Season to be...

Depressed?

Neh. 2: 2 Wherefore the king said unto me, Why is thy countenance sad, seeing thou art not sick? this is nothing else but sorrow of heart. Then I was very sore afraid,

While many of you find this the season of joy, sharing and caring with family, there are so many others out there that don’t see it as the season of joy. Depression hits an all time high during the holiday season and thanks to massive commercialism we’re hit with, it doesn’t help.

It seems like as soon as Halloween hits, Christmas is here in the blink of an eye and we wonder where the time went. I saw Christmas commercials BEFORE Halloween so the media coverage of joy, joy, joy begins in October thrusting what is deemed normal upon people, people who don’t feel the joy of the season; we’re left behind with a burst of depression.

I’m taking a course on Writing the Personal Essay and this has brought a joy to my life. I can now hone in on the craft of telling my personal story, hopefully with more concise precision. The class has hardly begun so don’t expect perfection right away. Why am I telling you this? Because of something I read in one of the books for the course.

Take little bits of memories and write something that comes to mind: Thanksgiving, turkey, family, food. From those four things it will lead you to more of the memory surfacing. In my case, nothing really great surfaced from the memory.

I have four brothers, a sister, a mother and father. Thanksgiving was the only day we sat around the table to have a feast of a meal. We said grace, but again, it is the only day of the year we EVER said grace. I remember wine being served. Did I remember the joy of the day; the celebration of being with my family? No, I remember the jell-o for dessert.

I’m wondering if never having family joy is going to be a catapult of some pretty ugly stories as I venture along this six-week class? I’m also wondering if this is the reason for many people to see this as a season of depression. Maybe they lost a loved one who can’t be here with them, maybe they have bad memories of their childhood and as the season gets underway, memories, not all good ones surface and take over creating a ‘Season of Depression’.

Sadness swells up inside of me right around thanksgiving. Not only for the non-memorable memories but for the more memorable memories that creep up like worms out of a hole.

One memory at the forefront is the loss of my unborn child. Eight and a half months pregnant my child was STILL born. That hung an ugly memory around my neck and has clung there for thirty-two years now.

Grief is not something you just get over and I believe there is no amount of time that can whitewash the event. Whether it is through death, or the loss of a husband or friend that is no longer a part of your life. The holiday becomes the season of grief.

I don’t allow the grief to ruin the holiday for others, instead I carry my grief like a sponge, absorb everything alone, smile and remain appearing happy on the outside but tightly woven grief is wrapped around my heart.

I can’t help it, I miss my son, I miss my mother and father back home in Maryland, I miss seeing and talking to my sister, I miss hugging my nieces and nephews who grew up without me in their lives. As warped as they are, I miss my family!

Now don’t get me wrong, I am extremely thankful that God saw to it that I was placed in a loving family so I could actually experience what a family does on any given holiday, a normal family anyway. I’ve had the love of this family for 11 years now, but only six years of actually being around them on the physical level; that was when we moved to Nebraska.

I had always wondered if I made the right decision in taking my son, Adam Omega, away from my not so normal family and placing him in Texas then moving to Nebraska. I got a somewhat confirmation last week when the mailman asked about my sons name. Low and behold, he shares the ‘unique’ name also! Adam never thought in a million years that he’d EVER meet another person with that name and there he was, delivering mail with the exact same name! I don’t believe in coincidence, so there was more to the meeting than meets the eye. I know now I made the right decision, but I can still miss my family.

I’m thankful Steven only has to work four hours on Thanksgiving (as the previous years he worked a full day AND Black Friday). This year he works 9-4 turkey day and is off Friday giving me the hope that he’ll help Adam and I get ready for Christmas.

I’m so not ready for Christmas. It’s going to be a lot different this year and it will just get more and more different in years to come. It looks like once again my writing will be the saving grace to a more memorable holiday.

So if you’re the kind of person who is surrounded by a family during the holiday, embrace them, be joyful and celebrate the love you are fortunate enough to have surrounding you. Also remember the people that have no one and nothing, remember those who are grieving, remember those who are missing their families. It’s not all about joy, joy, joy to them. We’re grateful for every little morsel of love that is bestowed upon us. Be a light of love for others.

This doesn’t have to be a season of depression, I CAN and WILL make it a memorable season of joy. With the upcoming season of Advent, I will reflect on the true meaning of the season.

God Bless…

Job 6:10 Then should I yet have comfort; yea, I would harden myself in sorrow: let him not spare; for I have not concealed the words of the Holy One.

Insomnia - Food

Jer. 8:15 We looked for peace, but no good came; and for a time of health, and behold trouble!

 Insomnia

With yesterday’s post, we learned insomnia is a disease not just a simple brush-away illness. I’m referring to the people who have had trouble with sleeping for years upon years and never tried to find the culprit.

Today is the day we discuss some culprits that can keep you awake at night, most importantly – food!

Did you know certain food will inhibit your sleep? The time of day or night that you indulge in food can be a real problem when you’re an insomniac. Knowing the smart healthy foods to eat can help your sleep pattern while the wrong foods are going to do a number on your getting a good nights rest.

The right/healthy foods, no matter how tough it is to stomach, are going to enable you to sleep better at night. Whole grain breads and pasta, fruits and vegetables are all going to aid you in a better nights sleep.

I notice many insomniacs overindulge in unhealthy eating habits such as greasy foods, sweets, sugar and caffeine. They say they want to sleep better but do nothing to change or help in their sleeping behavior or even try to change their eating habits.

Like I said yesterday, I sleep a good seven to eight hours a night, peaceful, restful sleep. Am I a health nut? By no means! I eat two to three meals a day and a light snack well before bedtime, never right before and I never ever wake in the middle of the night seeking out a snack because I’m hungry.

I don’t eat greasy foods, I rarely cook in oils and I even more rarely eat out at a fast food restaurant or ANY restaurant for that matter. They are not concerned with your health when selling you that tasty, mouth-watering meal; they’re concerned with a sale and it tasting so good you return over and over again to their establishment.

I eat chocolate maybe twice a year and if I have pie it is either pumpkin or some sort of fruit pie like apple or peach. I sometimes snack on cookies but no more than three. I have never been one to eat more than my stomach can handle and have never been a glutton for things that just aren’t good for my health. My son says I eat like a bird. But I'm only concerned for my health NOW before it becomes a problem like the health issues that haunt my family members.

My mother developed Type 2 Diabetes because of her love of Whitman’s Chocolate, my father developed heart disease because of all the greasy foods my mother cooked and the over abundance of salt in their food. While I love seasonings, salt is hardly ever used in my house. I just never acquired a taste for it after being fed it for 17 years; salt was never a staple in my home cooked meals. You want it, you add it, that’s my motto! I love adding seasonings to my food to make it more appealing; pepper, Italian seasoning, garlic powder/salt, oregano, etc., etc. I also love to add garlic, onions mushrooms, green pepper, you name it.

There is an old saying you are what you eat. I believe this for some odd reason. If you eat unhealthy foods you are going to be unhealthy and have all the illnesses that unhealthy eating will bring about, including insomnia, heart disease, heart failure, diabetes and so many other illnesses that unhealthy eating will cause to surface, usually after it is too late to turn back the clock.

But the good news is, you CAN turn back the clock! You CAN begin to eat healthy and watch your weight change, watch the positive healthy change take place in your body. Your health will change, your sleep or lack thereof will change and you’ll feel better and hopefully live a longer more productive life because of these changes. The choice is up to YOU!

Jer. 33:6 Behold, I will bring it health and cure, and I will cure them, and will reveal unto them the abundance of peace and truth.

Insomnia ~ Peace

Pss. 1:2 But his delight is in the law of the LORD; and in his law doth he meditate day and night.

Peace

I have quite a few friends who suffer from insomnia. Now mind you they are all God loving people, so when they say they have insomnia, I scratch my head. I’m not talking one or two friends either, I’m talking like 10-15 friends all suffering with the inability to sleep and stay there. So if your reading this, I’m not targeting you, I’m trying to understand the condition, the disease.

We live in a world of stress, noises and images that all clog the mind. I used to have disrupted sleep when I was younger but I knew it was from the stress of the day and the long arduous days and nights of simply living as a drug user and alcoholic. But after coming clean, clearing my soul and conscience of the poisons intoxicating my body, I honed in on ways to fall asleep and stay asleep.

Granted I was twenty-one when I came clean and am now nearing 50, I still rest peacefully and comfortably for seven-eight hours a night. Some of my tricks to get me to this point are now conscious forming habits that led me to just keeping still and falling fast asleep.

It all might change again in my later years but for now, I’m relishing the peace that washes over me every single night and I carry it with me throughout my waking days. What are my tips and how do you attain the peace? I don’t know if it will work for you because most are chronic sufferers that have had this struggle since childhood and have tried everything to no avail. You have my sympathy.

Look at the list for symptoms of insomnia:

Difficulty falling asleep

Awakening during the night

Not feeling well rested

Daytime tiredness

Irritability, depression, or anxiety

Difficulty paying attention

Increased errors

Tension headaches

Distress in the stomach

Ongoing worries about sleep

That’s quite a list. Do you see yourself with ANY of these symptoms? One or two probably doesn’t signify chronic insomnia but more than three; you’re a chronic insomniac.

We’re not going to add medications to the list here because the older you get or the more medications you take can be a cause for sleepless nights. But the main cause of insomnia, especially chronic insomnia that which you’ve had since you were a child, is stress and anxiety.

As a sufferer you may fool yourself into believing you don’t have any depression or stress. You may lie over and over again making excuses with it’s the meds, it’s the noise, it’s the ______, you fill in the blank. What lies do you tell yourself? Let’s face it, you’re stressed! Whether it is meeting the standard of what other people see in you, bills you can’t pay, the job you hate, or facing old age, stress is the killer. Yes KILLER! If you’re happy and content with that, then read no further.

The Mayo Clinic reports: “Sleep is as important to your health as a healthy diet and regular exercise. Whatever your reason for sleep loss, insomnia can affect you both mentally and physically. People with insomnia report a lower quality of life compared with people who are sleeping well.” 

Do you remember as a kid our parents told us that if we had trouble sleeping to count sheep? Do you know why? What does sheep have to do with the inability to sleep? Well for starters it’s a way of focusing the mind on something other than your stressful thoughts. It’s a form of meditation.

Meditation is a secret tool I implemented in my early days of clearing my mind of stressful distractions and it has been an essential tool in finding a peace like never before. Some may laugh and scoff claiming it doesn’t work, but you DO know God has placed very simple tools in our hands, like herbs instead of drugs, to help aid us with our diseases and illnesses that take over our bodies. Meditation is a tool from God to use and aid us in stress-filled times.

Pss. 63:6 When I remember thee upon my bed, and meditate on thee in the night watches.

Many people listen to audiobooks when they’re trying to fall asleep, this is stimulating your mind and the very reason it doesn’t work for insomniacs. Some listen to music but again this is stirring the mind and doesn’t have long-term effects. To find sleep, one must relax the mind.

What is MY method? I’ll share, but first let me tell you I am not without stress, depression and illnesses so don’t think this is just coming from a happy-all-the-time gal. I have experienced many depths of darkness but I still enjoy seven to eight hours of SLEEP!

Before falling asleep there are things I do first, like pray. Not for myself, not for my situation not for me me me. I like to pray for others in need (there is always time to pray for me). I’ve said my prayers.

The second thing is to have my rainfall cd playing in the background. I love rainfall and thunder and since snow makes no sound, rain is my choice. You might have another comforting sound to focus on but mine is rain.

Begin focusing on the sound. Stress creeping in? Put it in a box, a cardboard box, for safe keeping until tomorrow, right now you need to focus on the drops. Bills, things to do gnawing at you? See the paper of the bill? See the word? Place it in the box. Picture the box floating in the midst of stars, millions of stars, the box looks quite small doesn’t it? You’re placing whatever is stressing you into the box as each distraction tries to get through, place them one by one in the box. If it gets full, start a new box!

The box will get full as you fill it with your worries, y’know. If you don’t have enough self control to focus because of a pain your feeling or the thoughts are too numerous, this box trick might take some time before your nights are filled with rest.

The box or boxes, are floating in the universe. You see them, you know they’re your worries, but the drops of rain make you realize the box can’t get wet. Drip after drip the box moves out into the solar system, you see the paper fluttering from the boxes; worries all stored for another time, you see numerous boxes and all your problems are in there. You’re focusing on the box as it is floating…floating…you sleep.

You’re going to try this night after night. It’s not a one-try deal. Repetition and perseverance is what’s going to make this work. Now if you’d rather think of your worries and focus on them, then you will be maintaining the disease and keeping it alive for years to come. Please don’t tell me you like stress and enjoy restless nights of sleep, it is up to YOU, your mind, your conscience and your very SOUL to be WORTH the change.

God Bless!

Nurturing the Seed

Luke 8:14 And that which fell among thorns are they, which, when they have heard, go forth, and are choked with cares and riches and pleasures of this life, and bring no fruit to perfection

A lot of times people walk on rubble filled roads. They stumble and feel their feet are on unsure footing but they keep walking. Trudging along a dirt path yet always looking up to see if the sun will lighten the path, dry out the rubble and help them get to where they are going to in warmth without sinking in the mud.

Have you ever walked this path? Walked, stumbled, picked yourself up, then walked some more. Yeah I think many of us have. It’s always nice when the sun is shining down, isn’t it and we have light to show us the way?

I oftentimes think of those who stumble as I myself have sunk in a few mud traps myself. But what pulled me out, what gave me the strength to go on, knowing there was mud holes everywhere just waiting for my feet? The Son.

A seed, when placed in soil is sunken into the depths of darkness that we humans might not understand. Sometimes we cling to the darkness and linger there. A seed knows better than us! It knows that when the warmth begins to surround it, the seed rears its head and perks up, it feels even the slightest ray of sunshine and it begins its ascent in reaching for that Light that calls it to rise.

When we get comfortable in the soil, the mud pits, whatever you wish to call the deep abyss we sink into when depressed or fallen on hard times, the dark is the only thing to warm us. What happens to a seed, unattended by light and water? It dies, just as the soul does when not nourished.

My friend has a beautiful picture of a Christmas cactus that she shared. I told her my mother has one about 15 years old. I thought that was pretty long but she reported that her friend has one that is 35 years old! Wow! Talk about endurance. Love and care is what makes these plants so hardy. They weather many changes, through drought tolerance and climate changes; the Christmas cactus is one of the many plants that are perfect examples of human life.

Many people say they have no luck with plants. Luck, really? It is not by luck that a plant thrives nor does ones soul find rejuvenation by luck. I can bet that those who have no ‘luck’ with plants are the pessimist and realist of society.

I myself, while having many plants around my home that have survived 11 years so far and are still growing strong, I could never get a handle on Miniature Roses. I’ve had many but they all seemingly died! And I took the same care of them as I did my other plants. What was wrong? Care! I wasn’t caring for the sensitive plant. Like my soul, I let it do its thing, watering and tending thinking this was all it needed.

Love, it needed love and light and it needed care. My experiment this year was with another miniature Rose; a tiny frame in a 2-inch pot. I set it on my windowsill. It was really loving the Light, water and pruning! Just like my soul, AHA!

Spring arrived and I got the best soil for it to be replanted, a much bigger pot and set it outside in the warmth of the sun. It didn’t like the heat of the midday sun, but it thrived in the morning sun. There it sat until the temperature changes in late August had me pulling my very full and beautiful roses inside.

The leaves began to fall almost immediately to the extent I had bare twigs. Instead of seeing it as dead as in other years, I saw it as reviving itself. Shedding the old, bringing in the new, the next month would show a resurgence of life and this very day it is still alive and has a rosebud on it.

Sometimes we give up on our souls and just let them do their own thing. I’m sorry people but that is just not good enough! You need to nurture and tend your soul with the very best you can give it. I choose the Word of God but that might not be for everyone. We need to find what our soul needs to grow and feed it, treat it well, lavish it with tender care and beauty and you’ll see it flourish, even in the darkest of times.

Poetry Sunday ~ I Give Thanks

1 Chron. 16: 8 Give thanks unto the LORD, call upon his name, make known his deeds among the people.

 

 I Give Thanks

 For all we are and all we do

we give our thanks each day.

We live, grow, change and mend

I give my thanks and pray.

I thank my mother and father

for all the things they gave.

Within their hand they held my life

but only One could save.

I led the life He wanted for me

although the road was rough.

I never look back with any regret

the rocky roads were tough.

The path was laid before we were born

the forks were all in place.

Which we chose was a cosmic bend

that altered time and space.

I found a cross in my walk

as I wandered through each year.

Whimsical times and frenzied mind

He made it all seem clear.

The crystal shell lay in shards

glass was torn to pieces.

He put them all together again

my love for Him never ceases!

I thank the Lord for carrying me

through my most daunting days.

I’m mended now because of Him,

a path of newfound ways.

Quotation Saturday

Pss. 16:9 Therefore my heart is glad, and my glory rejoiceth: my flesh also shall rest in hope.

OPTIMIST

“People who are too optimistic seem annoying. This is an unfortunate misinterpretation of what an optimist really is.
An optimist is neither naive, nor blind to the facts, nor in denial of grim reality. An optimist believes in the optimal usage of all options available, no matter how limited. As such, an optimist always sees the big picture. How else to keep track of all that’s out there? An optimist is simply a proactive realist.
An idealist focuses only on the best aspects of all things (sometimes in detriment to reality); an optimist strives to find an effective solution. A pessimist sees limited or no choices in dark times; an optimist makes choices.
When bobbing for apples, an idealist endlessly reaches for the best apple, a pessimist settles for the first one within reach, while an optimist drains the barrel, fishes out all the apples and makes pie.
Annoying? Yes. But, oh-so tasty!”
~ Vera Nazarian

“If an optimist had his left arm chewed off by an alligator, he might say in a pleasant and hopeful voice, "Well this isn't too bad, I don't have a left arm anymore but at least nobody will ever ask me if I'm left-handed or right-handed," but most of us would say something more along the lines of, "Aaaaaa! My arm! My arm!”
~ Lemony Snicket

“You can add up your blessings or add up your troubles. Either way, you'll find you have an abundance.”
~ Richelle E. Goodrich

“The pessimist waits for better times, and expects to keep on waiting; the optimist goes to work with the best that is at hand now, and proceeds to create better times.”
~ Christian D. Larson

PESSIMIST

“Believe. No pessimist ever discovered the secrets of the stars, or sailed to an uncharted island, or opened a new heaven to the human spirit.”
~ Helen Keller

“Life is divided into the horrible and the miserable.”
~ Woody Allen

“Doubt is a form of pessimism that acts as an agent, which is sent to hinder prosperity on its materilization journey.”
~ Michael Bassey Johnson

“The pessimist reason that things just happen, where the optimist believe that things happen for a reason.”
~ Anthony Liccione

REALIST

“The genuine realist, if he is an unbeliever, will always find strength and ability to disbelieve in the miraculous, and if he is confronted with a miracle as an irrefutable fact he would rather disbelieve his own senses than admit the miraculous also.”
~ Fyodor Dostoyevsky

“It is better to recognise that we are in darkness than to pretend that we can see the light.”
~ Hedley Bull

“She [Samantha Lyle] was a realist, someone who knew choices were meant to be made, and that one must suffer the consequences of those choices, no matter what they were.”
~ Ayr Bray

“Maybe it's not logical. I don't know. I don't care. I've been asked didnt I think it odd that I should be present to witness the death of everything and I do think it's odd but that doesnt mean it's not so. Someone has to be here.”
~ Cormac McCarthy

HOPE

“Hope is the thing with feathers
That perches in the soul
And sings the tune without the words
And never stops at all.”
~ Emily Dickinson

“When we love, we always strive to become better than we are. When we strive to become better than we are, everything around us becomes better too.”
~ Paulo Coelho

“There is neither happiness nor misery in the world; there is only the comparison of one state with another, nothing more. He who has felt the deepest grief is best able to experience supreme happiness. We must have felt what it is to die, Morrel, that we may appreciate the enjoyments of life.
" Live, then, and be happy, beloved children of my heart, and never forget, that until the day God will deign to reveal the future to man, all human wisdom is contained in these two words, 'Wait and Hope.”
~ Alexandre Dumas

“The world is indeed full of peril, and in it there are many dark places; but still there is much that is fair, and though in all lands love is now mingled with grief, it grows perhaps the greater.”
~ J.R.R. Tolkien

Good Things Happen

Gal. 5: 22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,

We spoke of bad things happening this week. While we know bad things happen, we also know good things happen. It seems to me, being an optimist and all, good things happen for me all the time.

I listen to people complain about things over and over again. The same things they complained about last year are still the same things they complain about this year and will complain about next year too. They never try to change.

People flee from the optimist because they’re always applauding the good things happening; people flee from the pessimist because they keep harping on the bad things that are happening. But people flock to the realist because, let’s face it, they embrace the good and bad things and just go through life accepting the fact that good and bad things happen, deal with it.

Let’s pick these three apart:

There is the optimist, who when something bad has happened, chooses to see it as a bad thing but something good is about to happen, or something better is yet to come. It’s not bragging when something good has happened, it’s sharing. I like to share with people (who may be going through the same thing) that while I was on a darkened path, something in the form of a ray of light came through and Lightened the way. And more often than not, it happened by way of Divine Intervention. That’s just the way * I * see it, the optimist.

Then there is the pessimist. While he or she is on the darkened path, they feel the need to share that pain and anguish. It is as if they are wallowing in the pool and waiting for someone else to throw them an anchor to hold onto, preferably from another pessimist.

They scream and wail for help and the bystander pessimist announces to the sufferer, “Here’s the anchor, just claw your way to shore and I’ll give it to you.”

Or they’ll scoff and say, “Well I told you so. You got yourself in that mess, you can get yourself out of it!

The pessimist takes a negative and amplifies the situation with more negativity. That’s just the way the pessimists work.  Negative people feed off one another. Not much good can come from two negative people! Put an optimist in the path of the pessimist and guess what, we toss that anchor of hope out and reel in the pessimist.

Then there is the realist who says ‘Deal with it.’ Yup, they’ve been dealt a raw deal and they just shrug and deal with it. They don’t seek promise, hope and faith. They just deal. They don’t trash the situation, they just deal. They see things as they ARE not the possibilities of what could BE.

I guess that’s an okay kind of merry-go-round sort of life but in reality it is no life. They just circle the days and deal with whatever comes; they don’t strive to become anything more than what they are dealt, they just deal. TO ME, a realist has covered his tracks in rose petals and lies to himself that a swift wind won’t blow them away. And remember, a liar always believes what he sells himself; and usually more times than not, the lie catches up, a gust of wind blows all the rose petals away and they are made to see what reality they have created for themselves.

I’m not ragging on the pessimist and realist of society, I’m just enlightening the fact that they’re out there. Society is made up of billions of them actually and basically that is why the world is in such disarray. We optimists can’t carry the world, you know, but we do keep it spinning. Why? Because we see HOPE in tomorrow, no matter how  bad it is today.

What I’m trying to say is this: pessimists survive, realist live, while optimist have hope. I have friends in each of these categories and I don’t judge their choices. I try and give them hope in turning that negative into a positive, even when they SWEAR there is not a problem, I extend HOPE! Call it the optimist in me trying to see the good in everything.

Good things happen to me because you can throw all the negative crud you want at me, and somehow, some way, I’ll make it positive and good will flow like living water from me! It’s all any of us can do to make it in the world today.

Maybe try looking up > optimist, instead of down > the pessimist, or side to side > the realist. Walk with a clear conscience and embrace the good about to happen, the hope that the best is yet to come.

Amen! 

Bad Things Happen

Acts 11: 23 “Who, when he came, and had seen the grace of God, was glad, and exhorted them all, that with purpose of heart they would cleave unto the Lord.”

Bad Things Happen

Bad things happen to good people, that much we know. What we do and how we react to these bad things makes all the difference in the world. I am a known optimist. When something bad happens in my life I know right around the corner is something better just waiting for me. I see good in everything.

Since I was a child I always saw the Light at the end of the tunnel. I always have seen a path, right or wrong in situations. While at the time of something bad happening it is so hard to even see a sliver of light penetrating the darkness, I held onto hope and faith to get me through.

I seriously think this is a problem for many people. They have sunken so deep into negativity, they have trouble grasping the light that is being handed to them, thus staying in the dark and not really ever embracing the light. No change can happen if you always see the negative (or not so  positive) in everything.

A perfect example is the night sky. While many people walk out the door and see darkness shielding them, I choose to walk out the door and see the stars piercing through the darkness. When it is cloudy and shielding me from seeing the stars, I hold onto hope that the clouds will soon disappear. I have faith that the sun is still out there shining and will  break through the clouds.

The realist will say that the sun being there is just a scientific fact. The pessimist will say the obscurity can go on for days, the optimist will see the Light no matter how far off the sun may be. I know it is there; I have faith that it will shine on me and carry me away from any negative thoughts or feelings.

A realist defined is a person who tends to view or represent things as they really are. To them, the stars are just forms of gases fixed in a space. The Word of God is just words until he/she can have proof otherwise. Even after they are proven, they need more proof. Think Thomas, the ‘I need to see the nail holes and put my hands on them’ Thomas; a witness but never the less, needing even MORE proof.

So where does faith fit into the equation? I hear people say they HAVE faith but I also hear others say they’ve LOST faith, to me forming a spectrum of negativity that has no place for the word faith.

Faith is the unknown. Faith is the unseen. Faith is trust in all that propels us forward. Realism is accepting that you have to be REAL before you can have faith and pessimism is not accepting anything on the grain of sand faith stands.

I can bet Thomas was a realist and I can bet Judas was a pessimist. Take these two characters out of the book and you have men, men who never embraced the Light which was being given to them freely.

Choices. We all make choices in right or wrong and with that there are consequences. Don’t blame God if you make the wrong choices. Don’t blame God if all the good you do isn’t being rewarded with good things. Bad things happen to good people but it is the CHOICE to see the good in situations that we optimists are rewarded with good things. I speak from the positively good things and bad that have happened throughout my life from experience.

Bad things happen to good people. Not because God is punishing you. Not because God deems you unworthy. Bad things happen because of the CHOICES you make.

Poetry Sunday ~ O Soul of Mine

Isa. 42:25 Therefore he hath poured upon him the fury of his anger, and the strength of battle: and it hath set him on fire round about, yet he knew not; and it burned him, yet he laid it not to heart.

O Soul of Mine

O fretful soul of mine that grieves
Is it thou that freely leaves?
Lost amid the fruitful wine
Fleshing over such fragrant vine.

Will thou remain a mystery;
True divine I never see?
Or wilt thou rain on me with blessing,
Teach me yet another lesson?

Scouring through the murky mire,
Passion snared for earthly desire.
A valiant cross that I must bear.
My heart entwines in thy snare.

O earthly soul for all I gave,
Dwells within a darkened cave.
Allow thy shield of purity,
Seep in through my elegy.

Allow thy light to shine on me,
O soul of mine I thrive on thee.
Bequeath me in thy blazon glory;
Release from me this inner fury.

Pss. 11:1 In the LORD put I my trust: How say ye to my soul, Flee as a bird to your mountain?

The Ebola Scare

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Philippians 4:8 "Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy--meditate on these things."

The Ebola Scare

Does even the name make you cringe? Here in recent news this is all you ever hear about, Ebola. I think people get scared because as in anything we don’t know a thing about and what we do know is all spoon fed to us via media outlets who are often one sided.

Are you the kind of person that when something serious happens, you want to know all the information you can about the event? You sit sometimes for hours seeking out news, listening to people, digging through fact-finding websites just so you can get some kind of handle on the situation?

It’s been an interesting month in the Ebola crisis. It began with U.S. missionaries flown here for treatment over the past summer, they were treating Ebola patients and came down with the disease and were brought back to America to be treated, then it went to a man Thomas Eric Duncan who came into the country with Ebola, and now two nurses are fighting the disease because they took care of Mr. Duncan.

Here’s what we know about the Ebola scare:

According to the World Health Organization, the Ebola outbreak in West Africa has sickened 8,399 people since March, killing 4,033 of them -- making it one of the worst outbreaks of the virus in history.

We know that two nurses that had close contact with Duncan have now been diagnosed with Ebola and finally after two and a half weeks of exposure to the outside world, the 75 or more attendants of Duncan are being asked to have limited contact with the outside world.

Due to the lackadaisical attitude of the CDC and of the nurses who treated Duncan, Americans are now fearful of where the disease will show up next. I say fearful because the illness knows no bounds and I feel the Center for Disease Control is not as in control as they would like us to believe.

They are the people who didn’t restrict the nurses from boarding planes, jumping on a Cruise ship and exposing possibly hundreds of people to the disease. Why wasn’t after every single worker that came into contact with Duncan told they had to restrict contact with others for 21 days? Because of the inconvenience to this very selfish society? To me, it’s a very ignorant response to a lethal killing machine.

Then there is the lying factor. First, Duncan did not tell anyone he had come in close contact with a woman who died from Ebola. He exposed everyone on the plane but because he didn’t have symptoms, he ignorantly thought he was exempt from spreading the disease. He told the hospital the very first time he came in with a fever that he had just come back from the infected Liberia, but they sent him home.

He goes home and comes in contact with three residents living in the house, whom we’ve not heard a peep about since they were put in isolation. He is rushed back to the hospital, VERY sick, and is in contact with unprotected nurses and doctors again, who then finally diagnose him. He’s carted off to isolation and later dies.

We know the Dallas Texas hospital was not capable of handling such an infectious disease and instead of notifying a more capable hospital, only FOUR in the country, the ego won out and the hospital sat on a high horse claiming, “We got this handled!”

They DID NOT have the sources to care for the disease and because of their ignorance many are coming down with the disease. The country is blaming Obama for letting people into this country, pointing fingers at people for this and for that all the while the Ebola scare is becoming a real possible epidemic.

I blame the selfish ignorant people who sat on a high horse thinking they were exempt from such a disease even though they KNEW full well that they had been in contact with a contagious man, therefore possibly sharing their disease with hundreds of others. The spoon-fed smiling faces of the infected do not fool me into thinking I’m exempt!

Satan has got us in his hands. People are fearing, lying, ashamed, hiding facts, being selfish and thinking of only themselves and their pleasure. They are killing, raping, beating and devouring the very essence of morality in record proportions.

I have a funny feeling that people are going to be turning to their faith, any faith, flocking to the churches and finding peace while hiding from pain and fear of this retribution. These are the times I read about and the times I’ve prepared my soul for in the grand scheme of things. May the Lord God be with you all.

Isa. 52:10 The LORD hath made bare his holy arm in the eyes of all the nations; and all the ends of the earth shall see the salvation of our God.

Grains of Sand

Job. 6:3 For now it would be heavier than the sand of the sea: therefore my words are swallowed up.

Grains of Sand

Shards of glass, window broken

Words unsaid, never spoken

Lining up the grains of sand

I reach out to grasp a hand.

No one sees me standing there

Arms outstretched in deep despair.

Calls unheard, emotions dripping

Grains of sand, my fingers slipping.

Fragments of a former storm

Threads just barely keep me warm

I extend a trembling hand

Seeking out one grain of sand.

There along the barren shore

I am offered an open door.

Carried from this desolate land

Rainbows blink on grains of sand.

Prov. 27:3 A stone is heavy, and the sand weighty; but a fool's wrath is heavier than them both.

 

 

Reminiscent

Luke 23: 42 And he said unto Jesus, Lord, remember me when thou comest into thy kingdom.

I remember telling Adam I sometimes wish I had never left Baltimore. His response kind of shocked me. “But mom, look at all the people whose lives you touched. That wouldn’t have happened back there and you know it.”

I had an ‘It’s a Wonderful Life’ moment. Really? I touch people? I didn’t know whether he meant ‘touched’ people and their lives or had an affect on them. Let me see: I would’ve not signed up to WVU, I would have never met this awesome family in Nebraska and had a chance to see what normal looked like. I would have not crossed the path of so many who needed a prayer or a lifting of spirits; I would’ve never met mu church family; I would not have been me.

Joining the WVU community brought me to hundreds of minds like mine. Back home I wasn’t ‘allowed’ to make use of friendships on the internet. They were all mass killers in the minds of my sick people surrounding me, who by the way had tried to make ME believe that, but I’m a rebel at heart.

I have said many of times how GOD brought me to Nebraska so I won’t repeat the story again. But had I not rebelled against ‘my people’ I would have not been able to reach out and touch many lives. Through all of these people I feel love pouring through my screen and not the demented love of my blood family, real caring and compassionate love.

So after Monday’s post, which I started writing Sunday by the way, God placed something on my heart and yesterday on facebook two of my Christian friends posted this same scripture!

Proverbs 3:5-8 NASB Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight. Do not be wise in your own eyes; Fear the Lord and turn away from evil. It will be healing to your body and refreshment to your bones.

Let me tell you, I have a strong community of Christian online friends who might not be physical to me but we all have such a strong spiritual connection it exceeds anything physical!

Now you read my post of Monday and think, “Wow she’s losing it.” But no, really I’m reflecting on everything. Doggone me, I sure do a lot of reflecting and soul searching. That’s the way God made me.

I’m putting things into perspective here. I cannot worry what he does or what he doesn’t do, I have to worry what * I * do and as long as I stay focused on God, I will be carried by Him. I wrote a poem a while back titled ‘Your Sin is Not My Sin’. And I need to practice what I preach. Not worry about HIS sin and what he does, just worry about me and MY relationship to God.

While I go around lifting people up in prayer, presenting a happy-go-lucky lifestyle, inside I cringe. I’m tired of being made to feel stupid, I’m tired of people correcting me like everything I do is tagged as wrong, whether it is spelling, comma usage, or dangling participles. I guess as a writer I need to be made aware of my mistakes, but on a social site? I let go of everything; I typo, I often make mistakes but guess what I KNOW I make mistakes and sitting there editing everything on my facebook wall is nothing but paranoia of being pegged as stupid.

Since being diagnosed with arthritis in my back, not only does it cause me imbalance, it affects EVERYTHING I do in life from dressing myself to cooking and cleaning. In my physical world, I’m looked at as a poor crippled who can’t do anything. In the virtual world, no one sees my disability and doesn’t understand the daily pain I go through just to get out of bed and make them smile.

It affects my mind too. I’ll try and think of something, and often I can’t grasp what I’m even thinking. An example; months ago I was looking for a magic marker and I said, “Do you have a harpie I could borrow?”

I was looked at, laughed at and then responded to, “Do you mean a SHARPIE?” Isn’t that what I said? It is what I meant but it isn’t what came out of my mouth. It happens too often and instead of compassion, I get mocked.

I think God is showing me the way people are treated on a daily basis with even the most minor of disabilities. Imagine being an amputee and having your prosthetic leg stolen. Yeah, it happened in Pennsylvania at an Eagles game. People assume the disabled are smaller people than their higher-than-mighty selves.

Being reminiscent of all I’m enduring has made me think of bigger things that I have no control over and that I need not focus on. I am me and God made me this way. I need to focus on God and me but mostly God and giving it all up to Him!

Alone

Num. 11:14 I am not able to bear all this people alone, because it is too heavy for me.

I think I’m being selfish here.

I have no desire to live and every time I have these thoughts God places something on my heart to keep me here.

Is it Nebraska I’m tired of? Is it the life I made for myself that I’m tired of? Is it just me throwing a pity party for myself?

I think I’m tired of being alone. Alone in my thoughts, alone watching football, alone in my world where the only people I have to communicate is my son, and my internet friends who sometimes are the only thing that keep me alive. Yes, I know, with God I am never alone but I need a physical, emotional kind of love in my life that I’m not getting. Is that being selfish? Wanting to be loved?

The enemy has placed himself here in this house and I have no way of ridding him when I myself am hanging in the balances. I feel like a failure as a mother, a writer, a wife (when I was one) and definitely a failure in the relationship department. Anti-social is not me but out here in the middle of nowhere, one can begin to feel a little isolated from the world.

So where did the road start to twist and turn.  Well right after Adam graduated I felt it shift, then a month passed and we quit going to church. That was a depressing time, but I pulled myself out of the hole with the help of Bob offering me a place back in the writing world and I took that as a promising sign but the world around me was still crashing.

I continue to slowly spiral down with a few puffs upward mind you, but still, plummeting down. I completed a six-week fiction writing course and it was good, but I realized I’m really not cut out for fiction writing. I was seriously considering self-publishing until someone said, “Make sure you get it edited, your grammar is lousy!” This as my book of poetry was to be handed in THAT day. I backed out.

Then I fell. I tripped over my computer wire and didn’t have the ability to catch myself and I went down hard injuring my already throbbing back, the fall turned it into a bass pounding thumping that had me clinging to my cane for a day. Yes a cane, go ahead and tease me how only old ladies use canes, it’s not like I haven’t heard it before. I only use it for emergencies and this was an emergency.

Then there was the three days off. He had three days in a row off and I knew what to expect, a thirty-hour plus marathon of You Tube. Yeah, that’s real communication isn’t it. Uh oh, a dangling participle, sue me someone!

Then there was the news of our Christmas. Yeah, no exchanging of gifts, just a day of food and family. While it is HIS family and not mine, I’m sorry (selfish moment here) the exchanging of gifts, all sitting around, taking turns in opening them was a highlight of five years of Christmas’ here, all to be silenced by food. Joy! I’ll enjoy a few nibbles and savor every moment I have in a FAMILY atmosphere. Something I NEVER had or have in my life.

Can you tell I’m at the end of my rope here? I’m dangling and there isn’t one soul who is reaching out to comfort me, here in the pit of isolation. Then to top it off, a friend lost his mother, another friend lost his daughter, and yet another friend lost their father. Then there is this whole scare with Ebola and I’m clinging to the only light I had in my life these past few years, Pastor Mike. I listened to his sermon and I felt the fishing rod pulling me back to shore.

On an okay note, Medicaid sent me an application to RENEW? I had it the first year I came to Nebraska, but then the next year I became ineligible. Apparently living with someone means I make too much money (even though I don’t see or have a dime.) It came out of the blue and since there’s no guarantee I have nothing to lose, right? Right! I either get it or I don’t. That’s like saying I either live or I die, no biggy, I’ll take either one.

Will anyone read this? Will anyone care? Probably not. If I don’t post in on facebook, no one will even know this posts exists.

I’m sounding like an ungrateful whiny brat, I know. But I’m done. I’m not anyone’s doormat and I have to be done.

I don’t know.

I just don’t know.

Even in my darkest days, He assures me I have a REASON to be alive.