The Moral of the Story Is...

Easter April 1st, 2018 - Snow - Lots of it

Isa. 55:9 "For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts."

The Moral of the Story... 

All week I was undecided whether I was going to make it to the family’s Easter gathering. Since I haven’t been able to walk really well for a month now I cried out and said if I can’t walk I’m not going. It isn’t as if his family hasn’t seen me in this weakened state. Remember I’ve spoken many of time how their eyes speak of pity, dripping of poor Joni looks. It hurts me to see that look on their faces. It’s not my fault I can read people, but their eyes being the window of their soul, their pity pours from their eyes.

All month I’ve struggled to get better. His mom came out last week for my birthday and brought me an enormous fruit tray! She asked if we’d be coming on Easter and defensively I said, “I don’t even know how I’ll feel tomorrow nevertheless in a week.” I left it at that because each new day is a challenge and I feel different every day.

This week I almost forced myself to feel better. One day I would walk well and I kept myself busy and the next day the cane was back in my hand. Each day that I feel better I find myself trying to do too much in a day and am in pain the very next day. It’s the new game of what will I feel today. Friday I washed clothes, scrubbed up the tub and bathroom, vacuumed the floor as if I was preparing for guests to arrive! Saturday I woke and didn’t feel bad at all and went on with my chore for the day and that was going to be to make my mother’s classic macaroni salad to take with me on our Easter outing. With determination in hand, I was intent on going to a family get-together.

All week long the weather was predicting a cold spell for Easter Sunday. Cold as in twenty to thirty degrees after a mixture of the fifties and sixties on the clickity-clanking roller coaster ride of the transitional winter-spring event. I don’t know what day it was when I checked the weather and the word snow popped up but I paid it no mind and went on to healing, physically and emotionally.

Friday came and I checked the weather and it said more than just snow, it said Winter Weather Advisory! For some reason, I thought it was a nasty unethical April Fools joke but I knew deep down the professionals in the field wouldn’t do something of that magnitude. They were now calling for three to five inches of snow, eight if you were under the heavy band that was attached to the storm.

I trudged ahead with my plans; it took my whole day Saturday to make the macaroni salad with every intention of going to see the family on Easter Sunday. A whole day to make macaroni salad you ask? Well, when it comes to steaming the shrimp, cutting up the stuff that goes in it, hard-boiling eggs and mixing the sauce, yes, it takes about four to five hours to make it perfect, the classic way I remember it being made from childhood.

Everything seemed to be going wrong! I made this dish for years now but this time everything was going wonky on me from the noodles to the eggs, step by step it just kept getting worse and worse! The two-pounds of macaroni noodles were not the right ones. I usually use just the simple generic elbows but these were name brand and apparently, two pounds of simple elbow macaroni to generic brands is different than the name brands. I had enough fancier ridged noodles than I knew what to do with! 

From what felt like overcooked noodles to the undercooked eggs, and my dog circling my feet wondering if anything would drop for her, to my back in wrenching pain, this wasn’t going well. I persisted and went on winding up with making a meal for the guys with the excess noodles I had, making me something to eat and having more than enough macaroni salad for all. The optimist in me reigns!

For the entire week of Holy Week, I stayed focused on my faith and winding down the Lenten season with all that I’ve learned. My mornings and writings, as usual, were scripture, my movies at night were God related; winding down at a nice pace, pain in check but persistence won out very easily.

I didn’t even think of the snow until Sunday morning came. I woke and as I peeked out the window I could see a blanket of cotton covering the darkness. As the sun, or lack thereof, began shedding light on the horizon, I could see what I couldn’t see an hour ago, a little more snow than I thought. My son was due to drive home in the wintry white slippery stuff, yet again, after his two nights a week graveyard shift ended. He came home sore because of the shoveling he had to do and the lugging of salt. 

As the blustery temps remained below freezing, the snow kept falling and falling rendering us homebound for the day. I wasn’t willing to drive in the stuff since my back cannot handle the swerves a slick icy/muddy road causes and my husband, being blind in one eye, has trouble differentiating the ditch and the road when it is all uniformly white. We played it safe and stayed home. His mom was disappointed but she wanted us all safe too. Other family members couldn’t make it either, so I didn’t feel too bad about not being able to attend. Maybe she should set the time later than twelve noon from now on. Nope, tradition is tradition and one thing I’ve learned from this family is that they are steeped in routine and tradition.

I didn’t plan on being home for the day so now I had to figure out a meal. Plans are made to be broken I get, but I was certainly not ready for it to be seven inches of snow on April first to be what kept us home. Yes, we could’ve trudged through the snow, after all that is another thing I learned about Nebraskan’s, they don’t let snow stop them from anything. I live in a 4x4 red, white, and black state, Husker nation through and through.

By two o’clock the sun had pierced through the heavy blanket of clouds and the snow had finally stopped. I had shoveled a path for my dog earlier and the path was all but gone, filled in with snow, except for a sliver of brown peeking through. The roads looked very passable and finally cars were passing on the now slushy mess. The warming of the ground from many fifty and sixty degree days helped alleviate the plowing of the snow. The eight inches of snow I brushed from the truck was now sliding off the roof that I couldn’t reach, but the grass was still thick in the middle of the white stuff that defined the majority of the ‘Winter from Hell’! Temperatures stayed in the twenties the entire day of April 1st, 2018.

Then the words came through the tunnel…I have to go to the emergency room. * thud * I nearly fainted at the sight of blood and was rendered useless. Wrapped in gauze my husband drove off as I nurtured my near-fainting, dizzying spell and vomiting. Four stitches later and two hours passed (I was still woozy) my husband made it back home. Unless you want me to pass out, please don’t ask me what happened in my hubby’s new ‘workshop’. Use your imagination, DO NOT ASK! 

All in all the ending of the Lenten season’s highlight was the moral of the entire season; our plans are not God’s plans! Our ways are not His ways! He can and WILL do whatever He sets in motion to do! No one else is in control but Him! Let loose of the ego in you and be reminded, God is good all the time, ALL THE TIME GOD IS GOOD! 

Pss. 118: 5  “I called upon the LORD in distress: the LORD answered me, and set me in a large place.

[6] The LORD is on my side; I will not fear: what can man do unto me?”

[8] It is better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in man.

4 1 18 - Chrismas Pointsettias covered in snow! 

We couldn't have Easter without Christmas now, can we? 

The Road Less Traveled

 2 Cor. 10:17 “But he that glorieth, let him glory in the Lord.” 

The Road Less Traveled

Out here where I live, the roads less traveled are marked as ‘road not serviced’ meaning the dirt road is not graded and will be bumpy and uneven in places. We sometimes go down these roads just out of curiosity and intrigued by what lies ahead.

I’ve noticed in these very trying times, many people are more than likely to stick to the here and now familiarity. To me, it seems God is not allotting time for the familiar and is throwing us all on the road less traveled. I see over and over again people thinking that they control their circumstances and don’t really rely on God. It’s as if He is the ‘go to’ guy and not the depended upon King of Kings that He is!

When I was diagnosed with this ‘dire disease’ that everyone has their own ideas about, but me, being different as I am, I chose the road less traveled. On this bumpy and at times uncertain road I’m met with the ungraded surface of people that don’t understand and are not willing to even learn. Is society so set it in its ways that there is no room for growth?

I’m alive in a time of miracles and people move in a robotic routine state on the conveyor belt of life. As winds and storms take aim, as civility has ceased to exist, as doctors are no longer the healers of their profession but basically drug dealers with a license, the world is in utter chaos.

I’m alive and grateful for every living day. As I continue on down this road less traveled, I don’t have to see the hurried people on the highway of life. I don’t have to be a witness to the ‘me first’ society on the roundabouts that hurry people along. I don’t have to be a part of the political correctness of the world. I bow to no one but my Lord and Savior.

While blessings abound in my neck of the woods, I do get to witness God and all His glory. While some might not see a simple change in the schedule as a blessing, I don’t and never have believed in mere coincidences. We’ve had high winds for close to forty-eight hours now. I’m not talking about 10-20 mph winds, I’m talking 30-35mph sustained winds which means constant and unending, with GUSTS hitting the fifty and sixty mph range. Two whole days of unending wind, which doesn’t make travel easy, now does it? 

It doesn’t show up in news reports of our wind because I’m out in the middle of nowhere in a state that basically is invisible in a country overrun by big cities facing their own impending storms and damage. A blessing (to me) was when a girl at my husbands' job wanted to ‘switch’ days off with him. I knew today would be another day of hard to drive into work on our measly two-lane roads. Let a wind gust push you into the oncoming lane’s traffic, which happened Sunday as we went food shopping. Hubby said that yesterday the wind pushed him all over the road going to work, so I was not looking forward to both my guys having to drive in this stuff. Yes, God will protect them no matter what.

Today both hubby and son are off of work! Coincidence? I think not. A gentleman at my son’s work asked (last night) if he could switch days off and my son was more than happy to oblige. To me, that is two blessings! God is keeping a careful eye on my stress levels and keeping my family safe. After trying to venture outdoors yesterday and nearly getting pushed down the stairs by the gusting winds, I barely made it back up the steps to come in the house and the entire incident left me kind of shaken. I think I’ve lost more weight than I thought.

Today, tossed into the mix, is a light snowfall where north of me is facing blizzard conditions after a seventy-degree weekend! I thought Spring was in the air but God has other plans for the world and it isn’t a gay old merry day for Spring, it’s downright winter until March 21 and then some. Maybe another blessing will be in the forced Changing of the Clocks this weekend. Yes, we SPRING FORWARD to lose an hour but we gain an extra hour of sunlight that just might possibly warm our days. Not that I’ve seen much sunlight this winter anyway and I’ve done an abnormal amount of complaining this winter season too. I pray for change with my coming New Year celebration on April 1st.

1 Cor. 15:51 "Behold, I shew you a mystery; We shall not all sleep, but we shall all be changed,"

Bouncing Back After A Fall

Philippians 4:13 (NKJV) “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” 

Bouncing Back After A Fall

As much as I hear other people whine and complain about politics, life, bills, and setbacks, my biggest complaint this year is SNOW! Never in my wildest dreams would I have thought I’d be complaining about too much snow, but here it is upon me now!

After this Sunday’s high of sixty splendiferous degrees, Monday was crash and burn let out the snowfall! Snow it did, all day! It never amounted to much but we finally had a week of a thaw that melted snow from as far back as Christmas, I was never so happy to see the resurfacing of the brown palette.

Monday, the white returned to the ground. Granted it was beautiful, granted it snowed the entire day but produced nary an inch but it was back, causing traveling headaches. The white was back on the ground, the bitter cold kicked into overdrive and we’re back to fluffy socks and big sweaters. For a couple of days, we enjoyed long sleeves but no need for a sweatshirt, scarf and gloves, and those were days topping out in the thirties. It’s not that I’m whining about cold and winter, my gripe is in the extended duration of deep cold spells. Yup, winter is like that! I KNOW!

While the negativity I feel with each snowfall now tries to tear me down, I am clearly in a bouncing back mode and am letting nothing beat me up! Scientifically, “crying is one way that the body removes stress chemicals,” from The Truth About Cancer. Sunday was a crying day and I do allow myself days of downtime because this upbeat, peppy all the time, no pain and just soaring gets to be a tiring chore like the shoveling of snow, instead of an accepted way of life.

I bet some of you are saying ‘you could’ve just went the chemo route and you’d already be in remission.’ You don’t understand this disease any more than I do. As a matter of fact, you and I don’t know any more about this illness than the big bad doctor. He’s just doing what they’ve continued to do for thirty and forty years. Times have changed. There are new ways of beating this Big C but the studies take too long and the doctor doesn’t wish to embrace these new ways so, in the meantime, people die all because of tradition. Their pockets are amply lined with money from insurance and the pharmaceutical companies and people are going out to pasture!

My body speaks to me and God speaks to me. John 10:27 says, "My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me.” For ME, the choice was simple, to follow that still small voice and go where He leads me. Here lately my body is telling me that something isn’t working and it kind of threw me off because I was having good, productive, pain-free days. Slowly the pain was sliding back into my legs and my back, walking was pained, muscles strained and with the winter's lack of sunshine and outside activity (besides shoveling snow), I was feeling a bit discouraged, what was wrong? It had to be something in my diet that I had changed.

You see, when you’re on such a strict protocol of food that you eat, the food then tells you what is wrong, like the recent frozen processed pizza I had. No, it wasn’t just that one pizza, it had to be something else. The only thing I could think of is wheat bread or organic oatmeal. I’m leaning more towards the cause being the WHEAT! 

I started allowing wheat bread into my diet around January first because I listened to other BC women who said that wheat wasn’t bad for our diets, go figure. I give up bread for a year and soar, let wheat bread in and crash. Really it is a no-brainer to figure that one out. 

Matt. 11:16 “But whereunto shall I liken this generation? It is like unto children sitting in the markets, and calling unto their fellows,”

I hear the term ‘sheeple’ in the political arena often and since I’m not into politics and don’t allow that negativity in, I assume it is a derogatory remark of ‘stupid people’ following along after every wind that blows. (Please, there is no need to elaborate for me, thank you.) I conclude this summation because sheep have no survival skills like other animals, no way of fending for themselves; set them in the wild and they will be slaughtered because they need a shepherd to guide them. I think on a religious term sheeple can be the people following Christ the Shepherd, we seem dumb because we’re following along after a non-living entity (to others) and the zombie effect has a hold on us.

I only feel dumbed-down when listening to man and anything HE (or she) has to offer me in way of the ‘direction’ I should go. I listened to the BC group of women because they are going through the exact same thing I am going through with the Natural Protocol route and thought for a brief moment that maybe they knew what they were talking about. Granted they have a lot of knowledge on the subject but I’ll say this again, what works for one does not work for all.

Deut. 8:8 “A land of wheat, and barley, and vines, and fig trees, and pomegranates; a land of oil olive, and honey;”

At one time, the wheat, barley, and figs were of purity, not tainted by man. Man dusts these grains with chemicals, modifies them for the almighty dollar, making people sick in the process.

Through those links I shared, can you see what I’m up against? I’m up against man and his destruction of man! Maybe at one time wheat wasn’t such a bad grain, but with the rise of organic everything, there is more to the story that ‘man’ isn’t telling you. It’s okay, you have a doctor with his prescribed candy to make you feel better. I think the term ‘sheeple’ should stand for man following man, period! To ME, that is EXACTLY what it means. The main thing that makes me ‘different’ is I follow the One and the only living God. As soon as I listen to a man (or woman) I fall, crash and burn. Interesting.

Back to my strict protocol thank you very much. Run along now, Billy is running up the hill after Bobby, and Janie isn’t far behind with Tommy in tow seeking the candy that Timmy is offering.

Jer. 12:13 “They have sown wheat, but shall reap thorns: they have put themselves to pain, but shall not profit: and they shall be ashamed of your revenues because of the fierce anger of the LORD.”

Luke 6:49 “But he that heareth, and doeth not, is like a man that without a foundation built an house upon the earth; against which the stream did beat vehemently, and immediately it fell; and the ruin of that house was great.”

What They Don't Say

Job 8:14 “Whose hope shall be cut off, and whose trust shall be a spider's web.”

What They Don’t Say

Did you know that arthritis, multiple sclerosis, Hashimoto's diseases and more are all auto-immune diseases? Not much unlike cancer, these diseases most of the time can all be safely treated without drugs but that is not what your doctor says. What they do say is here’s a drug and it is the only way to find relief from continuous pain. What they don’t say is that changing your diet and exercise has a profound effect on your longevity with a pain-free existence. They steal your hope.

I’ve said over and over again to change your diet, relieve your pain and illness and over and over again I hear people not having any success because they don’t have the willpower to save themselves, they’d much rather think a drug can do all the work for them.

Why is there a war on health? Why have doctors made healthy eating a back-burner portion of your visit? Why don’t they hold knowledge of what actually heals a person instead of basically killing people with drugs? Had doctors been taught this information to begin with many of our parents, grandparents, children, and grandchildren would not have died. I hear all too often that a doctor saved a life because the drug kept momma stable, alive for a few more years. Baloney!

Maybe drugs are a necessity, maybe they can help, but does the doctor offer you the change in diet FIRST as a level of defense to fight what ails you? If he told you that you had to give up dairy, meat, or caffeine would you take a drug over changing? I believe you would. We live in a self-satisfying world addicted to sugar, oils, meat, fat, and drugs.

I believe when I gave up alcohol all those years ago, on my own, without a twelve step program that was, to me, proof that I had the willpower to fight anything that was thrown at me. Granted, that this wretched disease is a little bigger than an alcohol addiction.

It pains me to see friends sick on a daily basis. Every day it seems I’m bombarded with news of people with the flu, stomach virus’, colds and everything in between. I have to stay away from the social arena for days because of the negative invasion of illnesses and the unhealthy eating habits and no one willing to change. Stay in bed, pop some pills, go to the doctor, remain sick for days or weeks. Change? That’s not an option, they’d rather whine and pop pills, it’s a safer route than change.

I often think of how far I’ve come and how tempted I am when around people who are living it up in the toxin-filled world. It’s not easy choosing vegetables over a cheese-smothered pizza, it would be so easy to choose a Pepsi over a glass of water, a chip over a grape, the list goes on and on. It’s not easy staying alert and watching every single thing that goes in my mouth. A crash is basically inevitable as long as I allow the negative influx of my surroundings to have an impact.

This calls to mind the disciples when Jesus went to pray, were asked to sit and watch, each time Jesus returned they were asleep. Each time I tell someone to help them change their diet and keep sickness at bay, they eat and eat and eat everything that is making them sick to begin with. It’s as if they’ve fallen asleep and my words fall on deaf ear. They don’t have time to change, they can’t or won’t change or it’s just too hard to change. If they’re going to die, they’re going to die happy and unhealthy. You can’t take a healthy body with you, right?

After reading yesterday’s post, you see I hit a roadblock. I’m as human as everyone else and I fall too. I only had a pizza, and it would’ve been very easy for me to cave in and drink a Pepsi, or guzzle some alcohol. I chose the lesser of two evils and had pizza. It’s bound to happen but I was not ready for the emotional roller coaster that came before the crash.

My mind plays tricks on me as I imagine each and every one of you fight with before indulging in something you know isn’t good for you but you do it anyway as a form of comfort. I needed comfort from my toying thoughts. As time passes by I wonder about things. I guess it’s normal since I’ve chosen this path without the medical field supporting me. But rest assured, I wonder.

So I hit a speed bump in my journey. Nothing new there, we’re all bound to come across one or two when fighting addictions, diet change, or on a health-filled journey. I need to brush myself off and get back in the saddle again and ride onto victory. It can be done and won.

I rode my stationary bike like there was no tomorrow and I went on a journey of riding down a sun-laden country road with blooming trees and a melody keeping me focused. It felt great to get away and when I looked out the window and saw more intense snowfall and shivering temps in the teens, I kept peddling. My bike ride took me away from the negative world into a wonder-filled palace that I’ll be visiting quite a few times until I get myself out of this funk.

The winter in life is almost over and spring is just around the corner. A time to shed clothes and peel away layers of inhibitions and be proud of making it through the dormant season into the blossoming Springtime of life! I haven’t made it yet but just a few more weeks and I’ll be well on my way to victory. Are you going to say the same thing? Are you at least trying to change?

What they don’t say is that there is HOPE for some change! If your doctor or your path isn’t brimming with hope and possibilities, it’s time to find a path that will lead to success. If lil old me can do it, I do have hope that you can too! 

Job 6:11 “What is my strength, that I should hope? and what is mine end, that I should prolong my life?”

Year's End Part II

Amos 8:11 “Behold, the days come, saith the Lord GOD, that I will send a famine in the land, not a famine of bread, nor a thirst for water, but of hearing the words of the LORD:”

End of the Year part II

Since I had such a nice Christmas and this year is worth a couple of End of Year posts I thought I’d relay the joyous season that rolled out like a red carpet for me and welcomed me on Christmas day.

The build-up to the day was nice, not too extravagant never an overabundance of spending, just another ‘spend what you have’ kind of Christmas. We’ve never been the type to go into debt to celebrate Christmas day; we’re the kind of people that if we don’t have the money to buy it, we don’t need it, and that has always worked. We never wake up after Christmas and say, ‘What did we do? How will we ever repay all this debt?’ I imagine a lot of folks do that but we’re not that type. Never have been and I don’t imagine we ever will be.

Luckily I have a dear friend and a loving niece who donated to me and it purchased my end of year vitamins and what a blessing that was, to know I’d have a couple more months of vitamins to welcome me into the New Year. Thank you, you know who you are and to me, a hidden blessing is a major blessing in MY life! 

The Christmastime weather was right out of a storybook. On Christmas Eve eve the temps dipped down to single digits and flurries began falling from the sky, they didn’t seem to stop! Both my guys had to work and the light fluffy snow didn’t hinder their drives on that night so I was content to head into Christmas Eve where they both had the days off. That was a gift in and of itself, and a white Christmas was unfolding with three to five inches of snow already on the ground at bedtime.

When I arose Christmas Eve the three to five inches of predicted snow was layed out right before my eyes! Light, fluffy, sweepable snow! The temps were still in the single digits but for some reason the blanket of snow made it feel cozy as the hour of sweeping passed by quite quickly. With my clothes layered, earmuffs intact, mittens to somewhat keep my fingers warm, the ‘play’ in the snow was seasonal. It’s here you must embrace it kind of snowfall.

I was kind of antsy thinking about the impending ‘family get-together’ but as usual, the tension subsided the closer the day came. While my illness is not open for discussion except on a more personal level (one-on-one) I knew at the family gathering it would just be chatter and laughter.

Our aunt who was scheduled to come down from South Dakota had to cancel her trip because not only did we get covered in snow, S. Dakota was hit too and she was staying safe. I believe she is eighty years old and yes, she still drives down here to Nebraska to visit her family on holidays, but the snow would halt her visit, this time. She was really missed too because she’s the cherubic beauty that bakes little loaves of banana, cherry, and spice bread for the family. She was missed for her spreading of love and cheer too but I was looking forward to her bread! 

Christmas morning arrived and everyone was safe who had to be. We were nestled in our warm home in the morning, gathered around the tree exchanging gifts. With the tree lit, our hands shuffled with a ‘here, open this!’ kind of excitement. I always cherish this time with my husband and son, because in that moment, the world evaporates and it is just us and love and that to me is what the holiday is all about. 

I won’t go on and on about the gifts I received because I’m not a braggart but I will say that I did receive my Grace Vanderwaal CD and wrist weights for my power walks, and Adam gave me a wonderful set of artistic colored pencils and an adult coloring book of horses! Oh the joy and excitement of Christmas morning.

I had wished my virtual family a Merry Christmas on Christmas Eve as I knew that Facebook would not be entered on Christmas Day. I do have priorities set and FB and Christmas aren’t one of them. After the gift exchange and listening to the CD, I called my mother back home and wished her the merriest of days. She did pretty well leading up to the day, remembering my dad but not with mournful cries but with lovingly missing him and trying to be the strong woman I know her to be. That was the only family from back home I heard from on Christmas.

It was a cold, blustery day and as we sat with the family in front of a big picturesque window; the flurries began to float to the earth once again. I had forgotten to look at the weather forecast but everyone was saying that they were calling for flurries. An hour or two passed and the flurries were still falling but more speedily and my anxiety grew. I don’t like driving in snow. Icy roads and swerving cars are not my cup of tea if they can be anyones.

By four o’clock I was pleading to go home. My chest hurts when anxiety is tense and I could feel the pain for quite awhile but told no one as not to ruin what a great Christmas everyone was having. Without being too graphic, my chest hurts where my illness resides. 

The drive home to me, was treacherous, even though I wasn’t doing the driving. The falling snow was intense with less than a mile visibility, and whiteout conditions were present on this two-lane highway. It was frigid-single-digit cold and the snow so fluffy that there wasn’t really much ‘sliding around’ but hubby was being cautious. Cars were speeding around us well above the sixty-five miles per hour speed limit because you know that there is NOTHING more important than getting to a destination, not even LIFE! It’s all about me, me, me on the roads, snow, ice or rain, it doesn’t matter!

We made it home safely and it took hours before my chest stopped hurting. We settled into a precious movie, ‘It’s a Wonderful Life’ (how fitting) and we sat and enjoyed the rest of the evening. I think I was so relaxed I slept through the first thirty minutes of the movie. My second call to my mother made the tension rise again but I was not allowing it to ruin a perfect Christmas Day! As the year ends…my days are being spent relishing my year, and cleaning up what is going to be known as the Christmas of 2017!

Happy New Year...To My Return!

The frozen Platte River

Prov. 7:19 “For the goodman is not at home, he is gone a long journey:”

Happy New Year…to my return

Well, that break went well, except I missed writing every day. I tried and I am committing myself to pulling out some of my fiction and working on it but my blog needs me, my friends need me. 

You might think I don’t see you suffering in pain, and you might think I’ve left you all behind never to spare another encouraging word but it is that need that pulled me back. I need you all as much as you need my encouraging words.

Again I am not pinpointing anyone out here; my words are for many who see themselves in what I say. Pain. Who doesn’t relate to that one? Sickness! Who can’t say they haven’t been warding off a sickness these past couple of months (if not years); Not many I’m sure. 

I realized something the other day and am quite honored to say that people respect me and expect a certain manner and moral compass from me. They look to me for inspiring and encouraging words and will quite surely make note of when I’ve veered off track.

I posted something on facebook the other day with a negative overtone. While everyone expects the positive and encouraging words from me, they are quick to call me on anything negative. It’s kind of funny though, for an entire year I watched people day after day (and still do) share negative and hate filled posts and no one calls them on spreading hate and negativity. They just bask in the glory of feeling good about themselves by sharing the hate with the world.

That’s when I realized something, people respect me so much and have come to expect a positive energy from me that when something appears to have a negative overtone they steer me back on the enlightened path. That’s when you know your words actually are having an effect on the masses. That’s when you know that you’ve touched the souls of many.

So by realizing people miss my words of encouragement, I of course do what I normally do and that is WRITE! I think you all miss my blog because it is like I am journaling and you like peeking in on all that is going on with my life and how much like your journey is to mine. Not in a bad nosey kind of way but a good concerned kind of way as you relate. You think to yourself, ‘I wonder how Joni is doing’ and maybe wonder what I do to get through the same pain-filled days you yourself might be trudging through. I think you might need that bit of encouragement that has left your reading days empty while I was away. 

I’m back. I can’t give up writing and I certainly can’t leave you all hanging in wonder. I’ve decided to take you on this journey of discovering my medical condition so I don’t feel so alone is the process of whatever is going on with my body. 

I’ll seek a doctor, I’ll get diagnosed and I’ll let you in on the homeopathic process I hope I’m allowed to take. The only way they can diagnose MS is through a spinal tap and just reading about it made me cringe, so that is a big no! An MRI okay, if it’s an open tube (I’m claustrophobic), if not, I’ll live with my disability as I’ve been doing for four almost five years now MED FREE! 

I have some stuff to share and no facebook post is enough space, I NEED my blog, I NEED to write, and most of all I NEED YOU, my friends who CARE about me. So come along on my continuing journey of Christ and see where it is I’m being led to now. If you’re reading this, like it or not, God called you along for the ride! 

My trees awakened by the morning sun!

Hope

Prov. 10:28 “The hope of the righteous shall be gladness: but the expectation of the wicked shall perish.”

Do you have hope? In the world? In people?

The definition of hope in the dictionary is: 
*the feeling that what is wanted can be had or that events will turn out for the best: or 
*to believe, desire, or trust:

Yesterday I had hope that someone would come and plow us out of the 14 inches of snow that lay on the ground like a baby in a crib. The snow had imprisoned us in our homes so hope was all we had to hold onto if we were ever going to see the ground again. On Wednesday we had a family event, we all took turns out there with the one shovel we own. A path was made around the house leading to the front door; a little area was made for my dog so she could get out there too. I had hope we’d be freed and it happened by us all pulling together with the same hope on our quest.

Prov. 13:12 “Hope deferred maketh the heart sick: but when the desire cometh, it is a tree of life.”

Funny thing is Monday and Tuesday we HAD to have a little area for Sassy but the winds kept blowing all the shoveled snow back and kept the area from staying clear. The clearing had to be shoveled time and time again. Even with my back problems I did my share of shoveling to keep up on the storm. 

Life is like that sometimes; we see hope within our grasp of becoming a reality only for it to be covered by the winds of negativity that blow all the ugliness back into a heap. We can shovel and shovel all of the loaded bull that is flung out there, we can hide and disguise it with snow-white clarity, but it will never be gone. People do not want to change. 

The winds blow to keep the sailboat sailing. Like lies, rubbish and insincerity, people are the winds that keep the negativity flowing. They thrive on it because they want to keep the momentum moving forward and around and around the world it goes.

I have no hope in mankind. They are all set on destroying the world and the way I see it, they are succeeding. One positive does not shift the tons of negatives you feed the pool of hate, it’s like throwing a pebble in a raging sea and then trying to find that pebble. It isn’t there! It got gobbled up and became a part of the ocean floor. That is what your one positive thought for the day does it becomes obliterated in a sea of hate.

Yesterday hope came mounted on a John Deere tractor with a snowplow attachment that shoveled tons and tons of snow out of the long driveway allowing passage to the road needed for transportation. He plowed for hours even coming up on the back lawn giving Sassy and extended path and a much easier route to the mailbox. 

Why was I sad? He did a good job but left behind humongous tire tracks and blackened soil all over the place taking away the beauty of crystallized joy that I saw for days. I was sad because it metaphorically spoke to me that this is what man does to the beauty in the world; they plow their way over the flowers of the world with their hate and anger leaving behind mud. 

I held out for hope that the warmth would beautify everything again, instead I woke to more snow, falling aimlessly trickling and blowing and covering all the ugliness exposed yesterday. Man has within his hand the power to beautify the world but instead he chooses the darkness that he tucks away in his soul. 

Prov.29:20 “Seest thou a man that is hasty in his words? there is more hope of a fool than of him.”

As dark matter swallows up parts of the cosmos, man in his darkness is swallowing up the globe called earth. They feed off this darkness and serve it to unwitting victims and people gobble this crud up like it’s mashed potatoes and gravy.

While I maintain hope in the pure white snow and the written Word of God. I’ll allow Him to judge the men who have sent their soul to hell all in the name of God? This is a sad day humans.

Isa. 38:18 “For the grave cannot praise thee, death can not celebrate thee: they that go down into the pit cannot hope for thy truth.”

Hope…there IS reason to HOPE is there not?

20 BLIZZARD 16

 

Pss. 55:8 “I would hasten my escape from the windy storm and tempest.”

Winter came in like a lamb. We had mild temps all throughout December and January. Nebraska wasn’t the only place that had mild temps, even back in Baltimore they were boasting of an uneventful mild winter until… the Blizzard of 2016 that is!

The term blizzard is defined as:
a storm with dry, driving snow, strong winds, and intense cold.
a heavy and prolonged snowstorm covering a wide area.

Baltimore was hit with 30 inches of snow and left the kids out of school for an entire week. This blast of snow looks to be Nebraska’s big storm of the year. We’re due a hefty 14 inches! If my husband didn’t have to work outside in this stuff, I’d probably enjoy the beauty of the falling snow a little bit more. But he does have off today and tomorrow so my heart and prayer goes out to anyone who has to be out in this storm.

When we first moved here to Nebraska, we were hit with TWO blizzards back to back dumping 24 inches of snow both times! So now you know where all of my back problems began to surface. Now seven years later the wintertime is nothing to write home about. I won’t call it anything but a mild winter.

I knew Baltimore was going to be hit hard when I heard the term ‘Snowpocalypse’ and ‘Snowmageddon’ but namely when I heard they NAMED the storm, Jonas! When did they start naming winter storms? Goodness! 

I think they name the storms for the severity they expect, like this one that is hitting Nebraska they named Kayla. Well that’s not a life-threatening name. The thing about this one is that it is a very WET snow and has it clinging like wet napkins to everything in its path! The winds are howling, the snow is flying horizontally and the house trembles at every gust. 

I was up very early and it looked deep out there but the worse is yet to arrive or so they say and from the looks of it, I’d say they nailed this one! I’m sure I’ll have more pictures as the day rolls along. I’ve been up since 5:30 snapping shots in the dark until the light came and now… it is even DEEPER!

I want to run out and make a snow angel! Maybe later when I try to get my dog out there to do her business, if my back allows. Other than that the day is definitely a stay-inside-cook-and-enjoy-the-view kind of day. Cocoa anyone? 

More pics to come later as the storm rages on

early morn

A Snowcapped Morn

Rom. 2: 19 And art confident that thou thyself art a guide of the blind, a light of them which are in darkness

Snowcapped Morn

The snow is hugging the trees this morn

In a blanket of purity’s glow.

My soul is comforted in Christ the Lord

By a Light of wondrous show.

Each branch is cradled in soft cotton

Frozen is the arm and stem.

The Lord asks me to raise my eyes

And no man am I to condemn.

My snowblind eyes squint to see

The white that clings to the tree

God Himself has locked his arms

Around the mortal part of me.

Each morning I rise to a glorious sight

I bow my head and pray.

The Lord has wrapped me in His love

The sunrise a sweet bouquet.

Winter Peace

1 Cor. 16:6 And it may be that I will abide, yea, and winter with you, that ye may bring me on my journey whithersoever I go.

Winter Peace

A blanket of snow covers the ground

for all of the world to see.

I relish every moment

a flake falls down on me.

I see life through different eyes

while everyone is distracted.

Things slow down to a seconds pace

with many lives impacted.

The sounds are all amplified

through the overlay of snow.

Allowing you to hear the wind

breaking the trees bough.

People clothed in scarves and gloves

their boots protect their feet.

But often times people dress

for a fashionista retreat.

The multitude of masses

dress for outward show.

Would they dare robe themselves

for the God that we all know?

I don’t care for my skin to wrinkle

and wither from the sun.

I only care my actions please

the Great and Mighty One.

I’ll wear winter in my heart

All throughout the year.

And fill every single day

With the peace of Christmas cheer!

Job 13: 5 O that ye would altogether hold your peace! and it should be your wisdom.

Poetry Sunday ~ SNOW!

Job 37: 6 For he saith to the snow, Be thou on the earth; likewise to the small rain, and to the great rain of his strength.

SNOW!

A crystallized snow drapes the ground

Covering the earth with nary a sound.

Falling like stardrops raining down

Christmas day draws near.

A velvet blanket for all to see

Frosty white clings to the tree

Now it’s time for a decree.

My Savior’s ever dear!

Immaculate snow; lacy night

Woke me to a glorious sight

Purity wins with all my might

My mind’s now vividly clear.

Prov. 25: 13 As the cold of snow in the time of harvest, so is a faithful messenger to them that send him: for he refresheth the soul of his masters.

A Wellspring of Imagination

On days like this, where the wind is howling, a late spring snowstorm is sweeping across the state, and a mug of coffee in my hand, this is when I have a wellspring of ideas. In this setting, the birds have risen early and are all scattering about getting caught up in a wind gust, the sun is refusing to come out and play and school buses are plowing through the snow-covered roads filled with children wishing they could have just stayed safe at home.


It’s mornings like this when I look out the window and see the trees come alive, eerily walking in the cornfields only to realize it is the wind sweeping branches across the field and the crane hiding within them for a brief break from the gusting winds.

It is at this time my imagination is full of ideas wandering into a different realm that normal man and women dare not go. But writer’s, we’re of a different caliber; we see a story in every waking moment. Upon every tragedy that faces the nation we climb into our imagination box and create a story. Hiding within every triumph and selfless attitude that shake the people’s psyche to the core, a story is born.

Inspiration is the doorway to the Wellspring of Imagination. While normal (or not so normal) folk gripe and grumble of each aspect of their lives that bother them, the writer instead digs in and finds a story to tell. While journalist go out and seek a story to give to the people, the writer need only to open his eyes at sunrise and see a story unfold right out there window of inspiration.

As a writer, you know full well that the story is right there, tumbleweeds roll, thunder claps, lightning blazes across the sky, houses topple, trees sway, the music is words that have come alive in your imagination which sends you to the keyboard, tapping out a tale for readers to catch a glimpse of in the quiet of their day.

As you, the writer, are filled with inspiration from the previous days events, the glorious sunrise that puts shadows across the fields, the chaos communities endure places you smack in the middle with a story to unfold. You are going to write a fictional story or non-fiction that sheds a new light in the wells of darkness sweeping the earth.

You writer, have the Wellspring of Imagination right at your fingertips waiting to be expelled. There is no need for you to be dismayed because you can express what you imagine other people are feeling at the moment. The wellspring of imagination opens up to you just as a new day dawns each and every morn.

On April 18th, 2013, the snow blowing in has caused me to be inspired in ways you cannot imagine. It has awoken in me the need to write, relay the anxiety people are feeling with such  storms in supposed Spring. This is the season where trees burst forth seed, plants come alive; life, as we know it takes on new meaning. This is the season earth has taken on new tragedies, new eruptions of turmoil. This my friends, is the Season of the Writer!

Poetry Sunday ~ Bough Breaks

Ezek. 15:2 Son of man, What is the vine tree more than any tree, or than a branch which is among the trees of the forest?


Bough Breaks
*  *  *
Snowdrifts pile on the tree,
a morning of beauty for eye to see.
Branches bow in prayer to Him
whiteness clings to every limb.


Boughs moan with the slightest breeze,
broken down with the slightest sneeze.
A whispering wind the twig it grieves,
breaking the sprig that has no leaves.


Lonely and cold the cows they roam
in the open field called home.
No shelter from the bended wings,
I hear them calling, the morning sings.


The broken branch I see it bleed,
giving earth its one last seed.
Hear me Lord, my earthly cries,
fill my heart with joyous skies.


For all that's broken, now must mend.
my heart, my soul made to bend.
For only You gives all that's real,
the earth and I will slowly heal.

Poetry Sunday ~ Orb of the Night

Job 31:26 If I beheld the sun when it shined, or the moon walking in brightness;

Orb of  the Night
(c) Joni Zipp
***
The moon is full this quiet night
lending the snow a glistening light.
Trees stretch out their arms in praise
shadows dance in the moonlight haze.

Quivering branches lend a clutter
to all the snow-capped fields aflutter
The orb shines down in wedded bliss
to the ground it gives a kiss.

Stars they’re hiding from the glow
of the moons showering show.
Animals tucked safely in homes
sound asleep while moon glow roams.

I raise my voice the echo sounds
off the billowy cotton grounds.
Inner cry for welcome release
into His hands I find my peace. 

All rights reserved: copyright © Joni  Zipp


Pss. 136:9 The moon and stars to rule by night: for his mercy endureth for ever.

The Miracle Dog

John 6: 2 And a great multitude followed him, because they saw his miracles which he did on them that were diseased.
***

Do you believe in miracles? You’ll probably say, “Yeah sure.” But maybe with some apprehension you’ll try hard to remember seeing the last one or you might wonder what really was a miracle or just pure luck.

Let me tell you, there is no such thing as luck, they are all miracles and blessings, whether you like to believe it or not, the Holiest of Holies, rains a blessing on you, he doesn’t shower you with luck and money; blessings and miracles are so much more explosive than sheer luck.

Remember I told you my dog Sassy was hit by a truck last Tuesday? She walked around pacing and yelping in pain. Not a constant yelp, it was only when she went to open her mouth. Money hindered all possibilities of getting her to a vet, so prayer was our only source. A lot of you might say, “That’s foolish.” Well, not in my shoes. When you’ve been in my shoes, then you can judge for yourself.

For now all I live on is prayer. Seems to be working. Saturday evening the snow started to fall. Not just an inch or two, by Sunday morning there was easily six inches of the white stuff, enough to hinder us from going to church. Then throughout the day, six or seven more fell stopping all activity on the roads, causing hazardous conditions throughout the state, school closings and the like. Cancellations of all kinds were being posted on TV.

Early Monday I HAD to get out and shovel some kind of path for Sassy, so she could get out there and do her business. She was yelping minimally but she also had confined herself into the back room of the house where it is very cold. I read somewhere that the cold eased pain for dogs, and she instinctively knew this because this is where she lay, curled in a ball for days on end, never coming into the warmer portions of the house.

We all kicked into mothering Sassy. Beau, Adam and I all took to hand feeding her, making soft foods that we knew she liked and took with apprehension but still she ate and drank water on occasion. A tough week to say the least, then the snow to top it all off, what an amazing fete that lay before us.

On Tuesday, yesterday, something strange took place. As I sit here tapping on the keys, movement out of the corner of my eye. Sassy peeking around the corner at me. She was looking for food. I rose to make her two hot dogs which she devoured. Then I found her laying in the bathroom all snug as a bug on a rug. I moved her to the hallway on a towel, and later she came into the living room, with coaxing and hasn’t returned to the cold cave since.

She’s feeling better! A  living miracle! Still healing but definitely on the road to recovery. A neighbor came with a plow truck last night, unburied our truck and made a path for us and our neighbors behind us. Sassy almost barked full throttle, but a little *woof* was let out and I sighed in relief. My dog was now in the throes of a miracle. Something money can never buy. A miracle is prayers answered!

Praise be to God, and no other!

Poetry Sunday~ A Winter Scene

A Winter Scene
***
The morning breathes a sigh of relief,
a new dawn has broken through.
The snow it whispers from the sky
 the blush of a fresh days hue.

Trees are barren as they sleep
each limb has clinging cotton
crisp cold air wafts throughout
squirrels are all but forgotten.

The crunching noise it lingers
as deer and elk creep by.
Silence holds this winter day
as snow falls from on high.

The air is full of Christmas
a holy day abounds.
Bells and holly carry on
the wondrous seasons sounds.

Mystery here is clinging
as angels sing a song,
coming is a new born babe
leading men along.

Awaken all you nations
hear the words I plea,
God has sent a part of Him
for sins of you and me.

Generations have come and gone
but everything's the same.
The Holy night is cherished
as the very day He came!

Poetry Sunday ~ Emergence

 Gen 1:11 And God said, Let the earth bring forth grass, the herb yielding seed, and the fruit tree yielding fruit after his kind, whose seed is in itself, upon the earth: and it was so.

***

Emergence

by: Joni Zipp

What’s this I see beneath the snow
ever so green and lush
stately blades of grass I glimpse
with sun-dripped grains of blush.

The buds are beginning to burst
right forth from branches bare.
Soon will be an abundance of leaves
with twigs and arms to spare.

The fields are dancing with life right now
the squirrels they run and play.
Scampering about from tree to tree,
enjoying the expanded day.

Approaching are the winds of Spring,
the season will emerge.
The final day of death occurs
when mind and soul converge.

Winter Wonderland

Job 37:6 For he saith to the snow, Be thou on the earth; likewise to the small rain, and to the great rain of his strength.

I’m wondering if it’s interesting to write about snow? I know Frost did it in very few words but the impact and images have spanned years. (referring to Stopping by the Woods on a Snowy Evening?)

Today it is snowing again. It began Sunday as we were leaving church to head home. I was so thankful I got the service in because the sermon propels me through the week on a spiritual high.

I started on Facebook, woohoo’ing and yipeeing but it was met with polar responses. No pun intended. Some like snow and some don’t and some wish they were in the land of God awful heat, raking up a.c. bills and spending way too much money on antiperspirant.(That is and never will be Joni!)

I was born and raised in the wonderland of Maryland. We had snow on a yearly basis and I was the first one with excitement quivering in my voice when I exclaimed, “It’s snowing!” The white stuff falling from the skies pushed me to believe that God was as pure as the driven snow and that He loved me because he gave me this gift, yearly!

When I had my son on December 27th, of 1995, I was whisked away to the hospital as snow flurries fell. Two weeks later we had a blizzard! A BLIZZARD and a child who needed his inoculation come hell or high water. Well, the deep snow didn’t keep me from getting him to the doctors and since that day forward, my son shares in the delight and excitement of snow also!

Fast forward to 2003 when I was led to the dreary, dismal, heat drenched Dallas Texas. The vain laden state that swells with arrogance and smells of smog. What the heck was I thinking, oh yeah, I was in love! In love with a man from Nebraska. For six years I longed to come to Nebraska for the snow, the family, the tightly woven communities, the humble beautiful nature of true people of the mid-west.

Sure my first year in Texas when I told everyone I was bringing snow with me, they scoffed and laughed, “We ain’t had that stuff in ten years.” That year...it snowed! God didn’t let me down, I knew He Wouldn’t! For six years he gave me a gift, a day here in winter, a day there, but I saw snow.

Our first snow in Nebraska happened in October! How excited was I??? Walked a mile to go sledding in it! So today after three days of watching the white stuff fall graciously from the sky, I will once again go walking in the purity and feel it grace my face with its tiny tentacles of ice. I will wash my body in the silkiness and feel as if God’s own fingers are touching me.

Once again...my gift from God!

Quotation Saturday

Snow in October?

***

If we had no winter, the spring would not be so pleasant: if we did not sometimes taste of adversity, prosperity would not be so welcome.
~ Anne Bradstreet (1612-1672) 'Meditations Divine and Moral,' 1655

***

The tendinous part of the mind, so to speak, is more developed in winter; the fleshy, in summer. I should say winter had given the bone and sinew to literature, summer the tissues and the blood.
~John Burroughs (1837 - 1921), The Snow-Walkers

***

O Winter! ruler of the inverted year, . . . I crown thee king of intimate delights, Fireside enjoyments, home-born happiness, And all the comforts that the lowly roof Of undisturb'd Retirement, and the hours Of long uninterrupted evening, know.
~William Cowper (1731 - 1800), Task (bk. IV, l. 120)
***

If winter is slumber and spring is birth, and summer is life, then autumn rounds out to be reflection. It's a time of year when the leaves are down and the harvest is in and the perennials are gone. Mother Earth just closed up the drapes on another year and it's time to reflect on what's come before.
~Mitchell Burgess Northern Exposure, Thanksgiving, 1992

Nature...

***

I would feel more optimistic about a bright future for man if he spent less time proving that he can outwit Nature and more time tasting her sweetness and respecting her seniority.
~E. B. White (1899 - 1985)

***

Mountains inspire awe in any human person who has a soul. They remind us of our frailty, our unimportance, of the briefness of our span upon this earth. They touch the heavens, and sail serenely at an altitude beyond even the imaginings of a mere mortal.
~Elizabeth Aston,The Exploits & Adventures of Miss Alethea Darcy, 2005
***
Ever the optimist...
***

The act of writing is an act of optimism. You would not take the trouble to do it if you felt it didn't matter. ~Edward Albee
Most of the shadows of this life are caused by standing in one's own sunshine.

~Ralph Waldo Emerson

***

Whatever you can do, or dream you can do, begin it; boldness has genius, power and magic in it.

~Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

***

Those who tell you it's tough at the top have never been at the bottom.

~Joe Harvey

Final thought...
***

In good writing, words become one with things.

~Ralph Waldo Emerson