Quotation Saturday ~ Faith

Luke 21:19 “In your patience possess ye your souls.” 

ENDURANCE

“I used many times to touch my own chest and feel, under its asthmatic quiver, the engine of the heart and lungs and blood and feel amazed at what I sensed was the enormity of the power I possessed. Not magical power, but real power. The power simply to go on, the power to endure, that is power enough, but I felt I had also the power to create, to add, to delight, to amaze and to transform.” 
― Stephen Fry

“Despite your best efforts, people are going to be hurt when it's time for them to be hurt.” 
― Haruki Murakami

“No pain that we suffer, no trial that we experience is wasted. It ministers to our education, to the development of such qualities as patience, faith, fortitude and humility. All that we suffer and all that we endure, especially when we endure it patiently, builds up our characters, purifies our hearts, expands our souls, and makes us more tender and charitable, more worthy to be called the children of God . . . and it is through sorrow and suffering, toil and tribulation, that we gain the education that we come here to acquire and which will make us more like our Father and Mother in heaven.” 
― Orson F. Whitney

“If you're serious about sanctification, you can expect to experience heart-wrenching moments that try your faith, your endurance, and your patience.” 
― Sheri Dew

PATIENCE

“The two hardest tests on the spiritual road are the patience to wait for the right moment and the courage not to be disappointed with what we encounter.” 
― Paulo Coelho

Patience is not the ability to wait. Patience is to be calm no matter what happens, constantly take action to turn it to positive growth opportunities, and have faith to believe that it will all work out in the end while you are waiting.” 
― Roy T. Bennett

“I realized that the deepest spiritual lessons are not learned by His letting us have our way in the end, but by His making us wait, bearing with us in love and patience until we are able to honestly to pray what He taught His disciples to pray: Thy will be done.” 
― Elisabeth Elliot

“Patience is not passive resignation, nor is it failing to act because of our fears. Patience means active waiting and enduring. It means staying with something and doing all that we can - working, hoping, and exercising faith; bearing hardship with fortitude, even when the desires of our hearts are delayed. patience is not simply enduring; it is enduring well!

Impatience, on the other hand, is a symptom of selfishness. It is a trait of the self-absorbed. It arises from the all too-prevalent condition called "center of the universe" syndrome, which leads people to believe that the world revolves around them and that all others are just supporting cast in the grand theater of mortality in which only they have the starring role.” 
― Dieter F. Uchtdorf

HOPE

“TO BE HOPEFUL in bad times is not just foolishly romantic. It is based on the fact that human history is a history not only of cruelty, but also of compassion, sacrifice, courage, kindness.
What we choose to emphasize in this complex history will determine our lives. If we see only the worst, it destroys our capacity to do something. If we remember those times and places—and there are so many—where people have behaved magnificently, this gives us the energy to act, and at least the possibility of sending this spinning top of a world in a different direction.
And if we do act, in however small a way, we don’t have to wait for some grand utopian future. The future is an infinite succession of presents, and to live now as we think human beings should live, in defiance of all that is bad around us, is itself a marvelous victory.” 
― Howard Zinn

“It isn't as bad as you sometimes think it is. It all works out. Don't worry. I say that to myself every morning. It all works out in the end. Put your trust in God, and move forward with faith and confidence in the future. The Lord will not forsake us. He will not forsake us. If we will put our trust in Him, if we will pray to Him, if we will live worthy of His blessings, He will hear our prayers.” 
― Gordon B. Hinckley

“Write it on your heart
that every day is the best day in the year.
He is rich who owns the day, and no one owns the day
who allows it to be invaded with fret and anxiety.

Finish every day and be done with it.
You have done what you could.
Some blunders and absurdities, no doubt crept in.
Forget them as soon as you can, tomorrow is a new day;
begin it well and serenely, with too high a spirit
to be cumbered with your old nonsense.

This new day is too dear,
with its hopes and invitations,
to waste a moment on the yesterdays.” 
― Ralph Waldo Emerson

“You do not need to know precisely what is happening, or exactly where it is all going. What you need is to recognize the possibilities and challenges offered by the present moment, and to embrace them with courage, faith and hope.” 
― Thomas Merton

FAITH

“When you walk to the edge of all the light you have and take that first step into the darkness of the unknown, you must believe that one of two things will happen. There will be something solid for you to stand upon or you will be taught to fly.” 
― Patrick Overton

“We never know when our last day on earth will be. So, love with full sincerity, believe with true faith and hope with all of your might. Better to have lived in truth and discovered life, than to have lived half-heartedly and died long before you ever ceased breathing. ” 
― Cristina Marrero

“All who call on God in true faith, earnestly from the heart, will certainly be heard, and will receive what they have asked and desired.” 
― Martin Luther

“You are where you need to be. Just take a deep breath.” 
― Lana Parrilla

Rom. 5:3-4 “And not only so, but we glory in tribulations also: knowing that tribulation worketh patience; And patience, experience; and experience, hope:

Gateway to Health: Confidence

Pss. 118:8 “It is better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in man.”

Confidence

Throughout scripture, I can find dozens of verses building me with the confidence I need to move forward. Ones where God promises to never let me down in times of trouble (and when there is no trouble also). 

As a child, I lacked confidence and had very low self-esteem. I had no confidence in moving from one day to the next. Suicidal thoughts were my companions throughout many years of my life. Venturing into a strained marriage as a child at seventeen, left me carrying the burden of a mental illness that I felt consumed him more than me. I told myself that I was the strong one. In hindsight I realize I was just as crazy as him. 

My first sexual encounter with him was that of statutory rape as I was fifteen and he was nineteen. But since I had been sexually abused years prior, I didn’t know the difference in sex and love they meshed like clouds and sun. Sex down by the grainy railroad tracks was not my idea of an ideal love story in the making but I went on for twenty years married to him all in the name of love. I guess I was as warped as him. My question all along was, would God save me? Would He get me out of this mess I got myself into? 

God enabled me to be free of the disaster of a marriage with a young child in tow and an angel that had passed over when I was sixteen. My hard knocks crippling marriage would have come to an end even if I was the only one who saw the enduring mental illness that carried the marriage into the roadblock that awaited us. 

Confidence was never my friend. I saw other girls, and then women look like torches in the darkened night, going forward with their hair blowing in the wind. They were free to carry the light and they did so with grace and confidence even if their inner turmoil was present, they had families supporting them, friends surrounding their inner circle, and they might have had a God that guided them. I don't know but from the outside looking in, they were the epitome of confidence.

Matt. 18:20 “For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them.”

My fairytale was never so elegant. Mine was crawling in the pits of ashes, clawing my way from one disaster to another. Yes, I had God by my side, but what I didn’t have was two or three gathered. I was alone and lonely in my mind most of my childhood and adult life and the fight was my own while everyone else was floating forward in life. I was scraping my knees to get by, nothing more; I lived only to one day die.

Then in 2002 things began to change. Life was breathed into me. I felt a new reason to live and that was the fairytale kind of love that knocked on my door; all I had to do was leave everything (EVERYTHING, except my child) behind and go forward. I was no longer on my knees; I was being whisked away by the light and love that other people, the floaters, experienced. Leaving the alcohol and drug-induced dysfunctional family behind was a little easier than I  had ever imagined. 

To say that the next fifteen years were an easy breeze would not be true. I had to adapt to a new way of living; new family to embrace. Living six years in Texas was just the cocoon phase of my metamorphosis. I would be part of a team, him and I; I would be enmeshed in my dream of the writing world, I would love and be loved back, maybe for the first time in my life! Granted my family back home loved me, to an extent, I was out of sight and thus out of their mind. 

My heart and life grew ten sizes too big when he and I were forced to move to Nebraska, the hometown of my hubby and his ever-loving God enriched family. This was everything I ever sought in life, to love and be loved. I had online friends who grew into a family to me; I had spiritual friends who I knew were only brought to me by the hand of God himself. I had family that was close by and that accepted me with all my quirkiness and tales in tow, they all loved me!

This might sound a little crazy coming out of left field but this disease is just one of the best things ever to happen to me. How many of you can say that? I was given a second chance to embrace life. Change the things I KNEW were wrong. I'm allowing people to see that there is confidence in being supported one way or another. Support is not people saying, ‘Oh I’m so sorry this is happening to you,’ support is people watching you walk through the coals of fire and standing on the sidelines saying they know you can do it, thatta girl, way to go!

When this diagnosis smacked me in the face I wanted to live like never before. I wanted God to use me for His purpose and maybe this time with the support of spiritual friends and marital family, and my niece Sara from back home, I wouldn’t be alone in my walk. They would surround me with the support I needed and I would now be the torchbearer walking forward in confidence leading them with the Light I carry.

Pss 118: 5-6 “I called upon the Lord in distress: the Lord answered me, and set me in a large place. The Lord is on my side; I will not fear: what can man do unto me?”

Me - Images

Prov. 15:31 "The ear that heareth the reproof of life abideth among the wise."

This was me at three years old. What a cutie I was. They were my favorite slippers!

I was about 37 or 38 in this picture. It's a guess.

I was about 40 here

I'm 49 in our wedding photo!

51 years old. This was 8-21-17. Eclipse gazing

Summer of '17 and 40 lbs lighter than my wedding photo! 

God has been very good to me giving me a second chance to change the mess I made out of life.

Prov. 21:21 "He that followeth after righteousness and mercy findeth life, righteousness, and honour."

Defining Moments

Job 30:18 “By the great force of my disease is my garment changed: it bindeth me about as the collar of my coat.”

Defining Moments

I will not allow an illness to define me. I will not allow the world to shape me and I can’t let people define the most intimate moments of my life. I’ve been taking a sort of break this week allowing my thoughts to be moved forward in a rush to the raging waterfall where they can be forced over the edge and led out to sea.

It seems the rabid heat wave of July has come to an end. This is where I mention once again that Nebraska has had an extremely mild summer give or take a couple of weeks in the lower nineties and a week in the upper nineties, with sporadic rain and nary a storm. Cool air crept in like the baby raccoons invading the property just moseying around to see what they can get into. The welcome cooler temps filled the night air and we rarely got above seventy in the evenings then the beautiful seventies temperatures arrived in our daytime hours beginning August first.

My defining summer moments have been shaped by a garden I didn’t plant but turned out beautiful anyway, new chores that have fallen on my lap because my son who used to do them got a full-time job, and then there’s the full-time employment that my son anxiously needed and received.  

I think 2017 will be a host of defining moments for me and the year isn’t even close to being over. Changes that are taking place, lifestyles uprooted, routines broken like the once fragile eggs that they were. Life is all about changes; I think it’s a matter of how you handle each set of circumstances tossed at you. You either catch the water balloon or allow it to shatter, splashing water all over your face.

Relieving stress and toxins has been one of the hardest of my defining moments year. Giving up sugar, processed food, meat, dairy was easy compared to the stress that haunts the days. While prayer and meditation work amazing wonders, wandering in to read my mail or visit facebook drown all of my meditative work. 

I think I failed big time as a parent and without going into detail because my son is very private, I’ll try and leave it at that. My son suffers from anxiety and depression and I’m the one holding the bag to his outlet of emotional outbursts. Then there is me, realizing my failure, and the need to let him go and shape his own future. It is stress I need to be gone if ever I am to heal from this dastardly disease.

A ray of hope shined momentarily when my neighbor moved from the trailer he lived in for six years. I got a little over excited thinking my son could rent the place. Boy, visions of a peace-filled transition washed over me but were slowly diminished by further inspection of the place. The place needs a lot of work and my landlord hasn’t gotten back to me on whether he is willing to do the much-needed maintenance of the place. By law, I believe he has to take care of them, but out here in the middle of nowhere, there is no law. I’m not willing to risk losing our very affordable housing (a house not a trailer) to push for mandatory maintenance so my son can get out of the house.

So, I continue in a toxic environment trying to heal what has been a life-altering diagnosis and has become a most notable defining moment in my life thus far. I never thought of my husband and son as the toxins that need to be remedied in my life but here I am the medium between two toxic people and trying to heal a toxic illness. 

I sit here and watch my husbands’ family move through life. They’re the good Christian family and all that entails in your mind when you think of when you think of a good Christian family. You know, the Leave It To Beaver June Cleaver kind of people? Yeah, when his mom sees my husband she hugs him like she hasn’t seen him for years and you can see all the love pass between the two. My sister-in-law has two kids that blend so well with her husbands’ two kids you’d think they were blood, but no, they’re more than blood siblings, they’re family!

It’s amazing to watch as an outsider city-gal. Sure I married into this great family but I’m out in the middle of nowhere as the Cleaver family moves on in a time-lapse fashion, and I sit here as the observer of two toxic people trying to live under the same roof. It’s an unneeded stress at a time I need no stress to add to my inflammatory body.

I have unmedicated pains many of my days. Not from this illness, from my arthritis and psoriasis. Trying to put bandages on a lifelong illness like psoriasis is not going as I had planned, and my arthritis flare ups keep me in check, wanting to do certain things but unable to just jump into gear. This is an interesting journey, to say the least. I still trudge through the pain, take breaks when needed and am still overwhelmed by simple things like visiting a social media site to visit with my Spiritual Family. Lord knows I've been dealt a raw deal with no REAL family to call my own. I think that's why He placed me here.

On the twenty-fifth of this month, it will have been eight months since I received the diagnosis of this life altering disease. Eight months of no processed food, no sugar, carbs, grains, etc. etc. and I long for the day I can just eat a piece of pizza without worrying that THAT will be my demise. Joni passed due to a slice of pizza! Hey, if I can’t have a sense of humor through all of this, shoot me now! 

My Lord has wrapped His blanketed touch around me for my protection and as the year of defining moment’s speed on, I’m cradled by His love! So if you don’t see me or my name for a couple of days at a time, know that I’m out here struggling to get through the day and always keep me in your prayer. I feel as if it were not for your continued prayers, I might as well pick out my urn now. 

1 Cor. 15:51 “Behold, I shew you a mystery; We shall not all sleep, but we shall all be changed”

My Lil Primrose

Matt. 5:6 “Blessed are they which do hunger and thirst after righteousness: for they shall be filled.”

My Lil Primrose

It’s been a little over a month now since my diagnosis of the illness. January 25th will be forever etched in my mind but as February 25th came and went I almost forgot it had been a month that had passed and seemed like this crud had slithered into my body quite some time ago.

Well, actually it has resided in me for quite some time. The lump became known in December of that terrible year of 2015 that I had three deaths in the family, including my father. It was a tiny and small lump and I paid it no mind thinking it was just a cyst of some sort. They happen sometimes when you’re pre-menopausal. 

Everybody says don’t go to google, so I didn’t because google searches always lead to death in some way, so I steered clear as I mended from the losses. I knew the lump had to be taken care of but it was not in my hands, God held this the entire time and made the moves necessary for it to be diagnosed when the timing was perfect.

People probably wonder if I feared the imminent diagnosis and I can say, no, not really. I’m sure some small part of fear was lurking in there somewhere but when you’ve overcome so many hurdles like I have in my life, you kind of pretty much place the fear in God’s hands, have faith and trust Him with where everything goes.  

What I do fear is a system that tries to force their self-righteous indignation down my throat. A friend reminded me that I am doing battle with worldly-minded people and it hit me, that’s exactly what these doctors are, worldly-minded trying to push their worldly beliefs on me, the weak at the moment child of God. I stood up, looked in the mirror and repeated what I said to myself out loud, “I AM A CHILD OF GOD.” 

I remember a couple years back when I had to have my teeth pulled and the dentist gave me nothing for pain and no antibiotics to go home with to care for myself. He just told me to ‘gargle with salt water and let the body heal thyself’. Kind of shocking, eh? A doctor who don’t believe in pacifying his patients with drugs?

This was around the time I was diagnosed with lower lumbar facet joint arthritis. I believe this was the time that the c-cells were awakened. No, I’m not one hundred percent sure, they could have been triggered by the loss of my daughter thirteen years ago and they just slowly progressed to where I was most weak. All my research this month has pointed to stress and fear being underlying culprits in the c-cells stretching, yawning, then attacking! A one-two punch, so to speak. The above link is an informative six-part series on healing cancer. 

Throughout these years, I’ve been healing, growing and mending. I’ve grown in my faith, become stronger in my belief, and held fast to the garments of Christ's robe dangling in my face as I crawl toward Him to get one gentle touch. 

I’m reminded of the temptation of Christ where Jesus was being tempted by satan. He offered him the world, just like my doctors are offering me, life, a precious few years added to my life if I walk with them and go to their healing place. This diagnosis is my temptation, this is where they instill fear in me so I walk with them, but no, I am reminded of Jesus’ words.

Matt. 4: 1-11 “Then was Jesus led up of the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted of the devil. And when he had fasted forty days and forty nights, he was afterward an hungred. And when the tempter came to him, he said, If thou be the Son of God, command that these stones be made bread. But he answered and said, It is written, Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceedeth out of the mouth of God. Then the devil taketh him up into the holy city, and setteth him on a pinnacle of the temple, And saith unto him, If thou be the Son of God, cast thyself down: for it is written, He shall give his angels charge concerning thee: and in their hands they shall bear thee up, lest at any time thou dash thy foot against a stone. Jesus said unto him, It is written again, Thou shalt not tempt the Lord thy God. Again, the devil taketh him up into an exceeding high mountain, and sheweth him all the kingdoms of the world, and the glory of them; And saith unto him, All these things will I give thee, if thou wilt fall down and worship me. Then saith Jesus unto him, Get thee hence, Satan: for it is written, Thou shalt worship the Lord thy God, and him only shalt thou serve. Then the devil leaveth him, and, behold, angels came and ministered unto him.”

As everyone knows me and who has read my blog over the years, they know I’ve done a Lenten series. This year I was distracted from that with this illness but lo, look at the past month. I have somewhat been forced to fast; no carbs and no sugar. I am being weakened by the doctor's dire prognosis, but I AM STRONG, I need you to know that THIS is my temptation! This is satan trying to lure me into his pit and my only strength is coming from the spiritual family that God has chosen to surround me with prayer at this time and Jesus Himself being the only set of footprints I see on the shore of healing. 

Primrose. You may remember a month ago my mother-in-law coming out to see me; she was bearing a gift of the primrose plant. It was a sad little plant wilting and hanging low. My MIL informed me the next day that she was sorry the plant looked so sad and she’d have to replace the little fella. I told her not to worry about, this lil guy was going to be just fine! 

Each day as its leaves curled and petals fell from the stem I tended the small tender plant with sunshine, love, and care. As I write today my lil survivor is now the beauty I knew it would be. He overcame the sadness with love and care and now has NEW flowers to show me as it basks in the Son! 

My visit to the Dollar Store this weekend found me purchasing a door hanger that said, 

“To plant a garden is to believe in tomorrow.” I BELIEVE in tomorrow!

God bless each and every one of you as you are faced with your own temptations and know that the Lord your God is with you all the way! 

Matt. 5:8 “Blessed are the pure in heart: for they shall see God.”

Quotation Saturday ~ Change ~ Faith

1 Cor. 15:51 “Behold, I shew you a mystery; We shall not all sleep, but we shall all be changed,”

CHANGE

“We can't be afraid of change. You may feel very secure in the pond that you are in, but if you never venture out of it, you will never know that there is such a thing as an ocean, a sea. Holding onto something that is good for you now, may be the very reason why you don't have something better.” 
― C. JoyBell C.

“Incredible change happens in your life when you decide to take control of what you do have power over instead of craving control over what you don't.” 
― Steve Maraboli

“We are not trapped or locked up in these bones. No, no. We are free to change. And love changes us. And if we can love one another, we can break open the sky.” 
― Walter Mosley

“You can’t save others from themselves because those who make a perpetual muddle of their lives don’t appreciate your interfering with the drama they’ve created. They want your poor-sweet-baby sympathy, but they don’t want to change.” 
― Sue Grafton

GROWTH

“One of the great liabilities of history is that all too many people fail to remain awake through great periods of social change. Every society has its protectors of status quo and its fraternities of the indifferent who are notorious for sleeping through revolutions. Today, our very survival depends on our ability to stay awake, to adjust to new ideas, to remain vigilant and to face the challenge of change.” 
― Martin Luther King Jr.

“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.” 
― Anaïs Nin

“We are all alone, born alone, die alone, and—in spite of True Romance magazines—we shall all someday look back on our lives and see that, in spite of our company, we were alone the whole way. I do not say lonely—at least, not all the time—but essentially, and finally, alone. This is what makes your self-respect so important, and I don't see how you can respect yourself if you must look in the hearts and minds of others for your happiness.” 
― Hunter S. Thompson

“Your hand opens and closes, opens and closes. If it were always a fist or always stretched open, you would be paralysed. Your deepest presence is in every small contracting and expanding, the two as beautifully balanced and coordinated as birds' wings.” 
― Rumi

LIVING

“I beg you, to have patience with everything unresolved in your heart and to try to love the questions themselves as if they were locked rooms or books written in a very foreign language. Don’t search for the answers, which could not be given to you now, because you would not be able to live them. And the point is to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps then, someday far in the future, you will gradually, without even noticing it, live your way into the answer.” 
― Rainer Maria Rilke

“Life will break you. Nobody can protect you from that, and living alone won't either, for solitude will also break you with its yearning. You have to love. You have to feel. It is the reason you are here on earth. You are here to risk your heart. You are here to be swallowed up. And when it happens that you are broken, or betrayed, or left, or hurt, or death brushes near, let yourself sit by an apple tree and listen to the apples falling all around you in heaps, wasting their sweetness. Tell yourself you tasted as many as you could.” 
― Louise Erdrich

“She is free in her wildness, she is a wanderess, a drop of free water. She knows nothing of borders and cares nothing for rules or customs. 'Time' for her isn’t something to fight against. Her life flows clean, with passion, like fresh water.” 
― Roman Payne

“People are strange: They are constantly angered by trivial things, but on a major matter like totally wasting their lives, they hardly seem to notice.” 
― Charles Bukowski

FAITH

“I want neither a terrorist spirituality that keeps me in a perpetual state of fright about being in right relationship with my heavenly Father nor a sappy spirituality that portrays God as such a benign teddy bear that there is no aberrant behavior or desire of mine that he will not condone. I want a relationship with the Abba of Jesus, who is infinitely compassionate with my brokenness and at the same time an awesome, incomprehensible, and unwieldy Mystery. ” 
― Brennan Manning

“Fear is the glue that keeps you stuck. Faith is the solvent that sets you free.” 
― Shannon L. Alder

“Faith is not so much something we believe; faith is something we live.” 
― Joseph B. Wirthlin

“We never know how God will answer our prayers, but we can expect that He will get us involved in His plan for the answer. If we are true intercessors, we must be ready to take part in God’s work on behalf of the people for whom we pray.” 
― Corrie ten Boom

Abandoning The Seed Within

Jer. 2:21 “Yet I had planted thee a noble vine, wholly a right seed: how then art thou turned into the degenerate plant of a strange vine unto me?”

Have you ever felt like just giving up on God, tossing your faith and all that you’ve built with your faith right out the door? You know, because of all the pain he allows you to go through doesn’t seem worth the trials that you have to endure on a daily basis? Yeah, me neither.

I accepted Jesus as my Lord and Savior when I was a young teen and life has never been the same, it’s been a roller coaster ride, going up and down ever since. There have been times when I thought (briefly) that this fight just wasn’t worth the suffering. The time, the dedication, the daily nurturing; accepting the Lord felt more like having a full-time job, twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week, just like having a child.

What? Accepting the Lord felt like having a child? Yes! What, do you think, you just get to utter words like ‘I accept you Lord’ and everything goes smoothly from there on out? I’m sorry friends, but if you think that then no wonder your life is all fun and games, no worries, no commitment, just playtime all the time. Be honest, that isn’t your life at all is it?

If you want Jesus in your life there is a commitment just like having a child, which you don’t get to toss away whenever you feel like. Just like when you find out your pregnant (or your wife), you make a commitment to taking on the responsibility of that child, raising him or her in an upright manner, feeding his soul and nurturing his spirit or just toss the life away via an abortion. With free will, the CHOICE is yours. If you’ve never married or know what having a child is like, the seed of God is in you also. He doesn’t abandon anyone for anything just because He feels like it and doesn’t have the time for you.

Many parents take on the responsibility of keeping the child, whether planned or unplanned but many are not seriously ready for the time and commitment that it takes to raise a child. That’s why so many births are met with abandonment after the baby is born, left in dumpsters, thrown off bridges, just disposed of because they were too hard to take care of and didn’t realize that this one time of lustful pleasure was going to turn out to be a lifetime commitment. Note: Pleasures cost.

John 15:5 “I am the vine, ye are the branches: He that abideth in me, and I in him, the same bringeth forth much fruit: for without me ye can do nothing.”

The God cell is inside you at birth, a seed that you dispose of or tend and allow to grow through nurturing. Some people feel the seed and know it is there, others don’t know what the origin festering inside is and don’t want to know so they try and abort the kernel by putting chemicals in their body that will destroy the tiny bud or they ignore the seed completely allowing the weeds to smother the grain as it grows. We all know what happens when a weed grows, right? It takes a long time people to annihilate the seed that God planted in you at birth. You can try to rid yourself of the essence burning inside but the root is never dead.

When you accept God, it is like having a child, an embryo within you. You recognize the spirit that God planted as a blooming cluster of flowers not the false covering of weeds. You nurture the seedling with the Word of God until the foundation, with time, endurance, patience and love has become rooted, and slowly painstakingly allowed to climb the vine to flourish into a blossoming stem that grows along the Vine of the Lord. We were all meant to be flowers in the garden of life. Some allowed the weeds (satan) to strangle our beautiful bud but know this, the flower is still inside of you waiting to grow and become the beauty you see in a botanical garden. You can never abandon the seed within.

Luke 22:18 “For I say unto you, I will not drink of the fruit of the vine, until the kingdom of God shall come.”

Belief vs. Knowledge

Ex. 31:3 “And I have filled him with the spirit of God, in wisdom, and in understanding, and in knowledge, and in all manner of workmanship,”

“I no longer want to be a Christian. Oh, I want to follow Christ and stick to my beliefs but to be a person who calls herself a Christian I feel like I have to put on an armored coat while all other Christians walk around pretending to be a Christian and wearing the face mask the rest of the week. They are the Sunday only Christians I spoke of in another post.”

Please note I do have on the full armor of the Lord and that the term ‘Christian’ I found only three times in the bible:

Acts.11:26 “And when he had found him, he brought him unto Antioch. And it came to pass, that a whole year they assembled themselves with the church, and taught much people. And the disciples were called Christians first in Antioch.”

Acts.26:28 “Then Agrippa said unto Paul, Almost thou persuadest me to be a Christian.”

1Pet.4:16 “Yet if any man suffer as a Christian, let him not be ashamed; but let him glorify God on this behalf.”

Also, note that I make the statement above to see a reaction, not as a statement of me giving up on everything I believe in. And you just know there will be more posts, so hang in there before judging me. I’ll say this also, if any man (or woman) suffer as a Christian, let him glorify God on this behalf. 

Belief vs. Knowledge - I can see this topic is not one that I’m equipped to just spew out an answer of the differences in a few hundred words, so links will be added so you can read your heart out. 

Belief vs. Knowledge an interesting read.

Knowledge definition: 1. facts, information, and skills acquired by a person through experience or education; the theoretical or practical understanding of a subject.
2. awareness or familiarity gained by experience of a fact or situation.

Belief: 1. an acceptance that a statement is true or that something exists.
2. trust, faith, or confidence in someone or something.

My belief comes from knowledge not via books, or an encyclopedia or the internet, not from scientists or ministers, it comes from what I’ve experienced and know to be true to ME. That is what makes my strong belief different and that is that it comes from hands-on, visual, and sometimes spiritual experiences that have happened to me in my life. After an experience, I would check a book to see if I’m crazy or not and more times than not my experience is not much unlike many of the people that I’ve read about in the bible and others who have been on the same journey.

Let me just say, before everyone goes off thinking I’m losing my faith, satan himself has tried to shake my faith and I’m still here writing about what has been MY experience, in a nutshell, I AM NOT LOSING MY FAITH.

My post is not here to sway you to think MY way, my post is here to have you and you alone think, to search, to read, to feel for yourself what is the truth that lies within YOU.

Yesterday’s post about agnostics vs. atheist struck a nerve in veins I never thought reachable. The journey I’m on has me meeting many different people, ones I don’t understand and subjects I need to do a little research on so I don’t come off as someone who don’t know what they’re talking about. 

My post yesterday brought about a slew of links, worthy of a share.

Are all religions the same? 

Hypocrisy in the Church: 

What IS the Church? 

Church bullies? 

What NOT to say to someone who has been hurt by the church: 

As with all of my writing, I aim to gain knowledge, to grow as a person and to share with you my experience along the way. I’m not writing so you can tell me I’m right or wrong, just as your opinion to me is not right or wrong, it is growth, internal or external growth is what we are all here for on this planet. Growth is the very reason we were planted.

My suffering is a part of that growth. I don’t announce to the world that I’m struggling or suffering to gain pity, I offer it to you so you can see my growth through my suffering. You get a visual of what my suffering entails then the further writing of blog posts show you how I as a human being have grown through the pain. 

I am human. I am a sinner. I am the very hypocrite you fear (not for my lies but for times I may judge wrongly) yet the one you long to speak to and embrace. I am a living testament to MY belief through the knowledge that I gained via experience. In truth… I AM ME!

2 Thes. 2:13 “But we are bound to give thanks alway to God for you, brethren beloved of the Lord, because God hath from the beginning chosen you to salvation through sanctification of the Spirit and belief of the truth:”

Hosanna - Hillsong

Hosanna - sung by Hillsong

Any music video I post is a song that touched me very deeply as I was and am growing with our Lord. 

This song Hosanna inspired poetry, it inspired a new step, a new walk with faith, love, hope and growth. May this song touch you as it has touched me.

As Holy Week is about to begin tomorrow with Palm Sunday, I thought this song was very fitting for the occasion. 

God Bless You all!

Spiritual Maturity

Being mature in Christ is progressing in Christ not perfection in Christ. No one can be perfect in Christ because we all fail. We are all sinners bound to this world in imperfection. We can only work at being sanctified by Christ and growing maturely with Christ as your inner man takes on a change, transforming you into a man rooted in LOVE.

Eph 3:14 – 21
For this cause I bow my knees unto the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ,
Of whom the whole family in heaven and earth is named,
That he would grant you, according to the riches of his glory, to be strengthened with might by his Spirit in the inner man;
That Christ may dwell in your hearts by faith; that ye, being rooted and grounded in love,
May be able to comprehend with all saints what is the breadth, and length, and depth, and height;
And to know the love of Christ, which passeth knowledge, that ye might be filled with all the fulness of God.
Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us,
Unto him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus throughout all ages, world without end. Amen.

Paul speaks of the inner man. Why do you think he would do that? He wants us to be rooted in LOVE and progress in spiritual maturity. He wants us to be aware of the power within us to become spiritually mature.

As an adult, we set out to sea on a sailboat, in a rowboat you’d surely die, we have no plan but to sail across the ocean and let God guide us to wherever he wants us to go. The thing is, we have sails for a reason, to catch the wind so we can be directed into the setting sun. The Holy Spirit is the breath of the wind that carries us to our destination.

As a child we’re set here in life out to sea on a rowboat. Our parents are our guides for a time until we mature and get a sailboat (progression of our inner man toward Christ). Some of us sail blindly. Some intensely. Some just lay on the beach not wanting to sail or progress any further, content with who they are and are happy going nowhere.

Sometimes in life I feel as if I’m drifting, no guidance, no direction, sails put away and I just bask in the sun, until I’m fried. We are called to be the salt of the earth and I wonder if that is why the sea was made full of salt. Is the sea an analogy of what we are to become? We’re drifters in that turbulent realm, we need the sails, we need the wind, and only with those two can we find direction to become the salt and light of the world.

As we mature in Christ, sail across the sea, fill our inner man with the fullness of God, only then can we be a light or salt to the world. We add the flavor that God has filled us with and carry the load to the shore and share with the lonely soul lying on the beach content in going nowhere. We offer him the hope in Christ so that he too wants to sail across the ocean to see what we’re talking about.

Phil. 3:20 “For our conversation is in heaven; from whence also we look for the Saviour, the Lord Jesus Christ:”

As we converse on the shores of beached humans we have to be ready to provide a strong worthy sailing ship that will guide the people out to sea, given the instruments to sail, and being filled with Christ, the wind will blow carrying them where they need to go. 

As you have been transformed into the maturity of Christ, rooted in LOVE you can relay a message of your growth of your inner man. If you are still full of hate, you have not been transformed into the maturity it takes to bring forth a powerful message. 

Pastor Mike says it like this: “You’ve been given a car to drive with a really powerful engine, but you sit behind the wheel with the key in the ignition. You don’t want to rev the engine. When you do, that is your INNER Man growing.”

We have been given a powerful message; we sit behind the Word throwing out bits and pieces (we read and believe) but have not been filled (spiritually matured) enough to rev our engines. And once we start the engine, we don’t know where to go. Our GPS has failed. Let me assure you, God does not fail; God is faithful.

Once you set sail, open up and let the wind carry you across the sea, you’ll feel the wind like fingers running through your hair, brushing all doubt and fear into the water. Yes, there will be storms but you will be so full of Christ that any storm you sail into, you too will be able to (metaphorically) walk on water.

Steven and I are heading into some turbulent water. He lost his job on Friday and my testimony is that we are blowing through the wind of change. I may be spiritually mature in Christ but it is a continual learning process guided by God of inner growth. Into His arms, I sail. 

May the Lord carry you through turbulent times and place you safely on land to be the salt and light in the world. To Him be the Glory!

Lyrics from Cornerstone by Hillsong:

When Darkness seems to hide His face

I rest on His unchanging grace

In every high and stormy gale

My anchor holds within the veil

My anchor holds within the veil

Christ alone; cornerstone

Weak made strong; in the Saviour's love

Through the storm, He is Lord

Lord of all

He is Lord

Lord of all

Quotation Saturday ~ Change

Job 10:17 “Thou renewest thy witnesses against me, and increasest thine indignation upon me; changes and war are against me.”

CHANGE

“Nothing is so painful to the human mind as a great and sudden change.” 
― Mary Shelley

“Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don't resist them; that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.” 
― Lao Tzu

“When we least expect it, life sets us a challenge to test our courage and willingness to change; at such a moment, there is no point in pretending that nothing has happened or in saying that we are not yet ready. The challenge will not wait. Life does not look back. A week is more than enough time for us to decide whether or not to accept our destiny.” 
― Paulo Coelho

“We can't be afraid of change. You may feel very secure in the pond that you are in, but if you never venture out of it, you will never know that there is such a thing as an ocean, a sea. Holding onto something that is good for you now, may be the very reason why you don't have something better.” 
― C. JoyBell C.

GROWTH

“Suffering has been stronger than all other teaching, and has taught me to understand what your heart used to be. I have been bent and broken, but - I hope - into a better shape.” 
― Charles Dickens

“Out of your vulnerabilities will come your strength.” 
― Sigmund Freud

“This life therefore is not righteousness, but growth in righteousness, not health, but healing, not being but becoming, not rest but exercise. We are not yet what we shall be, but we are growing toward it, the process is not yet finished, but it is going on, this is not the end, but it is the road. All does not yet gleam in glory, but all is being purified.” 
― Martin Luther

“The lotus is the most beautiful flower, whose petals open one by one. But it will only grow in the mud. In order to grow and gain wisdom, first you must have the mud --- the obstacles of life and its suffering. ... The mud speaks of the common ground that humans share, no matter what our stations in life. ... Whether we have it all or we have nothing, we are all faced with the same obstacles: sadness, loss, illness, dying and death. If we are to strive as human beings to gain more wisdom, more kindness and more compassion, we must have the intention to grow as a lotus and open each petal one by one. ” 
― Goldie Hawn

CHALLENGE

“At first, they'll only dislike what you say, but the more correct you start sounding the more they'll dislike you.” 
― Criss Jami

“When you're following your inner voice, doors tend to eventually open for you, even if they mostly slam at first.” 
― Kelly Cutrone

“But today our very survival depends on our ability to stay awake, to adjust to new ideas, to remain vigilant and to face the challenge of change. The large house in which we live demands that we transform this world-wide neighborhood into a world – wide brotherhood. Together we must learn to live as brothers or together we will be forced to perish as fools.

We must work passionately and indefatigably to bridge the gulf between our scientific progress and our moral progress. One of the great problems of mankind is that we suffer from a poverty of the spirit which stands in glaring contrast to our scientific and technological abundance. The richer we have become materially, the poorer we have become morally and spiritually.” 
― Martin Luther King Jr.

STRENGTH & COURAGE

“Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.” 
― Winston S. Churchill

“Courage is the most important of all the virtues because without courage, you can't practice any other virtue consistently.” 
― Maya Angelou

“You cannot swim for new horizons until you have courage to lose sight of the shore.” 
― William Faulkner

“There are so many ways to be brave in this world. Sometimes bravery involves laying down your life for something bigger than yourself, or for someone else. Sometimes it involves giving up everything you have ever known, or everyone you have ever loved, for the sake of something greater.

But sometimes it doesn't.

Sometimes it is nothing more than gritting your teeth through pain, and the work of every day, the slow walk toward a better life. 

That is the sort of bravery I must have now.” 
― Veronica Roth

“Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.” 
― Lao Tzu

“In the depth of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer.” 
― Albert Camus

1 Cor. 15:51 “Behold, I shew you a mystery; We shall not all sleep, but we shall all be changed,”

Reflection

Reflection

“There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.” 

1 John 4:18

My forty days of reflection has begun with the beginning of the Lenten season. Some people will announce what they are doing for the Feast of Reflection, some will not give the Fast of Sacrifice a second thought, and others will wonder what all this Christian hokey pokey is about. Well turn yourself around and I’ll tell you.

Isa. 58:6-8 “Is not this the fast that I have chosen? to loose the bands of wickedness, to undo the heavy burdens, and to let the oppressed go free, and that ye break every yoke?
Is it not to deal thy bread to the hungry, and that thou bring the poor that are cast out to thy house? when thou seest the naked, that thou cover him; and that thou hide not thyself from thine own flesh?
Then shall thy light break forth as the morning, and thine health shall spring forth speedily: and thy righteousness shall go before thee; the glory of the LORD shall be thy reward.”

Lent, just like Advent is a highly misunderstood Holy Time of the year. Many people assume it is just something Catholics partake in and it’s a ritual they WON’T take part in. Some people will tout that they reflect and sacrifice all year so they won’t partake but I’m here to tell you, it is SO much more!

Lent is a forty-day period of prayer, penance and fasting. It is a season of sacrifice, spiritual exercise and renewal. My season begins on Ash Wednesday and lasts until Easter Sunday the day I celebrate my New Year and my spirit is mentally refreshed and healed.

Sacrifice – It can also mean fasting, not always celebrated with the refusal of meat, unless meat is a hindrance in your life. Sacrifice means to give up something that is hindering your spiritual growth. To REALLY sacrifice is not hiding on days you feel like it and slipping into old routines because no one is watching. Can you imagine giving up politics, hate and judging of people like blacks, Jews, Christians and yes even Muslims for forty-days? Imagine giving up Social Walls for forty-days. Giving up sex for forty-days. There are so many things YOU can give up and sacrifice for your Lord.

This sacrifice is all about YOU and God! A forty-day sacrifice is extremely hard and grueling, sometimes painful and feels like it is punishment but this is the LEAST we can do for a man we believe was whipped and had skin shredded, falling off the bone and hung on the cross for US!

Prayer – This isn’t the normal prayer you pray when someone says they need prayer and you say, ‘praying’. This season of prayer is deep meditative prayer for YOU, for all you hate, for all you judge, for strength in lasting forty-days. This is a cleansing prayer feast between you and God. 

Renewal – After the season is over and you awake on Easter Sunday there is a refreshing, honorable feeling that overwhelms you knowing you made it the forty-days without fail. That is the secret. Not failing. We fail all year but in these forty days WE DO NOT FAIL! That is where the sacrifice, prayer and renewal of spirit comes from and washes over as if you yourself bathed in the river Jordan.

My prayer for you is to know and understand what this season is all about. I pray that you know and understand the true meaning of sacrifice and that you see and feel internal growth by the Rising of the Lord. 

May God walk with you all and bless you in more ways than one!

Because I am loved by God… I can be grateful for another day of life.

1 John 4:19 “We love him, because he first loved us.”

Spring Cleaning My Soul

Job 37:21 “And now men see not the bright light which is in the clouds: but the wind passeth, and cleanseth them.”

The tiny seed knew that in order to grow it had to be set in the dirt, covered in darkness, and struggle to see the light! I myself have plunged through the darkness as it tried to envelope my soul, I stretched out toward the light and that is the time I burst forth with growth. The dirt (darkness) enriched me and cleansed my soul.

I know it is early for Spring-cleaning but it is never too early for cleaning of the soul of all the leftover fragments scattered behind from the previous year. With the doozy of a year behind me, the dismantling of the Christmas season, I’m faced with a liberating feeling of cleanliness. That is what happens when you clean up and put away the old and make way for the new. 

Only five days into the New Year and already I’m feeling the presence of change, so much so that it is moving along in a smooth flow: of words, of actions, of deeds and of promise. This year is setting itself up to be a rapid succession of energy that spills out into my writing, my cleaning and my meditating. I’m in awe of the visible transition.

Some people would rather wait until spring to clean out closets, toss away old clothing, get rid of unused stuff and junk, but me, I do my spring-cleaning when my soul calls me to make some semblance of this clutter that has filled these four walls. I didn’t start off the new year wanting to clean and shake this house up and get rid of the excess baggage tagging along collecting cobwebs. It just came upon me as I slept, hugged me when I woke, and moved me into action.

Granted my back is in no better shape than it was last year but this year I’m not letting my disability alter my active lifestyle I had before this thing called arthritis gripped my NOT-OLD back! I have not even reached the half a century mark and my back thinks it is moving into the seventies. Since my mind is still back there in time, where the thirty-year mark saw the seedling spurt with growing pains, now my nearly half a century old mind is giving a speeding ticket to my body and telling it to ‘hold on now’! But hi ho silver and away I go growing like a newly planted seed.

I’m not one to hoard because I learned quite a few years ago that they are all materials and can be gone in the blink of an eye and all you have to hold onto is memories of the physical hindrances, sometimes called artifacts of your past. This ‘stuff’ that I’m soul-cleaning is newly acquired stuff lodged in my mind as new experiences, new thoughts, and brighter comfort zones. 

I have a tendency to hold onto my old ways, my own pattern of thinking, not allowing the new age of things to play games in the basketball court of my mind. My soul-cleaning is going to consist of closing the doors on the negative thoughts that sometime ensnare me in their web and cloud my God thoughts as satan has set out to do on this earth. 

If I seem to be living my life out there on a cloud, distanced from what some call reality, it is my way of clinging to the new growth that is before me awaiting the springtime air, the season of MY New Year, and the bringing forth the solidarity of strength in my eternity. If I dip into the pool of confusion, like so many cling to this day and age, I will lose sight of my self worth and become stagnant in a clouded puddle. 

Pss. 91:1 “He that dwelleth in the secret place of the most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.”

I will continue on the path of soul-cleaning, bouncing back refreshed and renewed with a new perspective on life. Some will enjoy the change, some will hide because they fear change, some will embrace my soul-cleansing and come along for the ride.

John 15:3 “Now ye are clean through the word which I have spoken unto you.”

May God bless YOU on whatever journey YOU are embarking on this year. 

Quotation Saturday ~ The Year of Change

Matt. 6:34 “Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.” 

NEW YEAR

“Hope
Smiles from the threshold of the year to come, 
Whispering 'it will be happier'...” 
~ Alfred Lord Tennyson

“For last year's words belong to last year's language 
And next year's words await another voice.” 
~ T.S. Eliot, Four Quartets

“I hope that in this year to come, you make mistakes.

Because if you are making mistakes, then you are making new things, trying new things, learning, living, pushing yourself, changing yourself, changing your world. You're doing things you've never done before, and more importantly, you're Doing Something.

So that's my wish for you, and all of us, and my wish for myself. Make New Mistakes. Make glorious, amazing mistakes. Make mistakes nobody's ever made before. Don't freeze, don't stop, don't worry that it isn't good enough, or it isn't perfect, whatever it is: art, or love, or work or family or life.

Whatever it is you're scared of doing, Do it.

Make your mistakes, next year and forever.” 
~ Neil Gaiman

“A bridge of silver wings stretches from the dead ashes of an unforgiving nightmare
to the jeweled vision of a life started anew.” 
~ Aberjhani

CHANGE

“Be the change that you wish to see in the world.” 
~ Mahatma Gandhi

“Here's to the crazy ones. The misfits. The rebels. The troublemakers. The round pegs in the square holes. The ones who see things differently. They're not fond of rules. And they have no respect for the status quo. You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them. About the only thing you can't do is ignore them. Because they change things. They push the human race forward. And while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius. Because the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do.” 
~ Rob Siltanen

“The world as we have created it is a process of our thinking. It cannot be changed without changing our thinking.” 
~ Albert Einstein

“Yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world. Today I am wise, so I am changing myself.” 
~ Rumi

GROWTH

“The only way that we can live, is if we grow. The only way that we can grow is if we change. The only way that we can change is if we learn. The only way we can learn is if we are exposed. And the only way that we can become exposed is if we throw ourselves out into the open. Do it. Throw yourself.” 
~ C. JoyBell C.

“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.” 
~ Anaïs Nin

“Just because I liked something at one point in time doesn’t mean I’ll always like it, or that I have to go on liking it at all points in time as an unthinking act of loyalty to who I am as a person, based solely on who I was as a person. To be loyal to myself is to allow myself to grow and change, and challenge who I am and what I think. The only thing I am for sure is unsure, and this means I’m growing, and not stagnant or shrinking.” 
~ Jarod Kintz

“My turn shall also come:
I sense the spreading of a wing.” 
~ Osip Mandelstam

SPIRITUAL

“The moon is a loyal companion.
It never leaves. It’s always there, watching, steadfast, knowing us in our light and dark moments, changing forever just as we do. Every day it’s a different version of itself. Sometimes weak and wan, sometimes strong and full of light. The moon understands what it means to be human.
Uncertain. Alone. Cratered by imperfections.” 
~ Tahereh Mafi

“Sometimes our light goes out, but is blown again into instant flame by an encounter with another human being.” 
~ Albert Schweitzer

“That which God said to the rose, and caused it to laugh in full-blown beauty, He said to my heart, and made it a hundred times more beautiful.” 
~ Rumi

“People tend to be generous when sharing their nonsense, fear, and ignorance. And while they seem quite eager to feed you their negativity, please remember that sometimes the diet we need to be on is a spiritual and emotional one. Be cautious with what you feed your mind and soul. Fuel yourself with positivity and let that fuel propel you into positive action.” 
~ Steve Maraboli

“Be faithful in small things because it is in them that your strength lies.” 
~ Mother Teresa

“I sense it in the breath of the morning, the rising of the sun, the brisk cold that kisses my skin; this is the year of change.”
~  Joni

The Echo of Change

Echo, echo, echo…

Life is an echo

What you send out, comes back.

What you sow, you reap

What you give, you get

What you see in others exists in you

Remember, life is an echo

It always gets back to you

So give goodness!

~ Zig Ziglar

This is the year of change. I don’t say this because it is January 1st, I say it because it is an actual fact that has been burning inside me for a few months now. So many people wait for the New Year to make resolutions, only not keep them and then feel the disappointment fester when they fail. I’m not making a resolution here; I feel a life change coming around the corner.

As I climbed into bed last night around ten, I thought of New Years that have passed away like the fallen confetti, gone but not forgotten. I would stand squished between friends and family around Baltimore’s Inner Harbor waiting for the 12 o’clock firework show with a beer in my hand and smoking weed (because with 250,000 people no one could tell where the smell was coming from).

Then as I grew older my light show was sitting in my warm home at the window (no alcohol or drugs), with my niece who loved to come to my house on New Year’s Eve to spend the night and stay awake to watch the fireworks. I lived so close to the Inner Harbor that you could hear the revelers whooping and hollering. Cars would blare horns, kids would clang pots and pans and I just sat still with a smile watching the splendid light show.

As I made my way to Texas in later years, New Years Eve took on a different shape and form. I never anticipated fireworks and often I was in bed before the 12 o’clock ball drop. Not much for New Years rockin’ eve, I had grown and matured. Life became more subdued, no longer did the bottle hold me prisoner. I no longer felt compelled to mark my New Year with booze.  

Now as I mature further as an old fuddy duddy, I don’t understand why people, some who never drink, decide that on New Year’s Eve to take some wine or champagne and drink to the New Year. I think conformist follow what other people do in carrying on traditions. Since I’m not a conformist I see no point in celebratory events to mark the flipping of a calendar page.

I had to do some research and see why; why on earth do we ring in a New Year. Just as I suspected, it is a celebration handed down through other gods. It is solely based on superstition and the human race needing to be a part of ‘the world’ follows along.

I wonder if I’m alone in not wanting to be a part of the ritualistic and occult practices? I wonder if anyone sees nonsense in the eating of beans for good luck, having a drink at midnight to bring on a prosperous new year and other ritualistic traditions handed down by the Babylonians.

My dad used to eat pickled herring on New Years Eve; I used to think clinking a bottle would give me a promise of a good year. They were false illusions that I’ve come to realize over the years. Will my year be hellish if I don’t participate? Will the gods curse my year of growth and change? Are we to follow omens and the occult?

Is it just me who wants to turn the New Year into a flipping of a page as my consuming practice on January first? I knew I was weird but I think I’ve gone and taken it to new heights in my transcending timeline called life. I’m different and I’m okay with that.

Like I said yesterday, my life has been and always will be more spiritual than following rituals and traditions of the past. I like to start my own traditions being as different as they are.

Deut. 18: 9-14 “When thou art come into the land which the LORD thy God giveth thee, thou shalt not learn to do after the abominations of those nations.

There shall not be found among you any one that maketh his son or his daughter to pass through the fire, or that useth divination, or an observer of times, or an enchanter, or a witch,

Or a charmer, or a consulter with familiar spirits, or a wizard, or a necromancer.

For all that do these things are an abomination unto the LORD: and because of these abominations the LORD thy God doth drive them out from before thee.

Thou shalt be perfect with the LORD thy God.

For these nations, which thou shalt possess, hearkened unto observers of times, and unto diviners: but as for thee, the LORD thy God hath not suffered thee so to do.”

I know many people will put their spin on scripture, picking pieces out to call truth and bend that truth to fit nicely and neatly into their life so they feel justified in doing what they’re doing. I do the same thing. Yes, I’m a sinner and yes I do wrong, but this is going to be the year of change in me as I prepare my soul for my eternity. My previous years have been based on growth. This year I learn from that growth and change. The echo I release to the world will be one of hope and love. I will not be a part of the negativity that so many cling to on a daily basis as their compass in life.

This is not a resolution per se, this is growth and with growth, just like the seedling, comes change. My echo will be heard. 

Have a blessed year growing with God!

Quotation Saturday ~ A New Year is Coming

Quotation Saturday

SPIRIT

“We must become so alone, so utterly alone, that we withdraw into our innermost self. It is a way of bitter suffering. But then our solitude is overcome, we are no longer alone, for we find that our innermost self is the spirit, that it is God, the indivisible. And suddenly we find ourselves in the midst of the world, yet undisturbed by its multiplicity, for our innermost soul we know ourselves to be one with all being.” 
― Hermann Hesse

“Walk with the dreamers, the believers, the courageous, the cheerful, the planners, the doers, the successful people with their heads in the clouds and their feet on the ground. Let their spirit ignite a fire within you to leave this world better than when you found it...” 
― Wilferd Peterson

“As I grow older, much older, I will experience many things, and I will hit rock bottom again and again. Again and again I will suffer; again and again I will get back on my feet. I will not be defeated. I won't let my spirit be destroyed.” 
― Banana Yoshimoto, Kitchen

“There is a LIGHT in this world. A healing spirit more powerful than any darkness we may encounter. We sometime lose sight of this force when there is suffering, and too much pain. Then suddenly, the spirit will emerge through the lives of ordinary people who hear a call and answer in extraordinary ways.” 
― Richard Attenborough

LOVE

“We are not trapped or locked up in these bones. No, no. We are free to change. And love changes us. And if we can love one another, we can break open the sky.” 
― Walter Mosley, Blue Light

“In your light I learn how to love. In your beauty, how to make poems. You dance inside my chest where no-one sees you, but sometimes I do, and that sight becomes this art.” 
― Rumi

“It's not how much we give but how much love we put into giving.” 
― Mother Teresa

“If there's a thing I've learned in my life it's to not be afraid of the responsibility that comes with caring for other people. What we do for love: those things endure. Even if the people you do them for don't” 
― Cassandra Clare

New Year

“Hope
Smiles from the threshold of the year to come, 
Whispering 'it will be happier'...” 
― Alfred Lord Tennyson

“A bridge of silver wings stretches from the dead ashes of an unforgiving nightmare
to the jeweled vision of a life started anew.” 
― Aberjhani, Journey through the Power of the Rainbow: Quotations from a Life Made Out of Poetry

“Let me give you a New Year message: Believe in yourself, because no one ever achieved anything significant without believing in himself and no one ever will! Believe in yourself powerfully, especially when there is no reason left to believe in yourself because the ultimate bottom is the best place to start a big rise!”
― Mehmet Murat ildan

“A year of ending and beginning, a year of loss and finding...and all of you were with me through the storm. I drink your health, your wealth, your fortune for long years to come, and I hope for many more days in which we can gather like this.” 
― C.J. Cherryh, Fortress of Eagles

This year has been long and sorrowful. My prayer for the New Year is that 2016 will be a better year, full of life and love! May the wind sweep across my face and breathe into me a new life, a new aspiration so that all of the world will be consumed in the love and Light I know to exist. God bless you all.
~ Joni