Off for some spiritual healing

Did you hear…


The wind in the trees. Did it pass you by unaware? Did it whisper and you couldn’t make out what it was saying?

This is a writing blog. With over a thousand posts on the writing craft, I have poetry and famous quotations intermingled with my posts. Every now and again I’ll divulge some of my life story, so maybe one person, who might be going through the same thing, might find solace in my words.

Here lately I haven’t felt much like writing, about writing. Why? Because of stats. Statistics show again and again that many come to visit my tell tale life story. I can post a blog on writing and get 50 – 80 hits but let me whisper my life story and wham the stats go up…jumps through the roof.

We’re an odd lot, we humans. Always interested in others shortcomings. Nosey busybodies poking our nose in other people’s business. Is it so we can feel better about ourselves? Do we get a good chuckle and laugh as we say, “Wow that girl has it bad.” And then we run off to tell our other friends, “Did you hear about so and so, did such and such?” Then she tells her friend and so on and so on.

This is what the world has become. And we wonder why we’re in such bad shape? Oh I know, let’s blame it on someone else. I don’t like to talk political jargon, but you know what, I’m sick, extremely sick of people who can’t move on!

The president was nominated, so get over it. He’s here for four more years. Why waste perfect good energy on spewing hate? Do you relish the feeling that hate gives you? Does it feel good swirling around in your mind?

We had a horrific, terrible shooting (a few to my memory) and the president wants to ban assault weapons. Then the cowards sit at home, with no knowledge and spew hate. “He ain’t taking away MY right to bear arms!” So really, you need an assault weapon, for? To display and wave it in your kids face and say, “Look, Daddy’s a man!”

Daddy’s a coward if he needs an assault rifle.

But everyone isn’t really upset about ‘the ban on assault rifles'. They’re upset because ‘it’s MY right!’ Me, me, my my. That’s what the world is all about now.

I understand that the Americans have a right to bear arms, that’s all good, but when should you be given the right to bear an assault rifle? Does a hunter need one to KILL animals? I mean seriously, if he needs more than one shot to kill the doe eyed, innocent victim, an animal, should a hunter be hunting? Make the game fair if you wish to KILL.

I’m sick of all the rhetoric. I’m so tired of all the hate and slaughtering of moral values, I’m fed up with humans in general. As I fought the battle, in the end, it is I who lost.

This is the season where I will try and find myself in the midst of shadows that lurk but are never seen. I will do some spiritual healing and find myself once again.

“In both the Old and New Testaments, fasting is seen as useful for humbling oneself as a sign of commitment or repentance and for increasing faith, especially when accompanied by prayer. Fasting allowed one to be devoted to spiritual matters without distraction from earthly things. However, fasting was not to be considered an end in itself, nor a substitute for obedience to God and doing good deeds.”(Isa. 58:3-10)

As I sit alone in this world with no friends, no family, no one who cares, I will fade to the shadows and one day you’ll see my silhouette standing there, off in the distance. You’ll call out to me but there will be no answer. As you move closer to me I will fade even deeper into the mist, until I am soon forgotten. You’ll move on, forget me, and then remember me.

I hope you wonder to yourself if you had any cause in my despair. Was it you who pushed me to the shadows; Or will you go on with your merry life, consuming yourself with yourself and those that matter to YOU.

In my reflection, I will pray for you all (and for mySELF) and hope to someday return, rejuvenated, revived, reborn.

God Bless you if you are reading this.

Poetry Sunday

Live to Die

Born of this world

we are doomed to try,

Doomed to live

but freed we die.

Life speeds by

no time to slow

The mind is often

not allowed to grow.

Smell the flowers

breathe the air,

Slow the motion

of life with care.

Beauty in sunsets

the rising moon.

Cherish it all

it ends too soon.

* * * *

Our Earthly Duty

My mind spins a column of webs

in this clouded world we live.

Worldly possessions of wants

never outsource what we give.

I feel I’m alone in pursuit

of wanting to see it end.

Wars, fires and poverty

bureaucracy unwilling to bend.

Changing it all for the better

a haunting daunting task.

One by one we succumb

shedding our outer mask.

Now is the time to rise above;

take aim at our earthly duty.

Each man on his own mission

to share the wealth of beauty!

Quotation Saturday

WRITING

“A writer is a person who cares what words mean, what they say, how they say it. Writers know words are their way towards truth and freedom, and so they use them with care, with thought, with fear, with delight. By using words well they strengthen their souls. Story-tellers and poets spend their lives learning that skill and art of using words well. And their words make the souls of their readers stronger, brighter, deeper.”
~ Ursula K. Le Guin

“It's none of their business that you have to learn how to write. Let them think you were born that way.”
~ Ernest Hemingway

“Which of us has not felt that the character we are reading in the printed page is more real than the person standing beside us?”
~ Cornelia Funke

“E.L. Doctorow said once said that 'Writing a novel is like driving a car at night. You can see only as far as your headlights, but you can make the whole trip that way.' You don't have to see where you're going, you don't have to see your destination or everything you will pass along the way. You just have to see two or three feet ahead of you. This is right up there with the best advice on writing, or life, I have ever heard.”
~Anne Lamott, Bird by Bird: Some Instructions on Writing and Life

PAIN

“It's so hard to forget pain, but it's even harder to remember sweetness. We have no scar to show for happiness. We learn so little from peace.”
~ Chuck Palahniuk

“People are afraid of themselves, of their own reality; their feelings most of all. People talk about how great love is, but that’s bull. Love hurts. Feelings are disturbing. People are taught that pain is evil and dangerous. How can they deal with love if they’re afraid to feel? Pain is meant to wake us up. People try to hide their pain. But they’re wrong. Pain is something to carry, like a radio. You feel your strength in the experience of pain. It’s all in how you carry it. That’s what matters. Pain is a feeling. Your feelings are a part of you. Your own reality. If you feel ashamed of them, and hide them, you’re letting society destroy your reality. You should stand up for your right to feel your pain.”
~ Jim Morrison

“You think your pain and your heartbreak are unprecedented in the history of the world, but then you read. It was books that taught me that the things that tormented me most were the very things that connected me with all the people who were alive, or who had ever been alive.”
~ James Baldwin

“Pain insists upon being attended to. God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our consciences, but shouts in our pains. It is his megaphone to rouse a deaf world.”
~ C.S. Lewis

MUSIC

“One good thing about music, when it hits you, you feel no pain.”
~ Bob Marley

“This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.”
~William Shakespeare

“If I were not a physicist, I would probably be a musician. I often think in music. I live my daydreams in music. I see my life in terms of music.”
~ Albert Einstein

“Life, he realize, was much like a song. In the beginning there is mystery, in the end there is confirmation, but it's in the middle where all the emotion resides to make the whole thing worthwhile.”
~ Nicholas Sparks

“Music gives a soul to the universe, wings to the mind, flight to the imagination
and life to everything.”
~ Plato

REFLECTION

“Reflection must be reserved for solitary hours; whenever she was alone, she gave way to it as the greatest relief; and not a day went by without a solitary walk, in which she might indulge in all the delight of unpleasant recollections.”
~ Jane Austen

“Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards.”
~ Søren Kierkegaard

“Reflect upon your present blessings -- of which every man has many -- not on your past misfortunes, of which all men have some.”
~ Charles Dickens

“That’s sad. How plastic and artificial life has become. It gets harder and harder to find something…real.” Nin interlocked his fingers, and stretched out his arms. “Real love, real friends, real body parts…”
~ Jess C. Scott

Poetry Sunday ~ The Ring,The Flame, Sacrifice

The Ring

The ring it wraps around the warmth of my finger.
Endless devotion of my love does linger.
Commitment of truth in faith I am bound.
Nothing obscured; my finger lay crowned.

Deeply enmeshed it's more than a ring.
A sign of his love which makes my heart sing.
A love that surpasses everything immortal.
Entrenched is he in the depths of my portal.

Laying claim to my body, my soul, and my heart,
The ring is a symbol my love won't depart.
A reminder of trust that I'll never stray.
Promises made when he placed it that day.

The ring it marks all we hold true.
Encircles the choice of starting anew.
It's through the ring that I am reminded,
The light of his love shall never be blinded.

Love's Eternal Flame

 Trust is the flame that burns desire,

Of  loves' sweet embers of a fire.

Melting like wax it rolls downstream,

As blissful as moonlights radiant beam.

Honesty is the wick that molds it as one

Until the flame smolders it can't be undone.

Truth is an endless dripless sea,

Of all that bonds you to me.

Faith is the solid sacred pillar

Love is the eternal ignited filler.

Should the candle be left alone and broken,

Silently I'll wander no words to be spoken.

SACRIFICE

Sometimes our lives intermingle with one

Allowing us to expand ourselves.

Committing to the spatial amount of time

Remembering to allow each others wings to spread

Into the fullness of a blossom.

Forever being grateful for the journey

Into each others soul

Constantly nurturing…

Each others total hollow shell.

Copyright ©Joni Zipp All Rights Reserved

Quotation Saturday

VALENTINE’S DAY

 "Loving is not just looking at each other, it's looking in the same direction."
~Antoine de Saint-Expuery,

 "We are all a little weird and life's a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love."
~Unknown

 "Love is a smoke made with the fume of sighs."
~William Shakespeare

“Valentine's Day is just a capitalist scam, designed to make people currently in a relationship spend unnecessary money in a fruitless attempt to ensure undying love and devotion. For those of us not in a relationship, Valentine's Day is simply added pressure to identify ourselves within the context of a romantic relationship, whipping us into a frenzy that only the presence of our soul mates can relieve.”
~ Heather Hepler

LOVE

“True love is rare, and it's the only thing that gives life real meaning.”
~ Nicholas Sparks

“To love is not to hide things, it is to be as open as a fresh wound. You might expose the ugliness in you, but it is the beginning of healing.”
~Joni Zipp

“When we love, we always strive to become better than we are. When we strive to become better than we are, everything around us becomes better too.”
~ Paulo Coelho

“Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses, you build up a whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life...You give them a piece of you. They didn't ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn't your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like 'maybe we should be just friends' turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love.”
~ Neil Gaiman
 
SECRETS

“Your visions will become clear only when you can look into your own heart. Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes.”
~ C.G. Jung

“With a secret like that, at some point the secret itself becomes irrelevant. The fact that you kept it does not.”
~ Sara Gruen

“Lies and secrets, Tessa, they are like a cancer in the soul. They eat away what is good and leave only destruction behind.”
~ Cassandra Clare

“Man is not what he thinks he is, he is what he hides.”
~ André Malraux

“Secrets are lies in disguise,”
~Joni Zipp
 
LIES

“If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.”
~Mark Twain

Above all, don't lie to yourself. The man who lies to himself and listens to his own lie comes to a point that he cannot distinguish the truth within him, or around him, and so loses all respect for himself and for others. And having no respect he ceases to love.”
~Fyodor Dostoevsky

“Anything is better than lies and deceit!”
~ Leo Tolstoy

“When the need to lie surfaces, the need to betray becomes who you are and ever will remain.”
~Joni Zipp

Poetry Sunday ~ Heaven's Hope

Heaven's Hope

My head hangs low this evening

when all the world’s asleep

I give my heart to heaven

so safely it will keep.

I lift my eyes to the sky

where once my soul was free

Heaven bound is my words

I’m left on bended knee.

A sinner stands among you

God has frowned they say.

a little piece of paper

makes me right with God today.

The shadows of the tendrils

as fog has crept on in

Lonely in the mist I sway

stained, I stand in sin.

Confused I’m left to wonder

will the vapor cloud subside.

The hypocrite in me released

No longer do I hide.

God’s own gracious glory

is my only way to cope

Standing firm in my belief

a door of heaven's hope.

Quotation Saturday

SPORTS
(in lieu of Super Bowl Sunday)

“Winning isn't everything--but wanting to win is.”
― Vince Lombardi Jr

“If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead.”
― Erma Bombeck

“I later discovered that in order to be a good athlete one must care intensely what is happening with a ball, even if one doesn't have possession of it. This was ultimately my failure: my inability to work up a passion for the location of balls.”
― Haven Kimmel, Girl Named Zippy: Growing Up Small in Mooreland, Indiana

Vince Lombardi Jr.
“football is like life - it requires perserverance, self-denial, hard work, sacrifice, dedication and respect for authority.”
― Vince Lombardi Jr.

“Guys care about sports teams. I'm not talking about simply rooting; I'm talking about a relationship that guys develop, a commitment to a sport team that guys take way more seriously than, for example, wedding vows.”
― Dave Barry


SUNDAY

“A sabbath well spent,
Brings a week of content,
And strength for the toils of the morrow;
But a sabbath profaned,
Whate’er may be gained,
Is a certain forerunner of sorrow.”
― Anonymous

“... God is not a Sunday plumber - he's always available...”
― John Geddes, A Familiar Rain

“Sunday is the golden clasp that binds together the volume of the week.”
― Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

“... millions long for immortality who don't know what to do with themselves on a rainy Sunday afternoon.”
― Susan Ertz

MEN

“I, with a deeper instinct, choose a man who compels my strength, who makes enormous demands on me, who does not doubt my courage or my toughness, who does not believe me naïve or innocent, who has the courage to treat me like a woman.”
― Anaïs Nin

“Why are women... so much more interesting to men than men are to women?”
― Virginia Woolf

“Well, it seems to me that the best relationships - the ones that last - are frequently the ones that are rooted in friendship. You know, one day you look at the person and you see something more than you did the night before. Like a switch has been flicked somewhere. And the person who was just a friend is... suddenly the only person you can ever imagine yourself with.”
― Gillian Anderson

“No woman wants to be in submission to a man who isn't in submission to God!”
― T.D. Jakes

Poetry Sunday ~ Soul Release

Soul Release

The cavity of the earth is speaking
evil leaking
always seeking
a crevice to call home.
The cabinet of the man it finds
confusing minds
tightly binds
a haven now to roam.

The conscious mind now open wide
deep inside
it tries to hide
scanning for some peace.
Choices to be made within
you begin
release the sin.
The fear and doubt will cease.

Breaking through the solid walls
whispering calls
darkness falls
awakened from the sleeping.
Bringing forth from the dust.
gaining trust
gone is lust
The soul no longer weeping.

Quotation Saturday

GUNS

“Every gun that is made, every warship launched, every rocket fired signifies in the final sense, a theft from those who hunger and are not fed, those who are cold and are not clothed. This world in arms is not spending money alone. It is spending the sweat of its laborers, the genius of its scientists, the hopes of its children. This is not a way of life at all in any true sense. Under the clouds of war, it is humanity hanging on a cross of iron.”
― Dwight D. Eisenhower

“I want to put silencers on all guns. That way war will be nothing more than a whisper in the future. And all those who are caught whispering will be shot.”
― Jarod Kintz

“In every country where independence has taken the place of liberty, the first desire of a manly heart is to possess a weapon which at once renders him capable of defence or attack, and, by rendering its owner fearsome, makes him feared.”
― Alexandre Dumas

I used to think it was possible for an artist to alter the inner life of the culture. Now bomb-makers and gunmen have taken that territory.”
― Don DeLillo, Mao II

I keep hearing this [expletive] thing that guns don't kill people, but people kill people. If that's the case, why do we give people guns when they go to war? Why not just send the people?”
― Ozzy Osbourne

VIOLENCE

An eye for an eye will only make the whole world blind.”
― Mahatma Gandhi

I object to violence because when it appears to do good, the good is only temporary; the evil it does is permanent.”
― Mahatma Gandhi

“We often think of peace as the absence of war, that if powerful countries would reduce their weapon arsenals, we could have peace. But if we look deeply into the weapons, we see our own minds- our own prejudices, fears and ignorance. Even if we transport all the bombs to the moon, the roots of war and the roots of bombs are still there, in our hearts and minds, and sooner or later we will make new bombs. To work for peace is to uproot war from ourselves and from the hearts of men and women. To prepare for war, to give millions of men and women the opportunity to practice killing day and night in their hearts, is to plant millions of seeds of violence, anger, frustration, and fear that will be passed on for generations to come. ”
― Thich Nhat Hanh, Living Buddha, Living Christ

“See, people with power understand exactly one thing: violence.”
― Noam Chomsky

PEACE

“Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that.”
― Martin Luther King Jr.

Dogs are our link to paradise. They don't know evil or jealousy or discontent. To sit with a dog on a hillside on a glorious afternoon is to be back in Eden, where doing nothing was not boring--it was peace.”
― Milan Kundera

The day the power of love overrules the love of power, the world will know peace.”
― Mahatma Gandhi

“Until he extends the circle of his compassion to all living things, man will not himself find peace.”
― Albert Schweitzer

No Doubt

"Squelch the doubt with a challenge, you'll be surprised how high you climb." ~Joni

I sometimes come off as harsh, and if yesterdays post offended anyone, please accept my apologies. Anyone that knows me, knows I’m honest, to a fault. I tell it like it is and I tell the truth. It may not be YOUR truth but it is all I know to be TRUTH. And yes, the truth hurts some of the time.


A lot of times as I’m writing I have no specific person in mind, but often I’m told, “That spoke to ME!” I’m glad that in my writing, you can see yourself there. Honestly, this is more about me, finding my place, but if it speaks to you, well then, all the better.

We as writers live in self-doubt. We always doubt our work, our sincerity, our façade. What? You don’t have a façade? Come on now, be honest with yourself and you’ll feel better. A façade is like a mask. You wake in the morning, slide your foot into your slippers and shuffle off to make coffee, making plans in your head of what needs to be done for the day.

You put your face on as you listen to the computer hum to life. “I’m feeling good about this today.” You say to yourself, “I’m going to write.” Then it happens, the façade slips over your face, you head somewhere you have no intention of writing and spend your day, wallowing in self-absorption for hours on end and then wonder, “Hey, where did the time go?”

No writing was accomplished and that was truly your intention when you slid in the chair in the morning, but by now it is afternoon, and you have so much more of life to take care of, like washing clothes, cleaning, the mundane chores. Then when it is time to slide into bed, there it hits you, the self- doubt. “This just isn’t for me” you say, “I’m no good.” Blah blah blah.

To get over this hurdle of self- doubt, you need to prioritize your time! Sometimes we have every intention of coming in and writing but we’re sidetracked, not because we found something more interesting but because we’re really trying to subdue our intent. We intend to write, but we’re not forced to do it, so we don’t.

Make writing a priority. To do this, open word document instead of the Internet. I, a lot of the time, get lost in my email and reading today’s Top Stories, then I need to share what I’ve read and then it’s gone, the precious moments of the morning in which I choose to write.

Note to self:

1. Prioritize – If you are really serious about being a writer, you must make it a precedent and force yourself to ignore emails, facebook, Top News.

2. Mantra – Adopt a mantra that you’ll repeat over and over again. “I’m going to write!” or “I can do it, I know I can.”

3. Set goals – This is important too as you don’t want to start off like the Hare in the Turtle and the Hare race. We all know what happens there don’t we? “I’ll start off with 500 words a day, and raise it when I’m comfortable.”

4. DON’T GET DISCOURAGED – This is easier said than done. Sometimes we see we’re not getting anywhere, so we give up. If you hit this block in the road, it is important to find an avenue you’re comfortable with. Find a site that offers prompts, copy many of them down, and get off the internet to WRITE!

5. Turn off the voices – You know we all have them, that’s where self-doubt rings in our ears. If they become too insistent, play music. It sometimes distracts you from the voices, puts you in a zone to write.

6. Determination – Be determined in your writing. Determined to accomplish a great feat. Determined to alter the negative voices into positive inspiration that will feed you on your journey.

Now get writing. Stare at the blank page as if it were a conquerable mountain that you dare to climb. Dare yourself to go there and write as if it is a challenge that you’re going to tackle head on. Our voices don’t like challenges, because that is where self-doubt is born.

I can’t encourage you every single day to write your heart out. I can’t hold your hand and walk you through this but I can offer you a positive, uplifting voice, that you’ll never hear, only read. It is now up to you to go forward with NO DOUBT.

Self Doubt

“Just by going to Church doesn’t make you a Christian any more than standing in the garage makes you a car.”

Joyce Meyer and others

*** 

Like the contagious flu going around, I hear self -doubt is going around too. It can be quite contagious if you don’t have a mask of protection on. Some people don’t feel they need a mask, but it is helpful in a germ-ridden world of self-doubt and non-believers.

I have lived with self- doubt most of my life. It’s a form of low self-esteem, which carried me for twenty years of a bad marriage. I was always closed off from the world, didn’t write (no computer) but you know what? That didn’t stop me from writing and healing myself.

I began meditating as a way to center my thoughts. Don’t get me wrong here, it does not go against my religious convictions, instead it walks WITH my religious faith.

Pss. 1: 2 But his delight is in the law of the LORD; and in his law doth he meditate day and night.

I can find may references to meditation so it isn’t some new age ritual. It’s been around for some time. I use meditation to get me focused on God and more important things like, ME! It is okay to focus on you, because that is where you’ll find the most healing transition in your life.

I grew up in a family of self-doubters and huggers of low self-esteem. We were not rooted in God, we were rooted in alcohol and abuse. It is all I knew. It was up to ME to change, ME, with a little (no, a lot) of help from God.

I waited on the Lord and twenty years later, drastic change came my way. What? Twenty years? Yes, I waited twenty years. God doesn’t give us a set date and time, so when I hear people say they waited a year and got nothing, I say, “A year? Really?”

I realize people don’t have twenty years to wait and your time may be less than mine. I was deep, deep in depression, the FEAR of failure and nonacceptance, that I ignored opportunities to grow. Being surrounded with the negative people didn’t help matters any. It wasn’t until I had a God-slap moment, that things took on a life of its own.

I stopped looking everywhere else for my healing, looked within and saw myself cradled in an all powerful love hug from God himself. I no longer looked outward, in say horoscopes, the extra terrestrial life that I suspected was out there, I had to look within and stayed focused on one thing, God. Yes it takes persistent practice, nail-biting downfalls, uplifting moments and guess what, PATIENCE!

I had read once (okay many times) that satan is an all too consuming power that will have you looking outward at these false things, so that you can’t focus on God. Made sense to me.

Maybe it was from the false belief, that God helps those, who help themselves. I’m sorry to disagree, but God helps the HELPLESS, the HOPELESS. God helps us all! Sure he’ll be your guide as you struggle to help yourself, but really, when you’re in a darkened pit, you do all you CAN to help yourself, and you just want to be freed from the pit, like Daniel in the Lion’s Den.

Ten years ago, God took me out of the pit and assured me He would be along on the journey. I left my home in Baltimore, ventured into the grand state of Texas, and never looked back at the life I left behind. I made it out of the pit of dysfunction and negativity, crawled on my hands and knees in a merciful fashion and was met with adversity and struggles, but now I realized, it was ME, not some strapped up prisoner afraid of everything.

My life changed. I got my license for the first time, was encouraged to do things on my own, like shopping for food! (I told you I was a prisoner) and slowly but surely layers of low self-esteem peeled away from me, like a banana yielding a delicious fruit! I was now a precious fruit in my own mind. Finally I shed self-doubt, and left it lying on the ground for someone to slip and fall on, because I wasn’t going back!

Sure I have doubts sometimes, but know, the more focused I am on God and my purpose, not facebook, twitter, Myspace or Pinterest, the more and more layers of doubt peel away. The more I don’t focus on what can be done today, like cleaning (all idle or idol distractions) or television, I woman up and do rightful things in the MOMENT, like WRITE!

Prayerful meditation will guide you gently in the here and now. Not in the failures or let downs, in the HERE and NOW! Once focused on the moment, you’ll see, you've accomplished something and wonder, “How’d I do that?”

To add to the opening quote: “Just because you believe in Christ, doesn’t make you a Christian, no more than believing in a horrorscope makes it the truth of your day.”  Joni Zipp

Poetry Sunday ~ A Wrinkle in Time

A Wrinkle in Time

***

Within my words lie hidden

the scars of a woman worn.

Hands are wrinkled with the time

aged body is pierced by a thorn.

Spying those who target

one cause after another

The mark of hatred spewing

no humble love for brother.

A single star all on her own

in an island of false light.

Shining among the lowliest

yet hidden from plain sight.

Not ever mingling with the dark;

a diamond lights up the sky.

Sparkling, twinkling in the night

no man has asked her why.

Reflections in the galaxy pool

so few are here like me.

The scars of a woman worn

a wrinkle in time set free.

Quotation Saturday

JOURNEY

“The only journey is the one within.”
~ Rainer Maria Rilke

“Not I, nor anyone else can travel that road for you.
You must travel it by yourself.
It is not far. It is within reach.
Perhaps you have been on it since you were born, and did not know.
Perhaps it is everywhere - on water and land.”
~ Walt Whitman, Leaves of Grass

“Not all those who wander are lost.”
~ J.R.R. Tolkien

“It's funny how, in this journey of life, even though we may begin at different times and places, our paths cross with others so that we may share our love, compassion, observations, and hope. This is a design of God that I appreciate and cherish.”
~ Steve Maraboli, Life, the Truth, and Being Free  
HEALING

“It has been said, 'time heals all wounds.' I do not agree. The wounds remain. In time, the mind, protecting its sanity, covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessens. But it is never gone.”
~ Rose Kennedy

“Pain is a pesky part of being human, I've learned it feels like a stab wound to the heart, something I wish we could all do without, in our lives here. Pain is a sudden hurt that can't be escaped. But then I have also learned that because of pain, I can feel the beauty, tenderness, and freedom of healing. Pain feels like a fast stab wound to the heart. But then healing feels like the wind against your face when you are spreading your wings and flying through the air! We may not have wings growing out of our backs, but healing is the closest thing that will give us that wind against our faces.”
~ C. JoyBell C.

Novalis
“Poetry heals the wounds inflicted by reason.”
~ Novalis

“As my sufferings mounted I soon realized that there were two ways in which I could respond to my situation -- either to react with bitterness or seek to transform the suffering into a creative force. I decided to follow the latter course.”
~ Martin Luther King Jr. 
TRANSFORMATION

“Meditation is an essential travel partner on your journey of personal transformation. Meditation connects you with your soul,and this connection gives you access to your intuition, your heartfelt desires, your integrity, and the inspiration to create a life you love.”
~ Sarah McLean

“Sorrow prepares you for joy. It violently sweeps everything out of your house, so that new joy can find space to enter. It shakes the yellow leaves from the bough of your heart, so that fresh, green leaves can grow in their place. It pulls up the rotten roots, so that new roots hidden beneath have room to grow. Whatever sorrow shakes from your heart, far better things will take their place.”
~ Rumi

“Scared and sacred are spelled with the same letters. Awful proceeds from the same root word as awesome. Terrify and terrific. Every negative experience holds the seed of transformation.”
~ Alan Cohen

“When you fight yourself to discover the real you, there is only one winner.”
~ Stephen Richards

A Writer? You?

A sticky thorny subject...

So many of you say you’re a writer. What do you do about it? Well you can’t just say the words, spill a few onto an empty page and then call yourself a writer. To be a writer is to take action to be a writer.


1. You must study – This is good either in a college or at an online course where you can surround yourself with like-minded people who share your interests in becoming a writer.

2. Become a writer – To become a writer you must write. You must love conjuring tales in your head then write them down. Write a poem or two and get a feel for the ACT of writing. One thing writers don’t do, is NOT write.

3. Know grammar – I see a lot of writers write excellent stories but have no clue on grammar and punctuation. You need to understand the English language very well if that is going to be the language of your target audience.

4. Pick a genre – You can’t just write a story and have no clear idea of what it is you’re writing. Sometimes picking a genre can segue you right into a story idea. You need to know what and whom you are writing for.

5. Do your homework – Know what is out there waiting for you as in submissions, markets, publishers, agents etc.

This is a short list but a tight list to get you started on your journey. I’ve seen many a writer get started on this journey only to be hindered or discouraged along the way for whatever reason: life, circumstance, negative people, time etc. etc.

1. You must make time every day to write even if it’s a short story, a poem or a chapter in your novel. Me, I blog to keep my muse active, sometimes I write but don’t blog it (too personal) but I still write as much as I can.

2. Put it out there – A lot of times this is where we get the recognition we’re seeking in our writing.

3. Connect – Shut out facebook and Twitter for the day, and only focus on connecting with writers in your group, library group, or whatever group you choose. Stay connected to writers!

4. Write – This one is tough if you don’t feel like writing. Find a prompt generator that randomly selects ideas for you; run with it and write!

5. Be yourself – Trying to be more than you are will slowly put you behind. Be yourself in your writing and it will all come together for you.

These are just some minor tips for the beginner. To one who is already an author? You should know all these facts with your eyes closed. These tips are helpful to the wanna-be writer also, it might be the kick in the rear that you’ve been seeking.

So what are you waiting for? Get out there and write!

Poetry Sunday ~ I Am Not Alone

 Is. 60: 19 The sun shall be no more thy light by day; neither for brightness shall the moon give light unto thee: but the LORD shall be unto thee an everlasting light, and thy God thy glory.

I Am Not Alone
***
As I sit in the midst of life
I ponder comings and goings.
Mixed and mingled are no friends
for surely they have no showings.

My life is spent in solitude
my days are filled from within.
I long to have a friend in life
but where am I to begin?

Lonely days wash over me
like a warm soft summers rain
I’m forever alone in my thoughts
often driven insane.

I stumble and I sometimes fall,
I trip sometimes as they all laugh.
No one knows the pain I endure,
the misery for time and a half.

Look at me as I stand so strong,
all that I have overcome
See the light shine forth from me
as my work is not yet done.

With the Lord as my shepherd
on this path I’m never alone
Friends may come and they may go
but never forget the light I’ve shone.

Pss. 27: 1 The LORD is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? the LORD is the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?

Quotation Saturday

OPTIMISM

“A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.”
~ Winston S. Churchill

“For myself I am an optimist - it does not seem to be much use to be anything else.”
~ Winston S. Churchill

“Write it on your heart that every day is the best day in the year.”
~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

Howard Zinn
“TO BE HOPEFUL in bad times is not just foolishly romantic. It is based on the fact that human history is a history not only of cruelty, but also of compassion, sacrifice, courage, kindness.
What we choose to emphasize in this complex history will determine our lives. If we see only the worst, it destroys our capacity to do something. If we remember those times and places—and there are so many—where people have behaved magnificently, this gives us the energy to act, and at least the possibility of sending this spinning top of a world in a different direction.
And if we do act, in however small a way, we don’t have to wait for some grand utopian future. The future is an infinite succession of presents, and to live now as we think human beings should live, in defiance of all that is bad around us, is itself a marvelous victory.”
~ Howard Zinn
 

HOPE

“Even the darkest night will end and the sun will rise.”
~ Victor Hugo, Les Misérables

“The world is indeed full of peril and in it there are many dark places.
But still there is much that is fair. And though in all lands, love is now
mingled with grief, it still grows, perhaps, the greater.”
~ J.R.R. Tolkien, The Lord of the Rings

Anne Frank
“I don't think of all the misery, but of the beauty that still remains.”
~ Anne Frank, The Diary of a Young Girl

“to love life, to love it even
when you have no stomach for it
and everything you've held dear
crumbles like burnt paper in your hands,
your throat filled with the silt of it.
When grief sits with you, its tropical heat
thickening the air, heavy as water
more fit for gills than lungs;
when grief weights you like your own flesh
only more of it, an obesity of grief,
you think, How can a body withstand this?
Then you hold life like a face
between your palms, a plain face,
no charming smile, no violet eyes,
and you say, yes, I will take you
I will love you, again.”
~ Ellen Bass 

INTENTIONS

“A gift consists not in what is done or given, but in the intention of the giver or doer.”
~ Lucius Annaeus Seneca

“How would your life be different if…You pretended those around you were deaf to your words? Let today be the day…You let your actions speak and communicate your feelings and intentions.”
~ Steve Maraboli

“The wise do not buy into other people’s perceptions of who they are and what they are capable of. Instead, they bypass a person’s public persona and see who they are in their highest expression. When you see actions taken with integrity instead of words only, you will then know a soul’s worth.”
~ Shannon L. Alder

“The word God can mean whatever you believe it to mean, for me it is the conscious stream of life from which we all come, and to which we can stay connected throughout our lives as a source of peace, wisdom, love, support, knowing, inspiration, vitality, security, balance, and inner strength.
I think that awareness is paramount, because in awareness we gain understanding, which then enables us to regain our feeling of empowerment.
We need to feel empowered to make our choices consciously, about how to deal with changes in life, rather than reacting in fear (which tends to make us blind and weak).
If we are aware, we can be realistic yet positive, and we can properly focus our intentions.
Awareness can be quite sensual (which can add to your sense of feeling empowered). Think about how your body moves as you live your life, how amazing it is; think about nature, observe the intricate beautiful details of natural things, and of things we create, and breathe deeply to soak it all in.. Focus on the taste of food, the feel of textures in cloth, the feel of you partner's hand in yours; smell the sea breeze, listen to the wind in the trees, witness the colours of the leaves, the children playing; and be thankful for this life we are experiencing - this life we can all help to keep wonderful. Feel the wonder of being alive flood into you anytime you want, by taking a deep breath and letting the experience of these things fill you, even just by remembering.
We all have that same stream of life within us, so you are a part of everything. Each one of us has the power to make a difference to everything.
Breathe in that vital connection to the life source and sensual beauty everywhere. Feel loved and strong.”
~ Jay Woodman


“Know that God is the source of your breath and and your best intentions will shine forth and give hope to the world.”
~ Joni Zipp

Poetry Sunday ~ Bough Breaks

Ezek. 15:2 Son of man, What is the vine tree more than any tree, or than a branch which is among the trees of the forest?

Bough Breaks
*  *  *
Snowdrifts pile on the tree,
a morning of beauty for eye to see.
Branches bow in prayer to Him
whiteness clings to every limb.

Boughs moan with the slightest breeze,
broken down in the slightest sneeze.
A whispering wind the twig it grieves,
breaking the sprig that has no leaves.

Lonely and cold the cows they roam
in the open field they call home.
No shelter from the bended wings,
I hear them calling, the morning sings.

The broken branch I see it bleed,
giving earth its one last seed.
Hear me Lord, my earthly cries,
fill my heart with joyous skies.

For all that’s broken, now must mend.
my heart, my soul made to bend.
For only you gives all that’s real,
The earth and I will slowly heal.

Quotation Saturday

WRITING

“Let me live, love and say it well in good sentences.”
~ Sylvia Plath, The Bell Jar

“I write to give myself strength. I write to be the characters that I am not. I write to explore all the things I'm afraid of. ”
~ Joss Whedon

 “If you want to really hurt you parents, and you don't have the nerve to be gay, the least you can do is go into the arts. I'm not kidding. The arts are not a way to make a living. They are a very human way of making life more bearable. Practicing an art, no matter how well or badly, is a way to make your soul grow, for heaven's sake. Sing in the shower. Dance to the radio. Tell stories. Write a poem to a friend, even a lousy poem. Do it as well as you possible can. You will get an enormous reward. You will have created something.”
~ Kurt Vonnegut

“If you do not breathe through writing, if you do not cry out in writing, or sing in writing, then don't write, because our culture has no use for it.”
~ Anaïs Nin

“The reason that fiction is more interesting than any other form of literature, to those who really like to study people, is that in fiction the author can really tell the truth without humiliating himself.”
~ Eleanor Roosevelt

BOOKS

“You have to write the book that wants to be written. And if the book will be too difficult for grown-ups, then you write it for children.”
~ Madeleine L'Engle

“There is no friend as loyal as a book.”
~ Ernest Hemingway

“In a good bookroom you feel in some mysterious way that you are absorbing the wisdom contained in all the books through your skin, without even opening them.”
~ Mark Twain

“There are two motives for reading a book; one, that you enjoy it; the other, that you can boast about it.”
~ Bertrand Russell

ART

“A painter should begin every canvas with a wash of black, because all things in nature are dark except where exposed by the light.”
~ Leonardo da Vinci

“You must have chaos within you to give birth to a dancing star.”
~ Friedrich Nietzsche

“I am an excitable person who only understands life lyrically, musically, in whom feelings are much stronger as reason. I am so thirsty for the marvelous that only the marvelous has power over me. Anything I can not transform into something marvelous, I let go. Reality doesn't impress me. I only believe in intoxication, in ecstasy, and when ordinary life shackles me, I escape, one way or another. No more walls.”
~ Anaïs Nin

“It is good to love many things, for therein lies the true strength, and whosoever loves much performs much, and can accomplish much, and what is done in love is well done.”
~ Vincent van Gogh

“Art washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life.”
~ Pablo Picasso

“Writer’s are artists with a pen, coloring your world with words.”
~Joni Zipp

My Year in Review

Matt. 6:8 Be not ye therefore like unto them: for your Father knoweth what things ye have need of, before ye ask him.

***

 January – It began, knowing full well I had to find a dentist, I had the money to cover the FULL bill, and was helped immensely by friends, with love and monetarily, in getting vitamins and herbs to aid with my deteriorating body. Thank you friends!

Steven, after being blind for three years, had his one eye restored in October, via a cornea transplant, and my body was not acting right by November. It was as if God was saying to me, “Now it’s your turn.” I’m okay with that.

February – The dentist appointment arrived, but it was only to go over the much- needed work I needed to have done. I think this is when an eye infection hit Steven, and many trips to Omaha were adding more pressure on my back pain rendering me practically unable to walk.

March and April – whizzed by in a flash. Trips to Omaha (they’re 6 hour drives at the least.) Trips to the dentist and Easter were fast approaching. I had a birthday squeezed in there somewhere. It’s a little foggy. (must be old age creeping in)

May- June – Found us in the garden growing pumpkins and tending flowers that were starting to grow. I found myself with many back issues haunting me and more dental visits were creeping along, slowly stealing my sanity. May was also the year my niece graduated so once again, another family function to attend.

Keep in mind, I love his family very much, miss my family, which I haven’t seen in six years, and surely was not feeling like a social butterfly. I wanted to crawl in my shell and just be left alone there. It was not to be. I embraced each function, continued going to Church, and my days were like ships out at sea, sometimes calm, cool and relaxing, while others were raging storms.

July – A very strange month for me. This is the month I felt a darkness crawling into the house like a thick fog. It hovered over the house mid-month so I sought the only refuge I knew, my church family. The one minister we visited with took things I said and turned it into a ‘me’ issue. Not realizing that evil is a sorely shunned issue. It hung like a wet blanket over my days, trying to smother me and I turned to what I know best, prayer and meditation. The Light is a much better trustworthy companion when fighting the dark. Yes I’m weird and strange, but I know there is only one way to fight a darkly lit room, and that is by turning on the LIGHT!

August – Another very hot month and having not a drop of rain was depressing. Farmers were hurting, flowers were struggling, pumpkins were growing, and Steven was getting antsy behind the keyboard and wanting to renew his license. He had gotten glasses, and was now ready to take the next step, getting his license restored; taken away when he went blind, his sight now restored meant a license to drive once again.

He took the test and failed the first time, the second time, but the third time, he passed. With a forty-mile driving range restriction, he was now a functional man once again.

My back pain was still there like a throbbing sore thumb, but I plowed ahead in Joni fashion and took each day as it came.

September – Ah September, the month I found my writing again, forged ahead, forgiving old hurts, and reconnecting with old friends I thought were gone out of my life. Restrictions were placed on the class I took, but I didn’t let it shape my renewal of writing. I was not going to allow the same people, who attacked me a year earlier, to dry up my love of writing once again and the six-week course went forward, I accomplished my goal and was writing once again.

During this time, Steven was job-hunting effortlessly. He would take anything that got him out of the house and made to feel like a part of society once again.

WalMart accepted him and he was happily in the work force once again!

October- November – With sore legs and back Steven worked his 30-hour workweek and the hours in the chill were settling into him. He was/is happy. A shopoholics dream; a job at WalMart! lol

Me, my pain soared me through these last months of the year. I was happy if he was happy and that is all that matters.

Not being a lover of family, WalMart insist its workers work on National Holidays. My Thanksgiving was spent at home, with Adam and I embracing the day and making it a day of Christmas decorating to surprise Steven after a long hard day at work.

Sure everyone told me of their many off day Thanksgiving celebrations, and working on T-day, but this was MY very first T-day without a Turkey day celebration.

December – Well this month was not without its turmoil. In Joni-fashion, it was full of drama. The month of November ended with an eye infection for Steven, but this time it was his bad eye. We really didn’t think anything could happen in that eye but Dec. proved to be a trying and challenging month for us both. The infection was too severe for treatment and we were told the eye had to be removed. A lot of confusion with all of that, I can tell you that much. But four trips to Omaha in two weeks, one week of missed work (thank you WalMart for understanding), and a lot of emotions were running wild. My back responded with rendering me unable to really lift my right leg, leaving me crippled and rendered me almost incapable of shuffling across the floor, dragging my leg behind. All my shopping had to be done online and I missed the stores for the holidays (and who says there isn’t a God?) lol I’m the opposite of Steven in that matter, I hate shopping, hate, hate, hate it!

Steven was back to work after his operation and week off, and the holiday was spent at his brother’s house. Steven had to work Christmas eve, and 8 in the morning the day after Christmas, but he did it.

Me, I’m still wobbly and fighting tooth and nail to be able to walk normal again.

Allow me to have a bragging moment. Adam has been GREAT through all of this. I don’t know about you, but how many boys do you know that would do the vacuuming, and dishes and dusting and stuff, when they knew their mother couldn’t? Mine did, and more! Shoveling snow, putting groceries away, taking care of things I couldn’t! I can honestly say, I’m a pretty proud mom.

You might read this and think, “Wow, that wasn’t a good year.” Or you might say, “Mine was worse than THAT!” But can you say, “I’ve had a year of blessings layered throughout my bad year?” Well I can. Sure I could see this as not a ‘good’ year per se, but know, there have been too many God given blessings for me to say it was a bad year.

In a year where I needed more money than I had, all was provided for. No matter what my need for any given month, God saw to it that my needs were met. He may have used YOU, or YOU, or any number of people to fulfill the needs in my life, but know, my year was a blessing filled year, and not one day has gone by that I haven’t noticed God’s presence in my life.

While all around me people’s lives were torn apart, storms took lives, weather took your crops, insane men were driven mad and took lives; my life has been full and richly rewarded. I’m a living testament to Christ, and without Him in my life and my focus on Him and not me me me, left me spiritually full, richly blessed, and another great year to be alive.

Whomever it is you believe in, just know, YOU are blessed to be alive in these times.

God bless you all!